Roxanne Page #6

Boys, boys.

Wait, boys. The ladder's up.

The ladder is up, boys.

Wait, wait, wait.

Let me show you a double binary.

Just focus with that thing there.

You'll see it, you'll see it.

I'm on a schedule.

- Oh, yeah.

- Hey, Roxanne, what's a light-year?

Same as a regular year,

only it has less calories.

What is it?

It's actually two pairs of stars

revolving around each other...

...but they're so far away

they look like one.

What keeps them together?

Mutual attraction.

That's fairly romantic.

Strange attractors in my window

of possible movement.

Say again?

Passionate kisses

I hope you'll read with your lips.

Roxanne.

Sorry.

Just something from a letter I got.

Oh, yeah?

An amazing letter.

- You liked it?

- No, I didn't like it.

- I loved it.

- Really.

- Whose letter?

- Chris.

- He can write?

- I'm melting.

Let me show you

that dumbbell nebula.

There's just something I don't get.

Here's a guy

who dodges me for days.

So I figure he's not interested...

...but C.D. Tells me

he wants to write me a letter...

...and I figure it's gonna be about

why he won't talk to me...

...but it's not.

It was strange and intelligent...

...and sexual.

Hey, wait a minute. Why is he writing?

He only lives a block and a half away.

Charlie.

What do you want me to do?

Ask him out for you?

She wants a date?

- C.D., it's all because of you.

- Hey, come on, people are gonna...

Hey, hey, what's the matter?

What's the matter?

What's the matter?

- She wants to see me tonight?

- Yeah.

I can't see her tonight.

- I'm dying already, and it's only 3:00.

- Hey, just relax.

Relax, you're all right.

Charlie, you gotta help me.

If I talk to her, I'll die.

Okay, okay, here's what we'll do.

I'll give you something to memorize

then you can just say it.

I can't memorize it.

- Of course you can.

- I can't.

No, anyone can memorize it.

Say the "Pledge of Allegiance."

You memorized that?

Come on. I got your hand.

I said...

I pledge allegiance to the flag of...

Which country?

I don't know, I'm nervous.

All right,

we're gonna think of something.

We're gonna think

of something now.

We're gonna think

of something now.

Oh, boy.

- Hi.

- Hi.

No letter this time. Just face to face.

Yeah.

- You wanna sit outside?

- Do I wanna sit outside?

Yes.

Here?

Here on the porch? Yes, yes.

- Great.

- We can sit right here.

Yeah, great.

It's a lovely evening.

Oh, yes.

It is an exquisite evening...

...filled with mysterious portents...

...magic and romance.

Why are you wearing that hat?

Why?

Well, because...

Don't panic, stay calm, stay calm.

Because tonight I am a hunter.

Because tonight, I am a hunter.

Hunting for words.

That's good. That's okay.

That's okay.

Am I your prey?

Yes, but not a defenseless one.

Yes.

But not a defenseless one.

Not a rabbit.

You are a lioness.

Alert and sensitive.

Alert and sensitive...

...to every misstep.

I see.

Get ready to move

a little closer to her.

Therefore, I must move silently.

Moving in toward you.

Reach out your hand.

My hand out reaching to...

Car 3, Car 3. Proceed to the 279.

What?

Do you confirm?

Car 3, do you confirm?

- Confirm what?

- Confirm...

Confirm my feelings.

Confirm my feelings.

Confirm my feelings.

Yes.

Because there is a heart here...

...that wants yours to know...

...that there's a possible

- Proceed to Main.

- What?

Confirm, proceed to Main.

Do you confirm?

You're not a hunter anymore?

Not a hunter?

No.

I mean, yeah.

It's...

It's really nice out, isn't it?

It's really, really, really...

What's the word I'm looking for?

Nice. Nice out.

Yeah, nice, that's it.

So now you're the weatherman?

I loved your letter.

It was beautiful.

Where'd you learn to write like that?

The usual places.

It seemed very extemporaneous.

Thank you.

Say something.

Something wonderful,

like in your letter.

- Well, let's see...

- You can tell me about the night.

- The night is very extemporaneous.

- What?

This is wild.

- Yeah.

- Yeah?

- The night is wild.

- Wild.

Like love can be wild.

Love is wild.

Wild and extemporaneous.

Yes.

Say something romantic.

Romantic.

Why do birds suddenly appear

every time you are near?

Isnt that from a song?

Well, they made it into a song.

You wrote the song?

No.

But I like that song. I like it.

You use your own words.

You...

You have a great body.

Your knockers...

Not your knockers, your breasts.

Your breasts are like melons.

Not melons. Like pillows.

Could l...?

Can I fluff your pillows, maybe?

- I have to go in now.

- Wait.

- June '85.

- What?

Weren't you

the Playmate of the Month? June '85?

Sh*t.

"Can I fluff your pillows?"

Okay, I got flustered. I panicked.

You gotta help me. She wanted me.

- It was working.

- I don't think I could after that.

Look, she wants somebody

that looks like me and talks like you.

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

- Forget it.

- No, hey, hey, come here. Come here.

- No, come here. Come on.

- Don't do it. Don't make me do it now.

Oh, no.

You stand here, under the window.

I'll be there out of sight.

I'll whisper to you what to say.

Wait, wait, wait.

- What if she hears you?

- Hey, just go. Go.

Roxanne.

No, here.

Use this.

Could you go easy

for once in your life?

Goddamn it. What in the hell

do you think you're doing?

I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Hold on.

Listen to me. I got a lot to say.

- I wanna say...

- Go away.

Roxanne, wait, wait.

I just wanna tell you that...

Tell me what? That I'm really built?

No, nothing like...

- What do I say?

- You were an idiot.

- I was an idiot, Roxanne.

- You bet you were.

Roxanne, wait. Come here.

- L...

- Wait, stop.

L... C.D., help me.

I wanna say that I was...

Yeah, I was an idiot, and you're right.

I was really...

Happy? Dizzy?

Oh, thirsty, thirsty.

This is stupid.

Stupid, stupid.

Yeah, I was stupid.

And I was also...

Tripping, tripping?

Bumbling.

I was a stupid, bumbling pointer.

- Pointer?

- No, no.

Stupid, I mean, stupid ass. Yeah.

So why'd you say those things?

Why'd I say those things?

Tell her you were afraid.

- Because I was afraid.

- Of me?

What do you mean, afraid?

You were afraid of what?

Tell her you were afraid of words.

What, what, what?

Words.

Because I was afraid of worms,

Roxanne, worms.

Worms?

- What are you saying to me?

- Come here, come.

Worm? Worm?

Did I say worms?

I meant words, Roxanne.

This is too hard. Give me your coat.

Words, words. They're all used up.

They're hard to say.

All been wasted... Give it to me.

- On the shampoo commercials,

and the ads, and the flavorings.

All those beautiful words, I mean,

how can you love a floor wax?

What?

How can you love a diaper?

How can I use

the same word about you...

...that someone else uses

about a stuffing?

I'm exploding with love for you,

and I can't use the word.

I can't hear you.

It's because my words have to rise up

and they're having trouble finding you.

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