Scooby-Doo Page #3

Eat.

It's plastic.

So what? You drink out of a toilet.

So do you.

I'm not helpless.

I am helpless. I'm gonna die!

We made it, Scoob. We're alive!

That was weird.

Fred?

Are you all right?

The last book.

I don't feel so good.

Reminds me of the time we tried to eat

that guy in the hot-dog costume.

Looks like some kind of school.

In a spooky castle ride? Fishy.

Welcome to America.

I am using the language English.

- Shaggy, look.

- Let's check it out.

Oh, boy. Lights, camera, action,

huh, Scoob?

Now that you're a young adult...

...you'll need to learn societal dos...

...and don'ts.

Interaction between young

people is polite and casual.

Hey, sorry, bro.

I will crush your bones into dust.

Let's see how the situation

should be handled.

Remember, today's young people

have a language all their own.

Sorry, bro.

No big whoop, dog.

Catch that new vid on the box?

True dat. I'm up to sniznuff

on all popular trends.

Word.

It seems to be a brainwashing

facility of some type.

Wherever there's a brainwashing cult,

there's always a power-hungry leader.

- The Papa Smurf figure.

- Mondevarious.

Then why would he have

invited us here?

Jellybeans.

I'll have whatever he's having.

Are you challenging me?

Maybe.

Pull my finger. Too late.

- You're in trouble.

- Oh, boy.

I'm not stopping

till your fur is singed off.

We're here to solve a mystery.

Yeah, Scoob.

Let's get out of here.

Zoinks! Skedaddle!

- I found a neat and scary clue.

- Us too.

This is a brainwashing

facility for an evil cult.

Maybe this is the secret relic

thingy they worship.

We'll all be relics if we don't

get out of here.

I got a plan.

What's that smell?

Sir, they found the Daemon Ritus.

For your sake, they better not

have gone far.

It is time to summon

the big muchachos.

Like, oh, no!

Mystery Inc. You all seem rather

cheery. Good news, I hope?

Mr. Mononucleosis...

- Yes?

- We have hit a clue smorgasbord.

We have three suspects

as to who's behind this evil hooty.

N' Goo Tuana. He believes

your park's on enchanted ground.

The voodoo man, who tricked me

into going to the castle.

- And you.

- Me?

Let's split up.

We'll meet in a half-hour.

I'll interview employees to see

if they've noticed anything odd.

I'll translate these inscriptions

Daphne found.

I'll go research cults on the Net.

I'm a suspect?

Don't take it personally.

It's because you creep me out.

I see.

Fine.

Jinkies.

Hey. Your friends ditch you?

No, I always did the brainwork.

What's this?

I believe it's called

the Daemon Ritus.

Daemon Ritus? What's it for?

This describes

an old race of creatures.

It's reminiscent of Pandaemonous texts,

so I can make some of it out.

It looks like instructions

to some sort of secret ritual.

It is fascinating.

On the house. Nice sweater.

You really dig doing this, huh?

Like, clues and stuff.

Certainly.

Really focusing on a mystery

reminds me of the old days.

We were quite a crew back then.

That was the best time of my life.

Shaggy and Scooby...

What goofballs!

Kind of like they are today.

And Daphne...

So beautiful. She was the coolest girl

at Coolsville High.

Fred. He was so handsome.

And he really knew how to accessorize.

Sounds perfect.

Yeah, but every family has one nut.

Scrappy-Dappy-Doo!

Ghosts don't stand a chance with me.

Let me at 'em. I'll rack 'em.

I'll sock 'em.

For the thousandth time,

there's no such thing as ghosts.

Sure there are. When I find them,

I'll give them a dose of puppy power!

Oh, God. He's peeing on me.

That little egomaniac

had flipped his lid.

Scrappy, I told you,

no urinating on Daphne.

- It was an accident.

- You were marking your territory.

You don't have the scrote for this job.

Listen up, losers.

The time has come to appoint me

your unquestioned leader.

Either that, or I'm out of here.

What's the idea? You can't do

this to me. People adore me.

I'm as cute as a Powerpuff Girl.

I'll get my own show.

Puppy power, huh?

And he wasn't even a puppy.

He had a gland disorder.

Help me! Help me!

Monsters! Monsters!

This is the most embarrassing thing

you've done...

...since you cleaned your beans

at Don Knotts' Christmas party.

How many times

do I have to tell you?

There are no such things as ghouls,

ghosts, goblins or monsters.

Now listen up. There is absolutely...

...absolutely no such thing as...

Monster!

Fred!

Scooby...

Save Daphne.

My glasses.

I can't find my glasses.

Help me find my glasses.

Here they are.

Thank you.

Nice mask.

Bad breath.

Here.

Jinkies.

Velma!

Come on!

Velma!

This is, like, the opposite

of what I wanted to do today.

Leave it!

Stand back, sir.

I'll protect you.

Mr. Mondevarious!

Daphne, go!

Scooby-Doo, where are you?

Running suitcase.

Run suitcase. Run...

Thank you.

- Where's Scooby?

- I hope he's okay.

- Right here. Scooby-Dooby-Doo!

- Hey, Scoob.

I have a sinking feeling these dudes

aren't brainwashed cult members.

What do they want with the students?

We need to follow them.

- Say what?

- Defeat them and save Fred and Velma.

Sort of like my plan: Get out of here,

let the creatures eat Fred and Velma.

No way. Fred and Velma

always figured out everything.

Now it's our turn.

For the first time, they're

the damsels in distress, not me.

- Help?

- Timber.

- Okay, I'm calling for help.

- No. I got this. I got this.

I don't got this.

- Coast Guard, Fitzgibbon.

- Hello, sir. We're on Spooky Island.

Our friends were...

...kidnapped.

We need someone here right away.

We do have a unit in the vicinity.

Can you meet them at the pier?

All right, they'll be right there.

"Our friends have been kidnapped."

- Something messed up is happening.

- Is the Coast Guard here?

What happened to the shattered windows

and busted walls?

Yo, Red. The ball.

Let's go.

Anyone else think this is strange?

- Okay, we need to split up.

- Why?

- We need to find Fred and Velma.

- I'll go this way.

And we'll go with you.

Come on, Scoob.

Fred?

Yo, the b*tch was like, "What?"

And I was like, "Later on!"

What up, dog? And...

- ...dog.

- Keeping it real.

- What happened last night?

- We got beats like it was the lizz-nizz.

- You know what I'm saying, G?

- No.

You hear that?

Get the dog.

- Damsel in distress.

- Let go of me. Help!

Hurry, get the door!

- Why is Fred in a bad mood?

- He's not in a bad mood, Scoob...

...he's a monster.

- Shaggy, bikes!

- I know, "yikes!"

No, bikes!

Scoob!

Shaggy, look out!

I just saw my friend Beth Ann.

Something's wrong with her eyes.

Like, hop on!

Like, what a drag!

Like, duck!

- Yes!

- That was great!

- Are you all right? You were great.

- You too.

- Scooby, what are you doing, man?

- Mary Jane is a man in a mask.

- Mary Jane is a man in a mask?

- Scooby.

What are you doing, man?

Step off, Scoob.

Shaggy, you're whipped.

I'm whipped? Yeah?

Why don't you say that to my face?

Okay, I will.

Your mommy eats cat poop!

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