Rumor Has It... Page #6

It's about a hour south of the city.

San Francisco.

- Anything else I can get you?

- No.

- Sure? Eggs? Orange juice? Paramedics?

- Yeah.

Well, I guess I'd better go.

It was really nice to meet you,

Mr. Burroughs.

It was very nice meeting you,

Ms. Huttinger.

Well. Okay.

Goodbye.

I don't have a car here, do I?

Nope.

Would you...? Would you mind

giving me a...?

Sure. But let's...

Let's grab a bite to eat first.

I need to say something to you.

What you told me last night

about your life in New York...

...your job, the guy...

...suggested that it wasn't anything

to rush back to.

Well, I wouldn't necessarily say...

Look, I realize it's a bit awkward,

given, well, everything.

But last night, it was...

Last night was

pretty spectacular for me.

What I'm saying, Sarah...

What I'm trying to say, Sarah...

...is that I like you.

Very much, I suspect.

And I'd like you to stay

if you felt like you could.

Stay?

Yeah, as in not go.

- You don't like the idea.

- Well, l...

I don't... I just sort of...

- I thought we were going to eat.

- We are.

- Good morning, Mr. Burroughs.

- Good morning.

It's just a quick trip

up to the Wine Country and back.

Well, do I even have a choice

in the matter?

So, what do you think?

I think I would feel safer if that guy

was sitting up here instead of me.

You think I'm too old for you,

don't you?

No.

Then?

You've... You've slept with my mother

and my grandmother.

- What's your point?

- My point... I mean, l...

This is not normal.

I mean, you know...

You know what,

you are too old for me.

I mean, obviously

I am very confused right now...

...and last night was some sort of,

I don't know, rite of passage.

Maybe every girl in my family

has to sleep with you.

Well, I don't know if they have to,

but they certainly have.

- Beau Burroughs' office.

- Hi, this is Jeff Daly again.

- I'm sorry, who am I talking to?

- Candace.

Hi, Candace.

Listen, can you tell me where he is?

I really need to reach him.

I'm sorrY.

I can't give out that information.

I know, Candace.

You told me that before...

...but this is kind of an emergency.

I'm looking for my fiance.

She's supposed to be with him.

I haven't heard from her. I'm starting

to feel like something happened to her.

At some point I have to get back.

I know. I gotta get back myself.

I got this ball to go to.

A ball? People still go to balls?

They do to this one.

It's the biggest charity event of the year.

It's Casablanca Night.

Why don't you come with me.

- No. L... No, I can't. I can't.

- Why?

- Why?

- No, sorry.

I've got work. I've gotta go back.

You know, I can't have people

dying anonymously...

...while I'm off dancing

at some fabulous, exciting ball.

- All right. Let me make a proposal.

- Oh, boy.

Why don't you come with me tonight.

After the party, I'll fly you home.

Really. I have to be

on the East Coast anyway.

I can just stop

and drop you off in New York.

It'd be no hassle,

and you'll be there by morning.

I know this must seem nuts to you,

but life should be a little nuts.

Otherwise, it's just a bunch of

Thursdays, you know, strung together.

- You look beautiful.

- Thank you.

Okay, who else?

Okay.

You see that guy with the combover?

The one talking to the woman

with the back cleavage?

Yeah. He owns half

of downtown San Francisco...

...and the guy next to him,

he owns the other half.

Okay, how about the guy

with the George Hamilton tan?

That's George Hamilton.

No, no, you're not gonna get me there.

I don't go to the movies anymore.

It's all special effects.

All they do is blow things up.

I know. They used to make movies

about real things, about people.

- Not anymore.

- Like Chinatown.

- Yes.

- Chinatown.

- Now, that's a movie.

- Oh, I loved that movie.

I didn't understand a thing

that happened, but I loved it.

"My sister. My mother. My sister."

How about Butch CassidY

and the Sundance Kid?

- Is that a movie?

- Katharine Ross. I was in love with her.

You wanna talk

about Katharine Ross?

The Graduate.

- Was she drop-dead gorgeous or what?

- Hey, hey.

Let me tell you something about

The Graduate that very few people know.

It was Richard Dreyfuss' first movie.

He had one line:

"Shall I get the cops?

I'll get the cops."

- Yes, that's right!

- He said it to Norman Fell...

...the guy from Three's CompanY.

- That's right!

In the boarding house, right?

Come on, folks,

all money goes to charity.

Winner, eight the hard way.

Hey, Beau. Patterson's here.

If you go over and talk to him, you could

close this thing in three minutes.

- You remember Sarah Huttinger.

- Yes, hi.

- Nice to see you.

- I'm really not interested.

Three minutes. All right, three minutes.

It's 49 percent for 75 mil.

Any chance we can get

controlling interest?

No, that's a deal breaker.

- We'll see. I'm sorry...

- Go, go, go. Go. Go.

- I'll be right back.

- It's fine.

What's up?

Hi.

This your first Casablanca Night?

Yeah.

Cool.

Is that your real hair color?

- What?

- No, it's good.

I mean, you know, it's silky and shiny.

You could be a good hair model.

- Thank you.

- Sure.

- Wanna have sex?

- Excuse me?

I'm kidding. I'm kidding.

I was looking for my father.

This is supposed to be his table,

but I don't see him anywhere.

So if he comes by, tell him

that Blake was here for me, would you?

Well, who is your dad?

Beau Burroughs.

What? Wait... Wait just one... So, what...?

What are you...? What are you saying?

That Beau... That you're...

That he's... You're... That you're...

You're babbling.

I thought he didn't have any children.

He had at least one.

Champagne guy.

Okay. Okay.

Just because he's not sterile...

...does not mean

that I just had sex with my father.

Oh, God.

No, God!

- Oh, God!

- Hey, I'll bite.

What was that?

Are you okay?

Hey, Pops.

Blake. What...?

Welcome back. I thought you were

coming home next week.

No, today. I came home today.

- Sarah, this is Blake. He's my...

- This is your son.

- Right. He's in from Africa.

- No, it was Asia. I was in Asia, Dad.

Asia, right.

- We need to talk.

- I know.

- Alone.

- I know.

- We need to talk alone right now.

- Okay.

God! Blunt testicular trauma?

Come on.

You have a child! You have a son.

You are a sick man.

This isn't The Graduate,

this is Deliverance!

Calm down.

There is a simple explanation.

Is he adopted?

- No.

- Then you are a sick man.

I am a sick woman.

We have done a very sick, sick thing!

Blake is not my biological son.

My God, I'm gonna need

so much therapy.

- What did you just say?

- I said that Blake...

...is not my biological son,

nor is he adopted.

My first wife, Cynthia,

wanted to have children of her own.

I, of course, could not do that for her,

so we used an alternative method.

- A donor.

- A donor?

A donor. So technically

Blake is not my son...

...but we chose never

to tell him that.

I would appreciate

if you would do the same.

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