Simon Sez Page #3

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Watch your head.

- They're right on our ass!

- I know! Just get down!

Stay down! They're firing!

Why did you gag her?

She wouldn't shut up!

A potato! A damn potato?!

I tried grapes,

but she kept eating them!

Thank God she's

not in the trunk!

Excuse us! Major gun battle

coming through here!

Do you see that freaking bus?!

I see it! Lean left!

I love this car, man!

They're like my college loan officers!

They keep coming!

Maybe he wants some Grey Poupon!

Just shut up and lean right!

You got the bulletproof bottom

option on there?

Enough tilting! You got

a cloaking device on this?

Nice talking to you!

Put your seat belt on!

Now you're worried about safety?

It doesn't work!

You see that cliff?

I see it!

- Which way should I lean?

- Don't lean. Hold on!

Oh, my God!

This is not happening!

Sh*t! Sh*t! Sh*t!

Can't you get a ticket for this?

Don't move!

Don't shake the car!

I'm afraid of heights!

I can see my house.

The red one?!

Caucasians!

I work for your dad.

We've rescued you.

You what?!

From your kidnappers.

We've rescued you!

What are you talking about?

The people holding you for ransom.

What people?!

I don't know!

The woman at the winery!

Are you insane? She works for my

boyfriend's father, you idiot!

- What's his name?

- Who?

Your boyfriend's father.

Bernard Gabrielli.

Who the hell are you?

What's she talking about?

She was kidnapped! You were there!

You're right. I was kidnapped.

- There, you see!

- By you two freaks!

Everything is under control.

She's safe. She's right here.

Thank God. Put her on.

Daddy?

Honey, it's okay.

You're safe now.

You're amazing!

What are you talking about?

I know you don't approve of Michael,

but I love him!

What's this got to do with Michael?

I can't believe you'd go this far

to keep us from being together!

She's suffering from what we like

to call "post-traumatic stress."

- What should I do with her?

- Just take her to the hotel.

I'll be there in the morning.

He wants me to bring her

to the hotel.

Good. Do you think you

can handle that?

I'll need the disk to take to Fence.

It stays here. If Gabrielli would

trade her life for it...

...I want to know why.

Michael's father was going

to kill me over computer software?

Here's everything you wanted to know

about Bernard Gabrielli.

The guy's sort of a populist hero.

He's an old-style don who leads

a bunch of fanatics...

...trying to get France out of Corsica.

Cute. Pictures of Chelsea Clinton.

Give me that!

Why would a guy like Gabrielli

need guidance software?

- Ashton's man was at the winery.

- Sampling Beaujolais?

Ashton and Gabrielli

have to be doing a deal.

If Ashton is doing a deal,

we'll know about it.

We're all over that guy!

He won't cough

without us giving him a cough drop!

Or sneeze

without us handing him a Kleenex!

Because we're

the doctors of surveillance!

And the doctors are in the house!

- We in the house!

- Yes, doctor!

Doctor, check my pulse.

I've had a lot of anxiety at work.

I don't feel appreciated.

Take a pizza

and call me in the morning.

You have the cure. Yes, you do.

The doctor's in the house.

Colonel, do us all a favour

and turn that frown upside down.

You're about to become

a very rich man.

And by the looks of your overhead,

you'll need it.

Let's get this over with!

What's the rush?

You act like this is your first time.

Relax. Enjoy.

Breathe in the mountain air.

Did you bring the money?

Of course I did. Didn't I just say

you're about to become very rich?

What do you think is in the bag?

Jellybeans?

Don't you trust me?

No.

I'm so excited!

This is like Christmas mornings

back at the orphanage.

I think I'm going to cry.

Colonel, you're the tops

of the pops.

Don't ever contact me again.

Don't turn your back on me.

Impressed?

Of course I'd never

do anything like this to you.

We're buddies.

Isn't that right, buddy?

- Yes.

- Good.

Now I want you to feel free to jump in

if I get any of this wrong.

You don't have the disk

and you don't have the girl.

Shame. I was so hoping

you'd jump in.

I did everything I could

to get you the disk.

Neither of us counted on

the Interpol agent.

Let me take care of Simon.

You just tell me where Michael is.

Why do you keep

threatening me with Michael?

I'm only interested in Michael

because he'll lead me to the girl.

Hear me. And hear me well.

If you dare harm him...

He won't be harmed unless you

insist upon making me find him myself!

An accidental explosion at this

abandoned army complex killed 12 men.

Possibly connected to the incident

is a missing weapon...

...and the man who developed

that weapon, Colonel Jacques Telore.

- Find out what weapon is missing.

- Where are you going?

Date.

Give it a rest, Julius.

My neck's getting tired.

What the hell are you doing here?

I bought you flowers, baby.

You look great.

Really? Want to come in?

- Can I?

- No.

Oh, sh*t!

I thought we'd get some dinner.

Bullshit! It's 3 in the morning.

What do you want?

We can talk about your boss.

Ex-boss. He fired me

after you gave me that phony CD.

Puff Daddy? That was low.

Even for you.

I was just doing my job.

And I was just doing mine!

That was a $2000 gown!

You look better without it.

I'm done.

You wanna keep fighting?

Go ahead.

You really mean that?

Thanks!

I see.

You want to kill me?

First, tell me why

Gabrielli wants military software.

I really miss this.

I miss it too.

- Tell me about Gabrielli.

- Later.

Later?

Right now, I want to work out.

Lord, we beseech Thine forgiveness

for being wretched sinners.

We want to go

on the straight and narrow.

Straight and narrow.

Know that the proceeds from today will

go straight to the orphanage.

And which orphanage would that be?

The one on 678910 Avenue.

That's a very poor orphanage.

Very poor.

God bless us. I call.

I call too.

Straight! Ten high.

Where's your Messiah now, boys?

Judas, before you get too happy,

I think you better look at this. Bam!

Shouldn't you be

caring for the girl?

This is true.

Go, go, go!

Shame you're out of chips.

- She's still in the bathroom.

- Go check on her.

Enough fooling. Come out.

You been in there for two hours.

Nice enough fellow, but a real sucker.

Come on! Damn it, Claire!

Open the damn door!

Sh*t!

Oh, sh*t!

This whole thing's my father's fault.

What do you mean?

He doesn't want us to be together.

He told a lie

about your father kidnapping me...

My father?

Let's get out of here!

Stop! Let go of me!

Want some?

Tell me about Gabrielli.

I was wondering when

you'd get to that.

You must have

bigger fish to fry.

Whatever you think,

he's a guy with a good heart...

...who's trying

to protect his son.

Who's he trying to get

the software for? Ashton?

If you know the answers, why are you

asking me the questions?

Because I don't have the proof.

Sorry.

You want the good news

or the bad news?

The bad news.

The weapon?

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