Rock Star Page #4

Thank you.|All right, two lovely people.

Quickly, boys.|Boat's going in a minute.

Good afternoon, my darlings.|Look, I've been meaning to tell you.

There's a longstanding rule|that wives and girlfriends...

...aren't allowed on the bus.

The boys don't like distractions|when they're working on their music.

You can travel with the wives.|They're nice.

Yeah, well, who are they?

That's IKirk's astrologer...

...and his physical therapist.

And that, well, we all know what|that is, right? We'd better go.

-I'm gonna ride with Emily.|-Oh, no. Sorry. You can't do that.

The boys need you there|when they work on the tunes.

Go ahead, babe. I'm fine.

Quick as you can.

-You sure?|-Yeah, I'm sure.

I didn't know about the rule.

Yeah. Just get on the bus.

-Have fun.|-You too. Be careful.

The boys are waiting in the back.|They're working. They need you.

-What's up, lzz?|-What's up?

Izz, you want some?

I was gonna go over the schedule.

Suit yourself.|It's good for writing lyrics.

You know, he's a rock star now.|The normal rules don't apply.

-I didn't say anything.|-You didn't have to.

Somebody's jealous.

No. No, I'm not.

I just know him|and he's not that--

Like hell he's not.|He's a guy, isn't he?

Look, we all know exactly|what happens on that bus.

I met Ghode on that bus.

I didn't say anything.

I know it's crazy,|but it comes with the territory.

You either drive yourself batty|trying to change it or you adapt.

You gotta let him off the leash|once in a while.

Or they get cranky. At the end|of the day, they always come home.

And who says you can't|have your own fun?

Exactly.

-Do you want some?|-No, I'm good. I just had breakfast.

-Okay. Here.|-Hair of the dog.

Here's some advice from me.|Number one: Learn to share.

Number two:
Get very close|with his accountant.

And three:

Don't sign anything.|I had to learn that the hard way.

You know what I always say.|If you love someone, let them go.

And if they come back to you|with very expensive jewelry...

...then it's meant to be.

I hope I am not as cynical|as you are when I am your age.

Honey, she's 23.

221/2 .

-23|-I am 221/2 .

You guys were at my birthday party.|I was born....

Move aside, you scallywags.|You're getting in the way of future sales.

Be nice to this bloke from MTV.

They're not playing|our videos as much...

...since the boys trashed their set.

Tell them about that thing|you do with your tongue.

-All right, and here we are.|-Thanks, Mats.

I'll be back in half an hour.|Mind your backs, please!

-Chris, I need to talk to you--|-You can't call me that here.

I need to talk to you.

I gotta do this MTV thing,|then talk to a producer--

I know your schedule.|I get a copy every day.

-Then you know when I'm done.|-I'm leaving.

-Just meet me at the hotel.|-I'm going to Seattle.

Come on.

Em, what the hell|is going on in Seattle?

-Marci and I have been talking--|-Who's Marci?

You know who Marci is.|My roommate, Rob's girlfriend.

Sorry. I know who she is.|I've got things on my mind.

I know, I know.

We've been talking about this business|and we got our loan.

-We're going to Seattle to--|-When did you do this?

While the wives were out shopping.

Is this a money thing?|lf you need money--

You know I didn't mean it|like that, Em. I swear.

-Are you leaving me?|-No. I'm not leaving you.

But I am leaving this.|I cannot do this every day.

-I thought we're having a great time.|-We are. It has been fun.

But, baby, this is all happening|to you. And it's great.

But it's different for me.|I can't follow a bus all day.

You don't have to do that anymore.|We're getting our own car.

It's not about the car.

What is it?

You know, it's wanting a life.

And I really want to do this thing|with Marci in Seattle.

Can we hook up in Seattle|when I get there?

Of course. Of course.

All right.

I'll talk to Mats|and get you our numbers...

...so you can call|when you get there.

So I know you got there|safe, all right?

So I'll see you in Seattle?

Can I give you some advice, mate?

-What's up, A.C.?|-Let the chick go, man.

-So how are we doing?|-Lovely. Thank you very much.

-I'll be back to check on you.|-I'm sure you will.

Freshening up the blood.

The liver doesn't work as good|as it did when I was your age.

Listen, make it easier on yourself.

There's no way it can work.

You start off with|the best intentions.

But there's so much p*ssy coming|at you every day that...

...finally it wears you down.|Then you crack.

Aren't you married to a supermodel?

Yeah, you know why? Because I can.

And you can too.

You got these birds dreaming|about having it off with you.

That makes the guys want to be you.

The guys are the ones|that buy the records.

So if the chicks don't want you,|the guys are gone.

I mean, put it this way:

Your job is to live the fantasy|other people only dream about.

Don't go in half-assed.

Dream big.

Live the life.

-You running for pink slips?|-See you in hell, Bat Boy.

You ready, Robin?

Go!

You got yourself a Ferrari!

Hello, Wichita.

Izzy? Oh, my God, is that lzzy?

I love you!

Watch out!

Out of my bloody way!

-What's going on?|-His wife ran off with Peter Gabriel.

-Let me get that.|-That doesn't work.

Ladies, ladies, please.|A little bit of decorum, please.

Now, listen. We've got limited space.|Just be patient.

I gotta check your credentials,|so have your p*ssy passes out.

If I get to be with lzzy,|I am going to sh*t bricks.

Well, yeah, that'll make|a lasting impression.

-Do you dance at Chubbies?|-No.

You should. You have a killer body.|It's not totally nude there.

We wear G-strings,|so the guys respect us way more.

Yeah, that is so true.

Nothing says "respect" Iike cramming|a strip of Lycra up your ass.

F***ing-A, mama!

Yes, that's fine.|You're absolutely fine.

Oh, hi. Hello. Now, that's a very|important little P, isn't it?

-In you go. Nice.|-What's the "P" stand for?

Yes, it's "pass."

Oh, yeah? It's not "pimp"?

-No, it's "personal"....|-"Personal friend."

Yeah, "personal friend of the band."|Yeah. One sec.

I'm not here to check up|on him. I was invited.

-He's doing interviews.|-Interviews? Okay.

Tell you what, darling.

I'm not really sure|where he is, actually.

If you'd like to wait just....

Of course, wait here if you like.|He's actually down there.

What are you doing here?

I live here, Chris.

I thought you were in Seattle.

We're in Seattle.|You're in Seattle.

I'm sorry.

-You forgot.|-No.

Yeah, you did.|You forgot I was coming.

Wait. I did not forget|you were coming. Mats.

Told him to arrange-- Didn't I say|to remind me she was coming?

Sh*t. I'm so sorry.|I really screwed up, mate.

-What do you mean?|-Chris, please.

You don't need people|taking falls for you. Please.

No, Em. I did not forget.

Chris, don't lie to me.|Please don't lie to me.

It might've slipped my mind.|But I didn't forget. I remembered....

I didn't remember,|but I didn't forget, okay?

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