Second Nature Page #3

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Oh my god.

Hey.

Hi.

What are you doing?

Come here.

Okay.

Just relax.

Okay.

What?

I don't know what to say.

Am I sexy to you Amanda?

Yes, of course you are.

I just wasn't expecting it okay.

Today has been really weird.

Yeah.

I shouldn't have

eaten dinner tonight.

It's probably what it is.

You look great.

That is not what it is.

Yeah look?

I'm totally pooching out.

You are not pooching out.

You just don't get it.

Actually I kinda do.

I just wish you knew

what it was like to be me.

Wait what?

You really don't

know what it's like

to be judged by your

looks every day okay.

Holy sh*t.

Holy sh*t!

Amanda the election

stress, look,

it's getting to you already.

Yeah that's,

that's probably what it is.

Hey it's

Bret, leave a message.

Hey Bret, we

should probably talk.

Call me.

This is Amanda.

Oh my god.

Ellensburg.

Back off Queen sucker!

Jesus grandma it's me!

Oh gosh!

I don't see so well.

I thought you were one of them.

What the hell are

you doing here?

Your prescription.

Oh great.

I stopped taking

that sh*t years ago.

I thought it you needed

it for your strength?

Are you calling me a wiener?

No grandma.

I got one of your yard signs

but someone stole it last night.

You've been doing

some redecorating?

You know I'd vote for

you if I lived in the city.

But you know your mom

and pop would be proud.

Thanks for saying

that grandma.

Bret says I don't

stand a chance.

Well who gives a

sh*t what he thinks?

The whole City Council

is completely behind him.

Yeah right.

They're giving him

the ole socket wrench.

Are you okay?

So don't worry.

Why do you look so worried?

I don't know.

Do I seem different to you?

I'm not really good

at this kind of crap.

You probably need to get laid.

Grandma!

Oh don't grandma me.

Now is the time to get

as much dick as you can.

Okay.

You've got a

good heart Amanda.

Thanks grandma.

Unlike some people.

Get off my damn

property a**holes!

Oh my god.

Grandma!

Hey Roger.

There you are, you're late.

Despite acting like a

drunken fool last night,

you still brought in 12,000.

12,000?

You're not gonna

wash your hands?

Wow you're the City Manager.

Focus Amanda.

What are the top

priorities of the citizens?

Well the quality and then

safety for our community.

Strengthen economies, more

sidewalks, and dog parks.

Dog parks.

If you're gonna

win the debate,

you gotta know this sh*t.

Rick!

Got it.

Thanks Ruthie.

Just Ruth.

This is my son Rick.

He's at West Point

following in my footsteps.

Oh.

Though we want

him to find a wife

and make a good home.

He also made you signs.

Hi, I'm Amanda.

It's an honor Miss Maxwell.

The signs look great,

thank you so much.

I checked out Bret

and Marge's yard signs,

but yours are better.

Marge who?

That's good.

No name recognition.

She doesn't stand a chance.

Yeah, not a chance.

So you and Ruth have

this all set then?

Oh check out the Jaguars.

Obviously I'm gonna take

your campaign photos.

Yes.

But what else do we need to do

to get you in that Mayors seat?

Well...

Oh my god, just change your

text tone to a ball and chain.

I don't know,

there's just this like,

sensitive side to him

that's really hot.

It seems a little clingy.

No, it's amazing.

It's because you haven't

tried his waffles.

Oh does he make his

own syrup for you?

Ew!

Ouch.

Is that Bret?

Mmm hmm.

You giving him the

ole socket wrench yet?

No.

Alright,

then I've got dibs.

Okay.

Bret.

You're not gonna believe this.

Just meet me where

Honker's used to be.

What the hell is happening?

Don't look so glum.

Come on, let's go.

You're going in?

Yes.

Oh no.

The world has

tipped on it's ass.

Yeah I have a theory.

Does your theory

involve my truck,

because it's missing.

Welcome to Peckers.

Two of you?

No.

Yes.

Right this way please.

Well look who it is?

Grandma!

Oh I'd do him.

Wanna go for a ride?

No.

Well sh*t sugar dick.

You probably couldn't

handle me anyway.

Ohh.

Guessing she's not

usually like that?

Right.

Okay so, what

happened last night?

Okay, sh*t.

Right so, so well,

the night started out great.

I did my usual

thing where I called

as many girls as possible.

But instead of one showing

up, four showed up.

So I'm thinking

this is pretty cool.

They're digging me

because I can put

down more drinks

than they're used to.

Then all of a sudden

one of the hot ones

leans into me and whispers,

"I wanna rip your shirt off."

And I'm like, "What

are you waiting for?"

A great moment for me.

And they're all

rubbing all over me.

Me and this other cock

blocker showed up.

And the next thing I know,

they just started

pushing us together.

No!

So that sounds just like

a regular ladies night.

No, I'm pressing charges.

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Oh my god.

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We wished for this.

I didn't wish for this.

Yes, the other

night in the backroom.

I remember the lights burst.

Oh come on.

We were arguing, you

were being a jackass.

Debatable, I remember

you were going on

about how everything

would be better

if men and women flipped.

I was thinking more equal.

Okay well would you go ahead

and magically unwish it?

Maybe I'm not

ready to go back yet.

Would you humor me and try?

Alright fine.

I wish things would go

back to the way they were.

Your heart wasn't in it.

I have no idea, I have

no idea if it worked.

Did it work?

Let's see.

What do you think of these?

Creep.

There's your answer.

Wait, why are you guys

in the storage room?

My grandma's mirror.

Yes, that's it!

That's the missing link!

Where is it?

Remember?

We were both holding it

and we're the only ones

who haven't changed.

Okay yes, and then it sparked

when we touched it to the...

Oh my god, look at this man.

I'm gonna need a

picture with him.

No I'm not gonna

take a picture.

Fine, selfie it is.

Hey handsome, hello.

You like this too much.

I love it, this

is freaking great!

I can't believe you

wanna go home so soon.

I thought I saw it.

Everything goes to Good Will

at the end of the month.

I think they came by yesterday.

Sh*t, really?

Hi, excuse me.

The girls at table 12 wanna

take a photo with you.

God, one of them tried to

grab my package last week.

If you wanna be shift lead

you gotta make sacrifices.

Okay, so she looks and

acts exactly the same.

Can we concentrate?

The mirror, can we

go to Good Will?

Yeah.

Grandma.

Hey grandma!

Grandma.

Grandma, you remember the mirror

we dug up in your time capsule?

You opened the time capsule?

We opened it remember?

It was in this thing.

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