Shrek Forever After: The Final Chapter Page #5

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You know of her curse?

By day, one way, by night another.

This shall be the norm.

Until you find true love's first kiss...

...and then take love's true form.

You even know the little rhyme!

It is true! You are the one!

You must prove it to her!

- How?

- Convince her!

Go to her when she is alone

and tell her something

that only her true love would know.

Know about what?!

Whoa! That's a whole lot of kitty!

Shrek, can we keep him?

Excuse me. Coming through!

Pardon me, guys! Watch your back.

Look, Donkey,

the chimichanga cart! Quick!

ndale! After him, burro!

Donkey, vmonos!

Man, you are a cat-astrophe!

And you are ri-donkey-lous!

I'll scout ahead. Wait for my signal.

Secure your positions!

- It's quite a view from up here.

- What are you doing?!

Get back in position!

You need to know,

once and for all, who I really am.

You are going to ruin everything!

Ruin everything?

Actually, I'm gonna fix everything...

The ogres, Rumpel, your curse.

How do you know about my curse?!

OK, OK, please, Fiona...

Just hear me out.

I can explain everything.

- Where's Fiona's signal?

- What's she waiting for?

- He's going to get away!

- No, he's not.

Listen, I don't know who you are

or how you know about my curse,

but if any of these ogres

find out I'm...

- A beautiful princess?

- That is not who I am! Not anymore.

- Look, I know you're upset.

- You don't know anything about me.

I know everything about you.

I know you sing so beautifully

that birds explode.

- Big deal.

- I know that when you sign your name,

- you put a heart over the "I".

- So what?

I know that when

you see a shooting star,

you cross your fingers on both hands,

squinch up your nose

and you make a wish.

I know that you don't like the covers

wrapped around your feet,

and I know that you sleep by candlelight

because every time

you close your eyes...

...you're afraid you're gonna

wake up back in that tower.

But, most importantly, Fiona...

...I know that the reason

you turn human every day...

...is because you've

never been kissed...

...well...

...by me.

- You move fast.

- It's not me doing the moving.

- Why is this happening?!

- Love?

- No, I'm being forced to dance!

- By love!

No, I can't stop myself!

Please! Make it stop!

I can't control myself!

Yeah! Cookie's bringing

the heat out of the kitchen!

Oh, no! It's the Piper!

I can't believe I let this happen,

and it's all because of you!

- If you'd just let me kiss you!

- What? You're insane!

We must do something before

they fandango themselves into oblivion!

- What can we do?

- First, you must stop dancing!

When somebody tooties that fluty,

I got to shake my booty!

Then it's up to me!

Hurry! We must get them

away from the music!

Puss and Donkey to the rescue!

We saved the day!

Donkey... Can I borrow your tongue?

Say what?!

No. Hell...

I don't care how big your eyes get,

player, it's not going down.

All right!

Stop!

- Where are you going?

- To save my friends.

- How, by getting yourself killed?

- If that's what it takes.

Puss, say something.

- Puss?

- Let me explain.

That's how you knew so much about me.

- Fiona, wait! Kiss me.

- What?

It's the only way to save your friends.

Get out of my way.

You used to believe that a single kiss

could solve everything!

I don't understand.

This doesn't make any sense.

True love's kiss

was supposed to fix everything!

Yeah, you know,

that's what they told me, too.

True love didn't get me

out of that tower.

I did. I saved myself.

Don't you get it?

It's all just a big fairy tale.

Fiona, don't say that. It does exist!

How would you know?

Did you grow up locked away

in a dragon's keep?

Did you live all alone

in a miserable tower?

Did you cry yourself

to sleep every night,

waiting for a true love

that never came?!

But... But I'm your true love.

Then where were you

when I needed you?

Maybe you kissed her wrong?

No.

The kiss didn't work...

...because Fiona doesn't love me.

Don't despair, fellow ogres!

They can put us in cages,

but they can't cage our honour!

Shrek and Fiona are together?!

Yeah, I've heard enough of

your toot-a-lee-toots! You blew it!

Wolfie! My speech wig.

Baba! Ready my makeup.

And Piper, pull my socks up.

- Tight.

- Attention, citizens.

Please stay tuned for a message

from our tyrannical dictator!

Hello, people.

It is I, Rumpelstiltskin...

...shepherd of your dreams.

Recently, a certain somebody

has jeopardized our joyous lives.

And that somebody

is the rat-munching ogre called Shrek!

That is why I come to you,

dear citizens.

For whomever brings me this ogre,

shall receive the deal of a lifetime.

Just think of it! Total and

- complete happiness.

- Ya!

Dazzling, radiant fulfilment!

All your greatest wishes.

- Yeah!

- Your wildest dreams.

Anything you could ever want!

No strings attached!

But hurry, this is a limited time offer.

So light your torches, sharpen

your pitchforks and get your mob on!

Shrek! Shrek! Shrek!

Go back where you came from!

It seems that we are safe.

Yeah, it looks a lot less pitchforky

and torchy out there. Let's go.

What's the point?

The kiss didn't work. It's over.

Look, Shrek, I know things

might seem a little bleak right now,

but things always work themselves

out in the end, you'll see.

- I bet by this time tomorrow...

- Don't you understand?

There is no tomorrow.

There's no day after that, and there's

no day after that day after that!

My life was perfect

and I'm never going to get it back!

If your life was so perfect, why'd you

sign it away to Rumpelstiltskin?

Because I didn't know

what I had until it was gone! All right?

I didn't know what I had.

Surrender now! I'm taking you in!

Don't try to fight it, ogre!

The reward is mine!

Gingy?

- You unhand me, green devil!

- What are you doing?

Collecting my bounty!

- Bounty?

- What are you talking about, cracker?

Rumpelstiltskin promised

the deal of a lifetime

- for whoever could bring you in.

- Deal of a lifetime?

Where all your wishes come true.

Wait a minute.

- I can still fix this.

- How you gonna do that?

You know what? I'm gonna give

Rumpelstiltskin exactly what he wants.

OK, Gingy, tell me about this...

Were you going to eat that?

Not Shrek. That is not Shrek.

Also not Shrek.

That's not even an ogre,

it is a troll! Nice try.

- And that...

- Roar.

...is just sad.

And what is that supposed to be?

I'm just a frightened old man.

Don't listen to him!

These ogres are crafty!

That is your father painted green.

No, it's Shrek! Honest!

Take them away!

Can no one bring me Shrek?!

Where is he?

How hard can it be?!

I want him! I want him! I want him!

Stiltskin!

I hear you're looking for me.

All right! Finally!

Who turned him in?

Who gets the deal of a lifetime?

- I do.

- What? But...

If I'm turning myself in,

I get the deal of a lifetime.

That means you have

to give me anything I want.

No! Only true love's kiss

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