Roommates Page #5

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today 'cause I have an awful lot of work.

- No, no, I'm starving. - Why don't we

just do it another time? Okay? Okay?

I'm really happy for you.

I really am.

You can't catch me!

So, uh... Pittsburgh, huh?

Yeah. Isn't it great?

If you don't mind my saying,

you don't look that happy.

No, I'm thrilled. It's everything

I want. It's perfect.

Good. Settled.

Done.

That girl that, uh,

you like so much...

What's her name?

Beth.

That one.

Is she thrilled?

I don't know.

- What, she don't like Pittsburgh?

- I didn't ask.

Ohhh!

I thought it was

more serious than that.

- So what, do you expect me to ask

her to marry me? - God forbid.

You don't even like her, Rocky.

You're right.

Saying good-bye to that one

would be no problem... for me.

So what're you gonna do?

You're gonna stay in touch?

- Sure, we'll stay in touch.

- Well, that's good. That's good.

- Weekends?

- Weekends, talk on the phone...

- Holidays?

- Absolutely.

Oh, good.

That's good.

- At first.

- Huh?

Well, you're busy, she's busy.

I mean, you both work.

And these visits,

ya know, they stop.

The telephones stop.

But what the hell?

You'll both meet other people.

You can bet your ass

she will.

- To love and to cherish.

- To love and to cherish.

- Until death do us part.

- Until death do us part.

Michael, may I have the rings?

I made him chocolate milk.

Mm-mm. No way.

- What's that for?

- I know what you did.

Phooey. Young people

should get married.

Keep 'em off the streets.

Hey, Rock.

Wanna trade?

You're a very good dancer,

Mr. Holeczek.

Well, glad you think so.

Now, let me lead.

Oooh! Come on, now.

Come on!

Oh, dear. I haven't done

the polka since college.

Oh, thank you, Mr. Holeczek.

I wanted to ask you...

is there a...

a phrase that a hostess...

would say in Polish to her

guests as they're leaving?

Dupa ranei pusci.

Dupa ranei pusci.

Oh, dupa ranei pusci.

Oh, that's lovely.

What does that mean?

"Go in good health."

Go in good health.

Perfect. Dupa ranei pusci.

- Dupa ranei pusci.

- Dupa ranei pusci.

Thank you.

Dupa ranei pusci.

- Dupa ranei pusci.

- So long.

- Congratulations.

- Oh, thank you.

Dupa ranei pusci.

Oh, yeah? May your ass

sprout boils too!

Come on. Let's get outta here.

Hear what she said to me?

Oh, thanks so much for coming.

I'm glad you could be here.

You look beautiful.

- I changed my mind, that's all.

- Why?

- They need me at the bakery. - They

can get someone else at the bakery.

The communists are starting

to play decent pinochle.

They'll play against each other.

Michael, there is nothing for me

in Pittsburgh. Everything is here.

I like the apartment.

I like those boys upstairs.

I got a job. I even like

the goddamn water bed.

I'm a happy man.

Go. Be happy too.

- And you bet I will.

- Good. Settled.

Conversation over.

Good morning, Columbus. Welcome. So nice

to have you with us this morning.

Our guest today is the oldest

working baker in Columbus.

He's a master baker at

the Natural Food Emporium.

Welcome, Rocky Holez-check.

- Holeczek.

- Holeczek. Excuse me.

Now, Rocky,you've been here

three years now in Columbus.

- What brought you to our

fair city? - My grandson.

Oh, well, Rocky

has family here, then.

No more. He left.

Oh, well, I'm sure

the two of you keep in touch.

He works. I work.

Who got time?

Oh, well, then,

you really don't have any...

I'm sorry.

Did I wake you?

My grandson,

he married a local girl.

- No. You watching it again?

- Elizabeth Matthews.

Oh, well, that's wonderful. You see,

Rocky does have a connection...

But I wouldn't step in the mother's

house, you paid me.

Oh, well, when we come back,

Rocky will have some...

Can't sleep, huh?

Would it help if I cursed

at you in Polish?

We're in the kitchen with master

baker Rocky Holeczek.

Rocky, how about some tips

for our viewers?

Uh, maybe a few of those

old-world secrets.

If I gave you secrets,

they wouldn't be secrets.

Well, how about a

simple bread recipe?

Your oven's too small.

Rocky, we've only got 30 seconds.

Could you give us something here?

You're a very excitable

young man.

Eh, for the folks

at home, Rocky.

Okay. Bread.

You take a hundred

pounds of flour.

Eleven quarts of water.

And yeast.

How much?

I won't tell you.

We could go visit.

No, this is the way

he wants it.

He has his life.

We have our life.

Yes! Aha! Oh-ho!

- Wow! Good throw. Nice throw.

- That's really wonderful!

Hey, Rock, did you like that?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Not bad, not bad.

So who's up? Who's up? A guy could

get antlers waitin' for you guys.

- You're up, Rock! It's you!

- It's me?

- It's you. Yeah. You're up, Rock.

- Why didn't you say so?

Here comes the Polish hook.

- All right.

- All right, Big B, here we go.

Let's see it, Rock.

You all right, Rock?

Yeah.

- You sure? - Yeah, I'm all right.

I'm all right, sure.

Might be something I ate.

- Okay.

- Whew!

- All right. Let's see it, Rock.

- Let's go.

All right.

Here we go, babies.

Polish hook for ten.

Oh! Rocky!

Where is he now?

Back at the house?

Yeah. We're keeping

an eye on him...

to make sure he doesn't try

and sneak off to work.

Are you gonna tell him?

It's not that easy.

- He needs to know.

- He told me his wife died of cancer.

You even mention the word to him,

he gets up and walks out of the room.

- Get out of my way! Get out of my way!

- Where are you going?

I didn't say you had cancer.

I said it might be cancer.

Calling me names isn't gonna make it go

away. For that you need an operation.

- Rocky, you're coming to Pittsburgh.

- I'm not listening!

- You'll stay with me.

- My ears don't work!

- I'll do it at my hospital. I'll get the

best people. - Get out of my way!

- Everything will be taken care of.

- Son of a b*tch.

Son of a b*tch.

Whoopee!

- Rocky!

- Whoopee!

- Can we just go back in the house like

two rational people... - Get away from me!

- If it's time for me to die, I die. In the

meantime, I work. - And talk this over?

I just wanna do a biopsy. Can we just

do a biopsy? Will you just listen to me?

- You son of a b*tch!

- Will you stop... Rocky!

Hey, give me the... God!

Will you let go?

Rocky!

Get the hell out!

Who asked you to come?

Not me!

He won't even listen to me.

I'm a doctor. He has to.

I know, baby,

and you're terrific.

But your bedside manner still

leaves a little to be desired.

It's not your fault.

It's genetic.

It's open.

Oh. I thought you was

one of the communists.

Nah, a liberal Democrat.

Not a communist.

Gave my husband

a cold shower today, huh?

Yeah, well,

the hose was handy.

I didn't have a gun.

You both have

the same ugly feet.

Since when do they have

beauty contests for feet?

Do you mind if I make

myself a cup of tea?

I don't got milk.

If he sent you here to talk me into

that operation business, forget it.

Michael doesn't

know I'm here.

Personally,

I think you're old enough...

to choose a quiet exit,

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