Rumor Has It... Page #7

Of course I won't.

But you're still sterile, right?

No, l... I lied. I made up

this whole story...

...just so that I could have sex

with my own daughter.

- All right.

- What kind of guy do you think I am?

Okay, you...

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry I called you a sick man.

You're not a sick man,

you're a very nice man.

Thank you.

And very charming.

And generous.

And smart.

And accomplished.

And a good pilot.

Very handsome.

Apology accepted.

I hope that's not your father.

Jeff, what are you doing here?

I don't know. I thought something

might have happened to you...

...but apparently

something happened to me.

No, Jeff, wait. Jeff, wait.

Jeff! Jeff, please wait. Jeff!

- What? What?

- Okay, okay. That... That wasn't...

That wasn't... I didn't kiss him.

He kissed me.

Did you sleep with him?

I didn't mean to.

I know. God, Jeff. I was so drunk.

I don't remember anything. That's not

an excuse, but it's kind of an excuse.

- Jeff, I love you.

- No! Don't say that.

Don't you say that. Now, I don't know

what game we're playing...

...but obviously this engagement

that you and I have entered into...

...has absolutely no meaning to you.

Jeff, I'm so scared.

I'm tired of scared.

No, Jeff, please.

Just please listen to me!

- What?

- I know that you hate me right now.

I hate me right now.

I'm... I'm insane.

It's like I'm possessed by this person

who's terrified and just screwed up.

I know we're good together. You're

the only person I can be myself with.

Even if I don't know

who the hell that is.

Then marry me, Sarah, right now.

Wrong answer.

- Thanks.

- Thank you.

- Sarah.

- I found Beau Burroughs.

I didn't know where else to go.

Come in, I'll put on a pot of bourbon.

And I just stood there. I just stood

there and I let Jeff walk away.

I mean, why?

Why couldn't I say yes?

- Grandma, what is wrong with me?

- There is nothing wrong with you.

- And don't call me Grandma.

- Oh, I'm such a mess.

You are not a mess.

You are a human being.

And you made a mistake.

People make mistakes.

Sometimes life is just...

Beau Burroughs!

What the hell were you thinking?

- What were you thinking?

- I wasn't thinking!

- Well, I wasn't thinking either!

- What was he thinking?

- We know what he was thinking.

- It's not his fault.

It is always his fault. Of course it is.

- He is nothing but a horny bastard.

- Oh, it's me, Grandma, it's me.

- Don't say that!

- Why not? It's the truth.

- I'll say it again. It's me.

- It is not the truth. Hello.

I have happiness staring me

right in the face, and what do I do?

I stare right back at it.

Katharine, I need some help.

Annie's hysterical.

- Annie? Why? What happened?

- She had an anxiety attack on the plane.

- And you know why?

- I don't know, why?

- What? Are you talking to me?

- I'm talking to Sarah.

Because I am my mother's daughter.

- Sarah's there?

- Sarah's there?

- Sarah's here.

- She wasn't happy.

- Your mother was happy.

- She was not happy!

She found out she was pregnant

and left the love of her life...

...to come back and have me.

- The love of her life?

- This is my fault.

- I wanna talk to Sarah!

- She wants to talk to Sarah.

- It's not your fault!

- Yes, it is my fault.

- It is not. It is not!

- Katharine.

- It is. I stole my mother's happiness.

- Katharine!

- You did not!

- I did, I did, I did, I did!

- Katharine!

Am I the only sane one here?

- I wanna see Sarah.

- She wants to see Sarah.

- Annie wants to see Sarah.

- Annie?

- Sweetheart, maybe Grandma...

- I only wanna talk to Sarah!

- She only wants to talk to Sarah!

- She wants to talk to Sarah!

She wants to talk to me?

- Hi. Annie okay?

- No. She's upstairs.

We're making her favorite soup,

tomato with crackers. Want some?

- No, I'm okay.

- I thought she was in New York.

She had a fight with Jeff

and she never got on the plane.

Two days ago I thought

I had two happy daughters.

Things are never what they seem

with the women in this family.

Annie?

It's me.

Annie. Honey.

How well did you know Mom?

What?

I can't remember her.

I was only 4.

Was she happy?

I don't know.

She always looked so happy

in pictures.

She married so young.

I always thought that, you know,

if she was happy...

...then maybe I would be.

Honey, what happened on the plane?

I just stopped breathing.

We were over the Gulf of Mexico

on the way to Belize...

...and I just stopped.

I kept thinking

that I've ruined my life...

...that I've married someone I like to

play tennis with, and that's all I'll do.

And I couldn't breathe.

I know the feeling.

Oh, God.

Annie, let me ask you a question.

When you and Scott play tennis...

...do you guys have fun?

- Yeah.

When you guys go out to dinner?

Yeah. When you watch TV?

- We like The NannY.

- NannY's funny.

Honey, sometimes I just think

it's more important...

...who we're with

than what we're doing.

And if you're gonna marry someone,

it may as well be your best friend.

Yeah, like you are with Jeff?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, I'm such a mess.

I'm the most screwed-up person

in the world.

You're not even the most

screwed-up person in this room.

Oh, really?

I spent the first night of my honeymoon

in the Houston airport under sedation.

Oh, yeah?

Well, did you sleep with a man who also

slept with Mom and Grandma Katharine?

What?

You slept with Dad?

Dad slept with Grandma Katharine?

Oh, God. No, God, come on,

even I'm not that twisted.

All right. From the beginning.

And don't leave out a thing.

No, the Xanax is for my

other granddaughter.

We're talking about Sarah here,

the one from New York.

Well, she broke up with her boyfriend.

She needs something stronger.

Fine. I'll hold.

Here. You're on hold.

Son of a b*tch.

Oh, Jesus.

Hello, Katharine.

You're looking well.

Go sh*t in your shoes.

Mrs. Richelieu, are

you trying to seduce me?

You weren't that good the first time.

How dare you? Sarah?

You couldn't stop with Jocelyn,

could you?

You almost ruined my daughter's life.

- Wait a minute, Katharine.

- Get down.

Hold on, Katharine.

Ruin her life?

What movie are you living in now,

Katharine?

I didn't pursue Jocelyn,

I don't recall inviting her to Cabo.

And I didn't pursue your granddaughter.

She managed to come 500 miles...

...up to San Francisco on her own

looking for me.

And we both know that I sure as hell

did not pursue you.

I know.

I know.

How come we've never

talked like this before?

I don't know.

I've always wanted to.

Me too.

- I love you, Annie.

- I love you too.

- Oh, my God.

- What?

- It's him.

- Who him?

- "Him" him!

- "Him" him?

Just stop. I mean, this isn't about

Sarah. And it isn't about Jocelyn, is it?

- This is about you.

- You're goddamn right it is.

You dropped me. You dropped me

for a newer model.

Do you know how old

that made me feel?

And you realize,

when you did that...

...that I was 13 years younger

than you are now.

I don't know, Katharine.

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