Rumor Has It... Page #2

I'm a lawyer, I talk for a living.

You're a very good lawyer.

If you get stuck, as a last resort...

...talk about the Rams leaving L.A.

- Thank you very much.

- Here they are. Here they are.

- Daddy. Hi.

Hi, sweetheart.

- Hi. How are you?

- Great.

Daddy, this is Jeff.

The guy you've been hiding?

Earl Huttinger.

- Nice to meet you.

- What are your intentions with Sarah?

I know one thing, I'd take her to

a Rams game if they were still in L.A.

Oh, don't get me started on that.

How can a professional league...

...not have a team in the country's

second-largest market?

The St. Louis Rams? What is that?

I can't even say it.

Dad, you are allowed

to go the speed limit.

Here they come.

- The tunnels.

- You heard about them?

- Dad, can we please not...?

- On three. One, two...

All right, that's...

You guys can stop now.

Oh, come on, you guys.

What are you, like, 5 years old?

Jeff? First time in Pasadena?

- Yes, sir, it is.

- There's an old saying:

"Nobody comes from L.A.,

everybody comes to L.A.

But if you do come from Los Angeles,

then you probably come from Pasadena."

Case in point, yours truly. Not to

mention my wife and, of course, Sarah.

There's where Sarah first learned

how to ride a bike.

There's the alley that Bobby Miller

told me I was ugly.

- Jeff. Jeff.

- Yeah.

- You fly-fish?

- No, I've never got a chance to do that.

"Face like a butt," I believe,

is how he put it.

This summer, I think I'm gonna go

to Idaho and fish the Big Wood River.

- Sounds great.

- You wanna come with me?

- Both you guys?

- There's the hedge I ran away to once.

Wait. You ran away to a hedge?

Yeah, I was 12.

That's as far as I got.

She convinced herself

she was adopted.

I hear the trout up there

are as big as Buicks.

Oh, you're here, you're here,

you're here!

I'm here.

Annie, this is Jeff, my boyfriend.

Hi.

- You're cute. He's cute.

- So are you.

- He is cute.

- My God, I'm getting married tomorrow!

- To him.

- Baby, they're asking if we should...

...have a second bar out on the patio?

- Daddy?

- Yeah, I'll take care of it.

You don't wanna kill me

before you get paid.

Scott, this is my sister Sarah.

- Hi, Scott.

- And her cute boyfriend Jeff.

- How you doing?

- Good to meet you.

We can't get Sterling roses for the

centerpieces. What about pink or white?

Scott, you pick this one.

- Pink.

- Let's go with white.

White it is.

So when are you guys

getting married?

We haven't... We haven't

really talked about that yet.

But you're such a great couple.

Aren't they?

- Great couple.

- I need two strong men out here.

Sure.

Annie. How...?

Gosh, how are you feeling?

- Great, great.

- Yeah? Scared?

Scared? Of what? I mean, if I was

scared, why would I be getting married?

- Well, I mean, people get scared...

- Look at you!

Okay, do you want the bow clip

on the top or the ribbon on the bottom?

Bow clip, ribbon...

Bow clip. Bow clip. Definitely

bow clip, yeah. No, ribbon. Ribbon.

- Wow, I don't know how you do all this.

- It's fun.

Hey, I have a great idea.

Mixed doubles.

I forgot my racket,

and Jeff doesn't really...

- Come watch us play.

- We will when we settle in a bit.

- No, sooner.

- Okay.

My sister. She bounces.

- So, what was that all about?

- What?

You told your sister we've never

even talked about getting married.

We agreed to announce

after the wedding.

Yeah, announce. You make it

sound like I'm your fishing buddy.

I'm sorry.

Just don't listen to anything...

...I say for the next couple of days.

I get crazy around my family.

Sarah.

Are you getting cold feet?

- Because if you are, you can tell me.

- No, no, I'm not getting cold feet.

I have perfectly warm feet.

Just warm?

All right, they're hot.

I have very hot feet.

Yes, you do have very hot feet.

Except for that freaky

little baby toe of yours.

All right, I'm in here.

Oh, but you're down the hall to the left.

- Is that a joke?

- It's a Pasadena thing.

What, they don't have sex

in Pasadena?

A journalist.

Wouldn't your mother be proud.

Well, actually, I write the...

The wedding announcements...

...and the obituaries.

How divine.

You know, there's an old saying:

"Nobody comes from Los Angeles...

...they come to Los Angeles."

"But if you do come from Los Angeles,

then chances are you come from..."

- Pasadena?

- What, you heard it?

Hey. You're here, you're here,

you're here!

- You're gorgeous.

- Oh, Sarah, Sarah, Sarah.

- This is Nikki, she's a bridesmaid too.

- Hi.

I'm so excited. Aren't you excited?

I'm so excited I could scream.

Go ahead.

Okay, that's enough.

All limestone. I know I may

be in for a heartbreak...

...but I just can't stand

tumbled marble.

Vodka, rocks, please.

I'm sorry, but we've been asked

to tell guests...

...to refrain from smoking in the house.

- Screw you.

Grandma?

I told you never to call me that

in public.

Oh, it's so good to see you.

You look sensational, kid.

- On the hard stuff, huh?

- Oh, yeah. Well, you know:

- "When in Pasadena..."

- Good point.

- Get me an ashtray while you're at it.

- Yes, ma'am.

So how's the journalistic career?

Well...

...it's...

- You know, I still pick up...

...the paper every day to read your

obituaries. I'm thrilled I'm not in it yet.

It's nice to know I still have

loyal readers out there.

Lawyer boy? Is it working out?

That's... It's okay.

We're... Yeah, we're okay.

I guess it's...

- It's okay.

- That good, huh?

No. It's good, it's good.

We're good. It's...

- It's just...

- Come on, everybody. Dinner's ready.

- Come on.

- You'll tell me everything after dinner.

We'll be drunk then, so I'll expect dirt.

Like how he proposed to me

last week and I said yes...

...and my head has been

in a fog ever since?

Outside. Now.

I have been to Pasadena before.

I was stationed here during the war...

...at an internment camp

just down the block.

Oh, gosh. You know, don't get me

wrong, Jeff is an amazing guy.

It's just, when he asked me

to marry him...

...I didn't feel what I think

you're supposed to feel.

I just felt...

- What?

- Terrified.

- That's why you said yes?

- I don't know why.

No, I mean, I do know. L...

He's smart and he's funny and he's...

He's the best boyfriend I ever had.

That sounds awful.

No wonder you're so terrified.

No, it's me. It's me, it's all me.

And... And that.

That's Pasadena. That's what happens

when you give people everything...

...and leave them alone for 100 years.

- I just want my life to be full.

I want some adventure, you know?

And...

How did you feel before Grandpa

asked you to marry him?

I threw up.

Probably because I was pregnant

with your mother.

You were pregnant?

Is that why you married him?

Listen, kiddo...

...I am clearly not an expert on love.

And I didn't exactly love your

grandfather, God rest his pickled soul.

But we had something.

And I can tell you this...

...if you love the guy,

that's something to hang onto.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes