Sammy, the Way-Out Seal Page #2

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That's a very profound statement,

but don't you ever dare

repeat it to your mother.

- Dad, what are you doing here?

- I'm gonna use your shower.

- Ours?

- The one in there?

Mm-hm. Ours is on the fritz.

- But, but you can't!

- Why not?

Ours is fritzed too.

Oh, no. What happened?

WeII, you turn on the shower, see,

and you get it aII reguIated,

- and aII of a sudden...

- [both taIking at once]

WeII, I guess I'II just

have to take my chances.

I want to Iook respectabIe

my first morning back.

Are those the same cIothes you

guys wore back from the beach?

Yes, sir.

WeII, you be sure to give them

to your mother,

so she can put them

in the Laundromat.

The bathroom smeIIs Iike a fish barreI.

[water running]

[humming indistinctIy]

[barks]

[cIapping]

Boy, your pipes

sound worse than ours.

Maybe I'd better caII the pIumber,

give this whoIe house a going-over.

[razor humming]

[humming continues]

[barking]

- What'd you say?

- I didn't say anything, Dad.

I didn't say it either.

WeII, then I suppose

it was your mother.

She's aIways caIIing me when

I'm about to get in the shower,

or drive away in the car,

or got the baII game on TV,

or one of those charming...

HeIen!

- What is it?

- [HeIen] What?!

Honey, can it wait?

I'm trying to get in

the shower and I'm Iate.

What?

[Chet] I'm trying to

get into the shower.

WeII, hurry up, dear,

you'II be Iate.

I'm gonna be Iate? Gee,

I don't know why you shouId say that,

that's the most ridicuIous...

As a matter of fact,

I think I wiII be Iate,

I know why I'm gonna be Iate...

Arthur, Petey!

- Yes, Dad?

- What are you doing in there?

We thought we'd take

our shower, Dad,

when you and Mom were

yeIIing at each other.

Yeah, we decided we might smeII

Iike fish barreIs, too.

[stammers]

Oh, never mind.

I'II skip the shower. You can't win.

You just can't ever win.

- [exhaIes]

- [Sammy barking]

Arthur.

Arthur?

Did you caII me, Mom?

I was in the tooI shed.

Where's Petey?

I'm in the tooI shed too, Mom.

Everybody's in the tooI shed.

Everybody?

Yeah. You know.

Me and Arthur and the

wheeIbarrow and the Iawn mower.

Um, that kind of everybody.

Oh. WeII, I'm going marketing.

Think you two boys can stay out

of troubIe tiII I get back?

Oh, yes, Mom, that's one thing

I'm gonna try to stay out of.

And I'm gonna heIp him.

Good.

Be back in a coupIe of hours.

[car engine starts]

[car puIIing away]

Is she gone?

Yeah, go and get him.

[Arthur] We're on the way

over to Rocky's.

You just don't say a word, do you hear?

- Boy, I hope Rocky's home.

- Yeah.

Boy, I'm dying to hear what she says

when she first gets a Ioad of Sammy.

I don't beIieve it.

Is he reaI or is he stuffed?

[barking]

HoIy cow, he is reaI!

- Where'd you get him?

- We brought him back from the beach.

And, Rocky, you gotta swear you won't

teII anybody untiI we say it's OK.

- I swear.

- WiII you sign it in bIood?

How about naiI poIish?

I don't think it's IegaI

unIess it's in bIood.

It's OK, as Iong as she gives her word.

This is one thing we don't want our

parents to know about untiI we're ready.

- [woman] Portia!

- Is that your mother?

I thought she aIready Ieft.

- Yes, Mother?

- Ah, there you are.

Portia, I...

WeII, Petey! Ah!

- Hi, Mrs. SyIvester.

- And Arthur. [chuckIing]

Hi, Mrs. SyIvester.

Did you boys have an interesting summer?

[stammers] Oh, yes.

It was interesting aII right.

Oh, good.

Portia, I'm putting Angus

into your care.

Now I'm going downtown to see

the caterers about the party tonight.

[growIing]

Then I'm going to have

Iunch with you father.

And when the decorators come,

I don't want you and Angus underfoot.

OK, Mother.

And, darIing,

I've toId you a thousand times

not to Ieave your

doII carriages on the patio.

WeII, that's not mine,

it's Arthur's.

Oh?

Oh, weII. Good-bye, boys.

Remind your father and mother

we're expecting them tonight.

- Good-bye, Mrs. SyIvester.

- Yeah.

- [door cIoses]

- Let me see him again.

- Hi, seaI.

- [barks]

His name is Sammy.

- How come?

- It's short for saImon.

- [growIing]

- Oh, shut up, Angus.

Isn't he cute?

He's the cutest darn thing

I ever saw.

Ooh, you're so cute!

[kissing sounds]

- [Sammy barking]

- He kissed me.

He kissed me!

Boy, why do girIs go aII to

pieces when somebody kisses 'em?

Oh, Angus.

Stay!

How come you haven't

toId your parents?

WeII, uh, first we have to get

everything organized.

You know, Iike where

we're gonna keep him,

where he can swim

every day and, uh...

WouId you Iet him swim here?

- [Arthur] You mean it'd be OK?

- Sure!

I'II ask my father tonight

after the party.

Do you think he'II say yes?

WeII, if he doesn't, I'II get

a sore stomach untiI he does.

Boy, Arthur, we're practicaIIy set!

Come on, Iet's dump him

in the pooI now.

- Is there anybody eIse around?

- Just the cook.

But every time my mother's not home,

she goes to her room

and turns the TV on Ioud

and takes a nap.

[Sammy barks]

Go ahead, Sam.

Atta-boy, Sammy!

[barking]

Look at him, just Iook at him!

- Does he do tricks with a baII?

- Are you kidding?

There you go, Sam.

Look at him!

Let's go in with him!

Yeah! Go home and

get your bathing suits.

We got 'em on underneath!

[barking]

Here we come!

Hey, wait for me!

Come on, Sam!

Yee-haw!

- [Angus barking]

- Oh, Iook at that dope, Angus.

[kids Iaughing]

Oh, Angus.

[Iaughing]

Boy, are you a dumb dog, Angus.

You know you can't swim.

[barking]

- [barking]

- Go on, Sam.

- [Arthur] Throw it, Sammy.

- Catch it.

Whee!

- Come on, Sammy. Whee!

- [Rocky] Wait for me.

Here I come!

[squeaIs]

Yee-haw!

Whee!

[squeaIs]

Yee-haw!

Did you enjoy your dinner?

- [burps]

- BIess you.

Now, it's a IittIe warm tonight, Sammy.

so if you get dried off or anything,

aIIs you have to do is

puII on this handIe.

That's the idea, Sammy.

[barking]

Boy, Iook at him.

You'd think nobody ever Iearned

how to take a shower before.

Listen, Sammy, I've been taking

'em since I was four-years-oId.

Boy, what a ham.

Yeah. Better be

getting back inside.

- Arthur?

- Yeah?

Things are reaIIy working out

great, aren't they?

Yeah. A Iot better than I thought.

Rocky's gonna have a sick stomachache

untiI her father Iets us use the pooI,

and Sammy Ioves it out here

in the tooI shed.

- Things are reaIIy going great.

- Uh-huh.

WeII, since things

are working out so great,

think we ought to take a chance

on wrecking them by teIIing Dad?

- We have to. SchooI starts Monday.

- I know, but...

Look, I'm having enough troubIe

trying to pass AIgebra

without worrying about hiding

a seaI in my Iocker.

- Yeah, but maybe if...

- Petey, take it from me,

the way things are going,

Dad'II Iet us keep Sammy for sure.

There's nothing to worry about.

I'm not worried.

Did you think I was worried?

I'm not the Ieast bit worried.

- [Chet] Arthur!

- That's Dad!

- I know.

- Arthur, I'm worried.

[Chet] Petey?

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