Romance on the High Seas Page #2

but you are 90 percent wrong.

What about the other 10 percent?

Oh, well, l'm not saying that Michael

has not looked at another woman.

Who hasn't?

l have looked at women,

and the few that looked back, l married.

That cured me of looking.

l will tell you what, l still like women,

but l stopped looking.

Well, that isn't me.

ls there a phone number

on the back? Let me see.

-A nice girl.

-l thought you'd stopped looking.

Why, l know who that is.

That's that girl in the agency.

She's quite a character.

Elvira, dear, why not forget about Michael

and take this trip yourself. Why?

And leave him here

with a free hand? Oh, no.

Don't be silly.

Even if you were here...

...if Michael wanted to play around

in a city like New York...

...with a little caution:

lf he thought l was away,

he wouldn't bother about being careful.

How l'd love to go to South America

and catch Michael here.

My dear niece, not only is it impossible,

but it cannot be done.

Uncle.

-What?

-l think l have an idea.

What--? What idea?

Get me the Baker Travel Agency,

and l wanna speak to Charles, please.

Uncle, we're going

nightclubbing tonight.

Night-- Nightclubbing?

Hello, Charles. This is Mrs. Kent.

-Uncle. Uncle.

-Yes?

This is the girl.

l hope you know what you are doing.

Waiter, have you a table for two?

Sorry, no formal dress allowed.

Why?

Makes the customers

feel uncomfortable.

Oh, makes them uncomfortable.

And how much makes them comfortable?

You rich guys think

that money can buy anything.

How right you are.

Nobody would ever suspect

you love music.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

That ought to prove l'm not rude.

We now present our singing star,

an Oscar Farrar discovery...

...trained by Oscar Farrar, and appearing

here through the courtesy of Oscar Farrar.

lncidentally, my name is Oscar--

Seems to escape me for the moment.

Miss Georgia Garrett.

Hi, baby.

Although I'm smitten

I've never written

Any poetry at all

Not even the kind

That you usually find

On a schoolhouse wall

The poems that I've composed

I could never win a cup with

After trying and trying

And trying and trying

This is what I came up with

I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love with you

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love

In love--

So she's in love.

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love

I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love

I'm in love with....

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love, I'm in love

I'm in love with you

-What was the name of that song?

-''l'm in Love.''

-Did l do right by you?

-You always do.

But all this is beneath me.

Marry me so l can quit this job.

l'm getting tired of turning you down.

Marry me and get yourself a dependent.

l'm deductible.

Oscar, you're a sweet kid,

but just a little offensive.

l always wanted to marry a girl

who could tune a piano on the side.

Once and for all,

will you marry me?

-Answer yes or no.

-No.

We'll continue this discussion later.

Will you see me home?

Hey, Georgia, a couple

of income-tax evaders...

...want you to have a drink with them.

Table seven.

l'll drink with them,

but autographs are out.

-Okay.

-Captain, did they ask for me too?

No one ever asks for you.

How did a sweet kid like you

ever get into this kind of a racket?

-Hello.

-Hello.

-Hi.

-Miss Garrett, l'm Elvira Kent.

-And this is my uncle, Lazlo Lazlo.

-Hello.

lf he isn't your uncle,

is that my business?

You can believe me, she's my niece.

l have experiences in nieces.

-Won't you sit down?

-Don't be surprised if l do.

That's cute.

We ordered champagne

if it is all right with you.

So l'm stuck with it.

Say, haven't l seen you someplace?

Baker Travel Agency.

What's more they sent me

your passport photo by mistake.

The schmoes, they sent me yours.

lt's right in my dressing room, you want it?

-There's no hurry.

-You can keep mine. l'm not going anyplace.

Well, neither am l.

Did you run out of money too?

Oh, no, no, no.

My niece cannot run out of money.

l am the owner

of one of the greatest drugstore chains.

When l came in this country

l was a soda jerker.

l was such a thin boy,

my boss was such a guy.

One mistake, l got a punch

in the nose-- No, no.

-Miss Garrett.

-Listening.

How would you like to go

to South America after all?

How would l like to go to--?

-Oh, you mean as a stowaway?

-No.

ln a first class cabin, all expenses paid,

and $ 1 000 spending money.

What radio program do you two represent,

and how did l win it?

Oh, no, nothing to do with radio

or contests or anything like that. No.

What's the catch?

There must be a catch.

There is.

You see, you have to travel

under my name.

-Under your name? You tired of it?

-No.

-You see, l'm married and--

-Oh, ashamed of it.

No.

-Miss Garrett, l don't trust my husband.

-Natch.

lf he thought l was in South America,

he'd play around quite openly--

And she would be here to catch him.

Well, why not let him play around?

Keeps them off the streets.

Please. This is a legitimate offer.

Yes, it is.

Do you mean after all these years

of planning and dreaming...

...and never getting

out of Far Rockaway...?

You mean this thing

is just gonna fall right in my lap?

Right in your laps.

Well, what am l asking questions for?

-Lady, have you got yourself a deal.

-Oh, good.

-Let's drink to that.

-Wonderful.

A votre what?

-What does that mean?

-Your health.

Mine's fine, thanks. How's yours?

-Don't pack that. l'll need that in New York.

-Beg pardon?

l mean, l won't be using it in Rio.

You can stop packing, Marie.

-Hello, darling.

-Hello.

l'll finish the merger by the end

of the week, and then l can go with you.

l said l'll be finished in a few days.

Aren't you happy?

Oh, yes, l certainly am.

lt's just that it interferes

with all my plans.

Plans? What plans?

What she means is her boat leaves

tomorrow and not in a few days, you know.

But another one leaves Saturday.

That's only 96 hours.

But-- But-- But, darling, you can't

complete a decent merger in 96 hours.

She's right.

lf you should mess up this deal...

-...you'll never forgive yourself.

-Yes, l will.

Then l'll never forgive you.

-Oh, the phone.

-Now, look, darling, this is--

Hello. Oh, hello, Georgia.

Oh, l can't talk to you now, dear,

l'm in a hurry.

-l'll see you on the boat.

-Who's this you'll see on the boat?

-George who?

-George who?

Oh, George who?

Oh, not George who...

...Georgia. Just a girlfriend of mine.

But no, darling, you stay here

and take care of your affairs.

Well, this seems

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