RocknRolla Page #8

and I'll see you on Monday.

You are scary good at that.

- Do you miss it?

- Shut up, Bob, or I'll slap you.

All right, let's go pick up the paperwork

from your boyfriend.

And drop me off on the way, huh?

I'm going back to bed.

Can I come?

- Moron, what do you think you're doing?

- What, John?

Letting creatures in my yard

without my consent.

John, they're good stuff.

Scotch and Cockney.

Like the drink and the sparrow.

I am Malcolm, and this is my friend

and colleague Paul.

You know, like the Christian saint.

Paul doesn't say much.

He's too busy thinking deep thoughts.

Come on, John. We know you.

We're big fans.

You're what they call a real RocknRolla.

Out, on your way.

Bon voyage and f*** off.

What is this, a sit-down?

A f***ing demo?

This is a demonstration,

a demonstration of peace.

Where the f*** did you find

these two junkies?

Conference, kazi, now.

That's the last time

I'm having you take the piss, Pete.

Next time, you're on your own.

I'm sorry.

I just thought that you might've liked

a bit of company.

I'm dead, Pete. What does that tell you?

It tells you that dead people

don't like company.

- Now, jog them on.

- All right, I'll tell them to leave.

Yes, you f***ing well will.

Smelly junkies.

Meeting adjourned.

You've scared them off, sing-along.

But with a welcome like that,

it's not all that shocking.

Lucky you're not following them, Pete.

Pete, where's the painting?

Good shot. Good shot.

It's the werewolf brothers.

What you got for us today, boys?

Anything good?

Paul, please exhibit to the audience

the fine artifact.

Gentlemen, we are entering the realm...

...of the ancient art form

of paint on canvas.

I'll have it. How much?

One moment, sir. There's a pitch

which comes with this painting.

I don't want the pitch. I said I'll have it.

It's a very rare

and expensive painting, sir.

Is it?

There you go, boys.

Have a week in the snow.

Good afternoon, gentlemen.

It's been a pleasure.

Come on, me man. Hey.

Tank, what is it? I'm in a bit of a rush.

You owe me, Arch.

- Oh, yeah?

First, I found your painting. Now I found

out who's been taking Lenny's money.

Mr. Darcy.

Well, don't f*** about. Who is it?

"Let myself in. Thought your lady

might like the painting.

Love, Cookie. "

- Hello?

- It's me.

- Who's me?

- Me.

Ah.

Well, what do you want?

You.

Oh.

Well, you better come in, then.

- Yup?

We found out about our informer.

I've got it in my hand right now.

The informer, the one who's responsible

for all the time we've been seeing.

- All of them, including mine.

- Well, who is it, then?

Who the f*** is Sidney Shaw?

No, Sidney Shaw

is a pseudonym, you idiot.

They never use their real name.

Look, get around here

and let me have a look, okay?

All right.

Where did he learn

a word like pseudonym?

Look at you, huh? Good as new.

I have to go now.

So you fancy sharing some dancing lessons

with me later on in the week?

A bit of the old salsa?

I'll take you up on that.

- Oh, I have something for you.

- Uh-huh.

Thought you might like it because

I know how much you like paintings and all.

So you like it?

You've got very good taste,

Mr. One Two.

Oh...

- What's happened, Len?

- Well, they broke my leg in four places.

Didn't you hear?

That bastard's made me limp

for the rest of my days.

What do you want me to do?

Well, I need that painting, Arch.

- I need it real bad.

- I'll get that for you, don't you worry.

- I think I can do better than that.

- What?

Someone has been at the Russian's money.

Couple of silly gunslingers.

- Well, who?

- You know them.

- You don't like them either.

- I'm not playing f***ing games here, Arch.

Who is it?

Mumbles, Bob and One Two.

So why did you call, Johnny?

Sorry, Johnny's not here.

But the pipe is.

And the pipe says

Johnny heard you were in trouble, boys.

Whoever we're talking to, will you

please relay the message to Johnny?

Tell him that his dad, his jack-in-the-box-

surprise, gangster daddy, paid us a visit.

Shut down a few of our venues.

Intends to shut down a few more

unless Mr. Quid puts in an appearance.

Why are you talking to the pipe, Roman?

You're madder than I am.

Come back, Johnny. Come back home.

Now, Johnny will come quietly...

...but you may have a couple of problems

with the pipe.

Buy us both a cup of tea.

No need for any noise,

we'll let Pete sleep on.

Is this a bad time, One Two?

I mean, we can always

come back a bit later.

You wanna take the stairs

or the elevator, Mr. Cole?

Bandy, come here.

- You been drinking?

- No, Mr. Cole.

Think before you drink,

before you drive me mad.

Hello, Len, it's me.

Archy.

I've got the boys

wrapping up One Two in a carpet now.

Get over here.

- Yeah, I'll be around in a little bit.

- Good.

Hold on.

- Who's there?

- One Two, it's us.

Come up.

And it looks like

I'll be bringing the others and all.

Not too bright this lot, are they?

Hold on.

Look, I gotta go, got another call.

F***ing hell, it's all go on this job.

- Hello?

- Archy, we got your boy.

What's left of him.

You might wanna hose him down.

He smells like a rotten goat.

Uri.

Da, Uri, I'm sorry.

- But I still don't like it.

- I don't care what you like, Victor.

I'm in charge. Now, wait here.

Your last girl cost us 20 million.

One before, even more.

God knows how much

this one will cost us.

Victor, you're so cheap.

Can I come in?

Sorry to surprise you,

but I have something for you.

A token of my appreciation.

What's this for?

Please do not be insulted

but you have come to mean a lot to me...

...and I value much more

than just your service.

This is simply just a reflection

of my appreciation.

I would like to ask you

something personal.

Would you marry me?

Well, I think I might need

a couple of days.

Just to think about it.

Well, sure. Of course.

Sorry.

Not now, Victor, I'm busy.

A very nice painting.

How long have you had it?

Years. Do you like it?

Beauty's a cruel mistress, is it not?

Victor, please come to join us.

Hello, Arch.

Shrouded and tied, just like the old days.

What is it today? The rack?

The garrote? Or is it the old

drowning-in-crayfish trick?

You're still full of hot air, Johnny.

You're looking a bit down.

Has that old clown

been working you long hours?

You always were loyal.

There's no dog like a loyal dog.

- Watch your mouth, John.

- Look at him, boys.

Scary, ain't he?

Well, that's what four years inside

does to a man.

It eats away at his soul...

...and when it's all gone,

it makes a man quite scary.

You ever wonder how you got in there?

What grass informed on you?

Hello, Archy.

Hey, Johnny boy. Look at you.

Look at this, Dave.

Don't you look the part.

Show us your guns, Uncle Arch.

I told the boys all about it.

Don't be cheeky. Get in the car.

Give us your money.

Give us that, in the car.

Be good boys...

...because you never know

who's watching.

So who we got in there, then?

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