Sidewalks of New York Page #2

Oh, really. You sure?

They've got a great selection

of other-

Yeah, I know,

but I gotta see this one.

Okay.

There's nothing I can do

to change your mind, then?

Okay. Well, I tried.

Yeah, yeah.

Enjoy your movie.

It's a great movie.

- All right.

- Good night.

Excuse me.

- How you doin'?

- Hi.

I was thinkin', if you want

the video that badly...

...why don't you give me

your phone number?

When I finish

watching it tonight...

I could give you a call

and then maybe bring it over.

No, I don't want to see it

that badly, thank you.

Okay, it seemed like back there

there was some sort of emergency...

...like you needed to

see it tonight or somethin'.

Now you got me feeling like

I'm some kind of sh*t heel.

Like I should've given you

the video back there...

...like it would've been

the gentlemanly thing to do.

Well, it would've been,

but you missed your opportunity.

Then why don't you let me

make it up to you?

Why don't we go in here

and get a cup of coffee?

We could talk and-

Am I coming on too strong?

I just was thinking,

we could get some coffee-

Okay, how about this?

In exchange for the video now,

I'll give you my phone number.

If you call me later this week,

we'll do coffee then.

But how do I know that you'll

give me the right number?

We are making a deal here.

You're either in or you're out.

I'm in.

Return it on time, so I don't

have to pay the hefty late fee.

You don't know his name,

what he does for a living.

You don't know where he lives.

But you gave him your phone number.

Look, he seems

like a nice enough guy.

We just kinda skipped

the personal stuff.

You are supposed to start

with the personal stuff.

Where do you live?

What do you do for a living?

Like a basic background check.

What if this guy calls you?

You don't know him.

He could be a sexual deviant.

I don't know- Something.

He was renting

Breakfast at Tiffany's.

Hardly the kind of movie the

neighborhood perv would get off on.

Breakfast at Tiffany's.

Okay, well, he's gay.

Did I tell you the ratio between

single, straight, employed men...

...and single, straight women

in this town?

- Yes, many times.

- I did, right?

Okay. So don't get your panties

in a bunch over this guy.

I bet he'd rather redecorate

your apartment than, you know-

Than what?

Than take care of his manly

obligations, that's what.

My name is Maria Tedesco,

and my age is none of your business.

I don't even think

I should be doing this.

All right.

I'm originally

from Staten Island.

Now I live in Manhattan,

which I hate. I'm a teacher.

I'm here, PS-3.

Sixth-graders make more in weekly

allowance than I do in a month.

But I love the sons of b*tches,

so it makes it all worth it.

Maria, it's me, Benjamin.

Can I talk to you?

I'm listening.

I was in the neighborhood,

thought I'd come by, say hello.

This is a really bad habit

you're developing, Benjamin.

Yeah, but I've really been waiting

to see you for a while.

I thought maybe this time

you'd let me in.

I miss you very much.

Let me in. We'll talk.

I promise I won't try anything.

I promise, okay? Please?

I'm Benjamin Basner.

I'm 24 years old,

and I'm from Brooklyn.

My sex life?

- At this point, it's nonexistent.

- Hey, you suck!

At this point,

it's just totally-

Should we start again?

Why do you use the excuse that

you were just in the neighborhood?

- I was!

- You live three blocks away.

- You're always in the neighborhood.

- But I wrote you a song.

I thought that maybe

you want to hear it.

No, see, 'cause I've heard

enough of your songs already.

Don't say that.

I just miss you very much.

- Is that so bad?

- No, it's not bad.

But it's been over a year.

You need to get over it.

You don't understand.

I can't get over it.

I can't live without you,

really. I can't.

I want you to look at me.

Take a good look, okay?

I have gained 15 pounds

since the divorce.

- Fifteen. Okay?

- Yes.

We should consider getting

back together, for my health.

Why the sudden change of heart

after a year, huh?

I'm finally okay, now you want to

play with my emotions again?

I'm not playing with anything.

I just recently realized

we had a beautiful marriage...

- And I was eating well.

- What?

I didn't have the foresight

to see how great it was.

What? We fought all the time.

We made each other miserable.

We stopped having sex.

You started cheating on me!

- What was so beautiful about that?

- So we had some ups and downs.

- We also had some very good times.

- Name one.

- You want me to name one?

- Yes.

July 4th weekend in '97.

That was nice,

but they were few and far between.

What about that time during

my junior year of college...

...when we went skiing?

You mean the time when you twisted

your ankle in the parking lot...

...before we got to the mountain,

and had to spend the week in bed?

But we had a damn good time

in that bed.

My jaw is still a little sore,

if you know what I mean.

That was a really long time ago.

Wouldn't it be nice to spend

some time together again?

Let's get in the bed,

and we'll talk.

We'll talk?

I'm sure if you let me have a word

with your friend down there...

I could convince her

that we should work things out.

I almost had you there,

didn't I?

Come on.

Look, Benjamin...

...you wanted a divorce,

and you got it.

You gotta let me get on

with my life. It's only fair.

- I f***ed it up, didn't I?

- Big time.

All right. I'm sorry.

- Good night.

- Good night.

- Did you ever cheat on Maria?

- Yeah, I cheated on Maria.

But it wasn't really my fault.

She was the first and only woman

that I had ever had sex with.

Besides,

we were way too young-

...way too young to get married.

Especially me.

I could never see myself...

...never having sex

with another woman.

It's crazy. Not that I didn't

love Maria. I still love Maria.

But I walked down the street wanting

to have sex with every woman I saw.

Eventually I tried to.

Why would you even

go see her again?

- I miss her very much.

- You don't. You're just horny.

When was the last time

you got laid?

I don't know.

Like a month or so.

A month or so?

Yeah, it was like October

or November.

You know what? It's March.

That's four months.

You got a semen buildup.

It's clouding your judgment.

Go out, find yourself someone,

you get laid.

I guarantee you, one week

in a new relationship...

...you're gonna forget

all about Maria...

...again.

Remember why you got divorced?

- I cheated on her.

- You cheated on her because what?

You were miserable

and too young to get married.

Dude, we're gonna be rock stars.

We got no time for wives.

We're gonna have scores of groupies

to do whatever we want.

Right? Listen.

If you're horny, get a hooker.

No, see, that's for you.

- I couldn't do that.

- What's wrong with a hooker?

I don't want it on my rsum.

I don't wanna have kids,

and have the kids find out...

...that their father

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes