Shrink Page #5

It's not that...

It's not that serious, I don't think.

I got to go to the grocery store.

I'll see you later.

All right.

Drive safe.

Wow.

Hey.

Once again we meet.

Nice cart.

Just wanted ice cream.

I would love ice cream, too.

Have some.

No, I can't, apparently, 'cause l...

I'll get fat or something.

That's f***ed up.

I worked in an ice cream shop

in high school in Warren, Ohio.

Did you?

Banana split sundaes.

I make a mean Black and White.

So, Miss Amberson,

did you always want to be

Miss Ice Cream of Warren, Ohio?

Or did you always want to be

one of Tinseltown's brightest stars?

I pretty much always wanted to act.

I guess dreams do come true.

Yeah, but I still ended up

in your office, didn't I?

So, what about you?

Where did you grow up?

Me, I grew up here.

Did you always want to be a therapist?

I don't even know anymore.

That is ancient history.

You're not that old, you know.

Neither are you.

I am in this town.

Well, like I said, f*** 'em.

Daisy? Daisy?

This f***ing asteroid script,

could that really happen?

Yeah, they have the money.

- Hedge fund financing, I think.

- No, no, no.

I mean an asteroid hitting the Earth.

Yeah, I think so.

Any day it could happen?

Or in 100,000 years?

Or what?

I don't know.

F***ing find out, all right?

Do we have a guy at NASA?

Just... F***.

We need a guy at NASA.

Are you high?

No, I'm not.

It's walrus tusk.

It's totally medicinal.

I got a guy in Little Antarctica.

Hey, did you check my dome supply?

You make sure all

the expiration dates are right?

No lambskin?

No, you're all set.

All right. All right.

I'm going to go back in and gorilla pimp

that girl from the Carl's Jr. ads.

Sleep tight.

- You're a really good writer.

- Thank you.

That's good news because

I am a piece of sh*t valet.

Okay, I have bad news.

What?

They basically made

a bad version of the script,

and it's coming out next summer.

What? Really?

How is that possible?

Mine takes place in an alternate reality.

I know.

Yours is better, but...

I don't know. I think maybe you should

work on something new.

Excuse me.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

Okay.

You want to get a drink

this weekend or something?

Baby on board.

Right. Sh*t.

Sorry, I'm an idiot.

Who's the father?

Oh, God.

That's so long.

You know what?

I have to go to this thing.

It's going to really suck,

but if you want, you could join me.

- It's not going to be fun.

- Yeah, I'll go.

- You could? Okay.

- Yeah.

I'm glad we're finally meeting.

Shamus is sweet.

So you were in that vampire movie?

Yeah.

- Did you see it?

- I didn't.

You were in a couple of other indies

and that American Apparel ad.

And you're, what, 19?

Street legal.

I'm just f***ing him, by the way.

You're just f***ing him?

Yep.

Do you have any idea who I am?

I wouldn't be here if I didn't.

You know this information

will probably get back to him, right?

Stop!

Stop right there!

You're dead, Stitch!

You know what your problem is,

Ramirez, you piece of sh*t?

What's that?

Me.

- The f***ing gun's jammed again.

- That's a cut.

- Come on, man!

- God damn it.

Can we get Shamus a real gun?

- Hey, Shamus!

- Right here, Shamus!

Hey!

- Hi.

- Hi.

You made it.

Do you like it?

Yeah, it's cool.

Can I get you a cocktail?

Pregnant.

- What?

- I'm still pregnant.

Right. Sorry.

Look, I want to tell you something.

Okay.

I know we're just getting

to know each other

and we really don't know

where this is going,

but I just really feel like

I should tell you this.

- I like you.

- I'm sorry?

I really like you

and I don't have

any money or insurance

or a valid credit card

or any of those things,

but I'll help you take care of this baby.

I will do whatever it takes.

I will step up big time.

I like you, too.

Cool.

Do you want to go make out in your car?

- Yeah.

- Really?

No, I don't have a car.

I don't have a car.

You know what?

I have a car.

- Yes!

- Okay.

Wait, wait, wait.

We should get a condom.

No, no.

I'm already pregnant.

God, I can't.

Wait. No, no, no.

You're pregnant.

What are we doing?

No, it's fine. Don't stop.

- Sh*t!

- Is everything okay?

Yeah. Sorry.

We were just leaving.

Little King? Sh*t.

Get the f*** out!

I was just thinking about you.

What's going on, brother?

How you doing?

- I'm good. How are you?

- It's so good to see you.

Did Youngblood over here

knock you up, little lady?

No, man.

It's not mine.

It's not even mine.

It's not?

No. It's... It's my sister's.

It's a surrogate.

I'm a surrogate.

She couldn't get pregnant, so...

I can't say no.

It's probably why I work for Patrick, so...

- You're serious?

- Yeah. Yeah, I'm sorry.

It's not even my egg.

It's just... It's just my oven.

- Wow.

- So to speak.

- That's crazy.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

- Thank God.

Are you guys good friends?

You didn't have to do this.

I didn't want you to have to ride the bus.

Jemma Brown?

You want me to go with you?

- I'll be okay.

- Okay.

Hey, it's me.

Hold on a second.

- You okay?

- Yeah, I'm fine. Hold on a second.

- What are you doing? You okay?

- I'm fine.

- Were you getting high?

- What? No.

- You weren't?

- No.

- Really?

- Yes.

Well, some people might see

getting high in a pediatrician's office

as a cry for help.

She's not my kid.

But you probably knew that.

Let's go.

What'd you think?

I want to make movies.

You do?

My mom used to take me to the movies.

That was our thing.

I kept all the tickets.

I tape them to my ceiling.

Maybe we could do this every week.

I mean go to the movies

instead of talking.

You have no idea how tempting that is,

but I'm afraid we're gonna have to talk.

I knew you were gonna say that.

Hey!

I see you!

This place is a fortress, motherf***er.

What the f*** are you trying to pull?

That's right, you better run,

you motherf***er.

That's from Ed Armstrong at Orion.

You don't even know how f***ed you are.

You're not gonna be able to see a movie

in this goddamn town when l...

Daisy.

Okay.

Hello?

Evan?

It's for you.

Yo, this is Evan.

What's up?

We should do this every night.

We should start a band.

We should start a band.

What would our band be called?

Let's think.

The Neurotics.

The Neurotics.

I love it.

It's my fault.

I should've seen it coming.

I mean, all the friends we had are gone.

I just have patients now.

Well, you still have a step-godbrother.

Who wants to be my patient?

Jesus Christ Almighty,

your face looks like

a truck driver's nutsack.

Thanks, Dad.

It was a long night.

Yeah, I bet.

Been thinking about your dream.

I thought you didn't do dreams.

No, I don't.

But in your case...

"It's a comfort for seafarers to know

"that no matter on what strange water

they may venture,

"there are always pilots within call.

But yet the sufferer must help himself."

That's Kierkegaard.

Love his work.

Hey.

I saw you at the movie.

Yeah, so?

Do you maybe want to have

a cup of coffee or something?

Why?

I think we might have a lot in common.

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