Shallow Grave Page #7

ALEX:

(continued)

Good luck. I love that guy, but why does he have to follow us

around?

DAVID:

Anyway, what I was wanting to say was this --

BRIAN:

(unseen)

The divine Juliet. Long time no see.

Brian approaches and is standing behind their table.

JULIET:

Brian.

BRIAN:

Would you care to dance?

DAVID:

Hold on there. Who do you think you are?

BRIAN:

What?

DAVID:

Who do you think you are? You interrupted us.

BRIAN:

I'm Brian McKinley, and who are you?

DAVID:

Well, Brian McKinley, if you want to talk to my girlfriend, you

talk to me first. If you want to dance with her, then you apply

in writing three weeks in advance or you're gonna end up insode a

f***ing bin-bag. You didn't apply, so you don't dance.

Shocked and frightened, Brian backs away, then turns around to

complete his departure. Juliet restrains David with a touch as

they watch him go.

JULIET:

Do you think you could be a little more forceful next time?

DAVID:

I'm sorry.

JULIET:

It's alright. I think he got the message anyway.

DAVID:

That was stressful. I found that stressful.

ALEX:

Yeah, but you were good, you were really good. F***ing bin-bag',

I liked that. You were good. You explored your maleness to the

full there.

DAVID:

You think so?

JULIET:

Well, you certainly had a good look around.

ALEX:

You were magnificent.

INT. TOILETS. NIGHT

The gents' toilet. Brightly-lit and white-tiled. Alex walk in and

goes into a cubicle and closes the door. We hear him whistling

and laughing as he passes urine. He keeps muttering bin-bag' to

himself. Then he flushes the toilet and opens the door. As he

does so a look of surprise appears on his face as he sees someone

waiting for him.

ALEX:

Cameron! What a surprise.

As Alex is speaking Cameron's fist flies forward, hitting him in

the face and sending him flying backwards. Cameron enters the

cubicle and closes the door behind him.

INT. HALL. MORNING

Mail falls through the letter box.

INT. KITCHEN. MORNING.

Alex does not stir.

INT. HALL. MORNING

David emerges from his room, ready for his work. He looks towards

the kitchen, then walks to the door and opens it.

INT. KITCHEN. MORNING

We hear the main door closing as David leaves. Alex jolts with

energy with every sound. The telephone begins to ring. Juliet

looks at Alex expectantly, but he does not move. Eventually she

gets up and answers it.

JULIET:

Hello. Hello.

ALEX:

Who was it?

JULIET:

Don't know. No one said anything.

ALEX:

Rendered speechless with desire. I recall that feeling, from the

days when I had such a thing.

JULIET:

Are you all right?

ALEX:

No.

JULIET:

Then let's spend some money.

INT. FLAT. DAY

There follows a video depicting the results of Alex's and

Juliet's spending spree. It opens with Alex seated at the kitchen

table talking to the camera, absolutely deadpan.

ALEX:

Hello. It's been a struggle, but now the days of worry are over,

the light at the end of the tunnel has expanded into a golden

sunrise and at last, at long last, nothing will ever be the same

again.

Alex leans out and the camera foloows him as he presses the play

button on a tape recorder. The music begins.

Fast cuts follow, occasionally interrupted by out-of-focus shots

of the floor or ceiling as the camera swivels round and is

switched on and off.

Alex wearing several different suits, outfits and silk pyjamas.

Juliet wearing several different outfits.

Both of them posing with small objets d'art.

The expensive watch on Alex's wrist.

Juliet's jewellery.

Expensive toys.

Juliet takes a picture of Alex with a Polaroid camera.

Alex holds the camcorder out at arm's length in order to film

himself and turns to the camera and adjusts his tie.

ALEX:

(continued)

This is Alex Law reporting from the scene of his own life, and

you know, I'm so happy I could die.

Darkness. TV. Turned off.

INT. LIVING ROOM. DAY

The music has stopped.

David presses the eject button and lifts the video from the

player.

Alex and Juliet are seated on the sofa, surrounded by their

acquisitions, and are evidently a little embarrassed. Juliet is

holding the Polaroid of Alex.

DAVID:

I think we ought to scrub this, don't you?

David reinserts the tape and presses record.

ALEX:

Will you calm down.

JULIET:

Yeah, you're making us all nervous.

David picks up the Polaroid of Alex and throws it down, then

picks up a vase.

DAVID:

How much did you pay?

ALEX:

I don't know.

DAVID:

How much did you pay?

ALEX:

I don't know.

DAVID:

How much?

ALEX:

I don't know.

JULIET:

Two hundred.

DAVID:

Two hundred pounds?

JULIET:

Two hundred pounds.

DAVID:

You paid two hundred pounds for this?

JULIET:

That's what it cost, David.

DAVID:

No, no, no. That's what you paid for it. Two hundred pounds is

what you paid for it. We don't know what it cost us yet, for you

two to have a good time, we don't know the cost of that yet.

From out in the hall, the phone starts to ring. Nobody moves.

INT. DAVID'S ROOM. NIGHT

David lies awake in his bed.

INT. A FLAT HALLWAY. NIGHT

Hearing the noise, David sits up in bed, then gets out, reaching

for his clothes.

INT. STAIRWELL. NIGHT

David looks down the stairwell. Other neighbours, in nightclothes

or hurriedly dressed, are standing at the open door of the flat

below. David descends the the stairs and looks into the hall of

the other flat where the occupant, an Elderly Woman, lies

groaning on the floor.

A hand on David's shoulder pushes him out of the way and two

uniformed policemen walk past, followed by an ambulance man

carrying a stretcher.

DAVID:

Did they take anything? Did they take anything?

No one acknowledges his question or answers it.

The ambulance men emerge carrying the woman, her face bruised and

cut. Everyone else begins to melt away.

INT. STAIRWELL. NIGHT

David stands alone on the darkened stairwell.

INT. DAVID'S ROOM. NIGHT

David lies awake in his bed.

INT. DOOR OF THE FLAT. DAY

Someone attempts to open the door but cannot because there are

two new security chains on the inside. The door is forced against

the chains with no success and Alex calls from the other side.

ALEX:

What is this? What is going on? David!

David approaches the door.

DAVID:

I'll let you in.

David closes the door and looks through a new spyhole to see Alex

grinning at him while he releases the chains and then opens the

door again. Alex walks in.

ALEX:

What is this?

DAVID:

Security.

DAVID:

From what? Jehovah's Witnesses?

DAVID:

There was a break-in.

ALEX:

Downstairs, I know. Pensioner's terror ordeal: page six.

Alex hands David a rolled-up newspaper.

DAVID:

Doesn't it worry you?

ALEX:

No, it doesn't. I tried to let it worry me but it won't. I've

worked on that paper for three years. There is a pensioner's

terror ordeal on page six every day. Every day. Maybe when I'm a

pensioner it'll worry me.

Alex notices some more tools and the stepladder leading up to the

trapdoor.

ALEX:

(continued)

What's all this for, more security?

DAVID:

I fitted a lock up there. On the inside.

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