Rock of Ages Page #7

Busy falling in love.

Let's go, Donny,

Hey, you okay?

Oh, that? Don't sweat him.

That's just my ex, Donny.

Anyway, how you holding up, baby?

I'd say men are pigs but that'd be

totally unfair to pigs, so....

I gave up a long time ago

trying make men respectable.

There's only one place

you're gonna get respect in this joint.

You got to take that stage over there.

That stage is a pedestal.

And when you're up there,

you're untouchable.

And when you're up there,

you can have it....

Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it

Take Destiny.

She loves to laugh

She loves to sing

She does everything

And Sapphire.

She loves to move

She loves to groove

She loves the lovin' things

All night

Oh, every night

There's one motto here.

So hold tight

-Hold tight

-Baby, hold tight

When it comes to the customer....

She said, "Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it"

She said, "Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it"

Gentlemen, I bring you your next star.

Paul, you know l love you,

but it's a pass.

Shh.

Rock is dead, but the pop thing's hot.

Hold on

Hold on

Does he rap?

Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it

Any way

Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it

Oh, she said, "Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it"

-Any way you want it

-That's the way you need it

Any way you want it

Any way

Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it

Any way

Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it

Any way

Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it

Any way

Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it

h, she said, "Any way you want it

That's the way you need it

Any way you want it"

Mark. And play back.

You got silky sheets

Baby, put me underneath

I'm your undercover love

Oh, oh, oh, oh

-I'm your undercover love

-Paul!

Cut! Cut! Cut!

This is the stupidest thing

I've ever done. l can't do it.

What's your name, Joshy-Z?

I'm trying to make you look cool.

I want you to look funky fresh.

But you have to let not suck the next take.

Back to one, everyone!

-I think we should take five, you know?

-First good idea I've had all day.

Take five, everyone!

This feels all wrong, Paul.

I'm telling you, this pop-band sh*t

is where everything is headed.

Just trust me. You're working

with top, classy talent here.

Paul, I am Wolfgang Von Colt.

Not Joshy-Z, nor the Z-Guyz.

No, you are not the Z-Guyz either.

You are the Z-Guyeezz.

Double the E, double the Z,

double the flavor.

-The "flavor"?

-Yes.

What does Z even stand for?

Nothing. You're over-thinking it.

Names that end in Z are very popular

with the 14-to-21 year olds.

We did a whole focus group on this.

Numbers don't lie.

I don't want to do it, man.

I have had it up to here

with your negativity, Joshy-Z.

-And you know, Donny-Z and Kevy-Z and--

-Joey.

--Joey-Z, they're not too thrilled either.

Think about them, huh?

Don't you think at least we should do

a gig before we shoot a music video?

-You want a gig? Mm.

-Yeah.

Watch this. Brat.

-Bourbon.

-Dennis. Paul Gill.

Paul, you got a lot of nerve calling me.

Okay, okay, okay.

I was a douche. l get it. But listen close.

I'm gonna make it up to you.

I'm listening.

I need The Bourbon tonight.

I will pack the place.

I will get the whole town

to come out for it.

Who's playing?

Stacee Jaxx.

His first solo gig. And I've got a new act

that you are gonna love.

And this time,

every cent goes to the house.

-Every cent.

-Every last penny...

...brother,

of which there will be millions!

Do we trust him?

Yes.

Okay, deal.

You're one lucky son of a gun.

See you tonight.

-Louise, call the PR department.

-Paul, I need--

Shush. I'm rolling here.

Call the PR department and tell them l

need to buy all the advertising blocks...

...on every drive-time radio station

this afternoon.

Stacee's Rolling Stone cover.

It hit the newsstands an hour ago.

How bad is it?

Stacee Jaxx.

On the phone?

Oh, my God.

Hey.

Hey Man.

Man.

Stace. Seriously--Oh!

Can you please ask Hey Man

to just chill for a second or two, man?

Yes, I'm on that. Don't worry about it.

I just tore the editors a new one.

You should've heard me, man. Ho, ho, ho.

-Sh*t!

-Page 68, second paragraph.

-Read.

-Okay.

Okay.

Ah....

Uh....

"Stacee Jaxx will tell you

he's a cowboy...

...but lately he seems more like a...

...'boy-cow' who's gotten lost

in the herd.

But the biggest danger is the man

who seems to be calling the shots...

...his manager Paul Gill,

a man so oily...

...Exxon might want to reconsider

buying stock in him."

Okay, well, you know,

that could also mean that I'm real slick.

Because l am. There's no such thing

as bad publicity.

Ha-ha-ha. Okay. That was funny.

"Even the legendary Bourbon Room

isn't sacred.

This reporter learned that Stacee Jaxx

and Paul Gill...

...walked away with virtually

all of the night's proceeds."

Whoa.

That part.

Is that true?

It's not not true.

It's more more true...

...than l would perhaps prefer.

Okay, yes, I'll be clearer about that.

No more bullshit. No more bullshit.

I wish that the true part were falser.

You know what, man?

Let's start all over again.

Let's turn that frown

the right way around.

What do you say, sad clown?

I got something for you. One-of-a-kind.

Ha-ha.

One hundred and fifty years old.

Priceless.

Look, so what if some...

...hack journalist

took some potshots at you?

All your life,

you have wanted to be number one.

You still are number one.

Let's toast to that.

And I'm telling you,

I'm gonna get that reporter fired...

...so please don't dump that on my head.

I would never do that.

Mm.

It's priceless.

Mm-hm.

You're fired, Paul.

Hey Man.

It just goes to show

that sin doesn't sell anymore.

And if Dennis Dupree

can't pay by midnight, well....

Then it looks like Los Angeles

will be able to reclaim the real estate.

Drew?

Sherrie. What are you doing here?

Sorry. l didn't realize

you owned the place.

Wait, wait, wait.

How are you?

I'm great. Quitting The Bourbon was

the best thing that could've happened.

Yeah.

Me too.

What are you wearing?

Oh, uh.... This is kind of my new look...

...for the band I'm in.

The Z-Guyeezz.

-Yeah, I've heard of them.

-No.

Not them.

The Z-Guyeezz.

Double the E, double the Z,

double the flavor.

And we're playing The Bourbon tonight.

Huh.

How about you? You singing?

No...

...I'm dancing.

Aerobics. I teach aerobics.

Ever see Stacee again?

-What do you mean?

-After your big fling.

-Wait, you think he and l--?

-I don't think.

I saw you.

-What did you see?

-The night I played.

You were walking out of his dressing room,

he was zipping up his pants.

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