Slap Shot Page #3

- Watch Braden. He's gonna do somethin'.

- Hi.

- Are you guys brothers?

- Are you guys brothers!

- What a life.

- OK, bets on the trip, men.

Walt has entrusted me with

our ETA in Lancaster, $5 limit.

OK. I'm ready to take estimates

from the membership.

Walt is the leading contender

for the outdoor record,

Charlestown-Lancaster.

All aboard, son. Let's go, Walt.

Where are the new boys?

Oh, son. There are your brothers.

- Why is the f***in' old man on this trip?

- I don't know.

I'm expecting great things from you.

Walt, you didn't tell me you were

holding out on your old bookmaker.

Ooh, and it's all right,

and it's comin' on

We gotta get right back

to where we started from

Love is good...

- Who opened?

- On the stick. Let's go, Denis.

Two dollars.

Two bucks. I'll call.

- Fold.

- Let's see.

Two and sixes.

- Hey, that's nice.

- I'm out.

- Kings over.

- F***.

- I lose my blouse.

- Shirt. Your shirt.

Sh*t.

Denis, mon ami, if you sign your contract

over to me, I'll prorate your losses.

Jesus, Braden. You would, wouldn't you?

My ambition is to win all your contracts,

own this club and run it my way.

- I'd make a fortune.

- Yeah.

Compulsory fashion shows

every afternoon.

- Radiothons twice a week.

- Recycled jockstraps.

- Who owns the club, anyway?

- I don't know.

You don't know?

What do you mean?

A corporation owns it.

- Who cares? You get your cheques.

- That's the spirit, Reg. That's it.

Hey, pot's light. Come on. Who's in?

What's the game?

Same game. Jacks or better, progressive.

Nothing wild, right?

Though it's onlyjust begun

You give me yourlove...

-..for two to gorgeous Honolulu!

- Oh, my God!

You'll be staying at the all-new

Leisure lnn in downtown Waikiki...

Hey, Drouin. Change the channel!

Changez la canal.

Jean-Guy, leave it. Touche pas.

- Shittiest rink in the f***in' league.

- That ice is a goddamn disgrace.

You oughta put f***in' Downy

in these jerseys, Charlie.

Whoa! Hey, guys. Whoa, whoa.

- We're in trouble.

- What? Oh, sh*t, he's here.

- Who?

- Ogilthorpe.

- Ogie Ogilthorpe?

- You know Ogilthorpe?

- Ogil-terp?

- Ogilthorpe.

For the sake of the game,

they oughta throw him in San Quentin.

- He is a criminal element!

- The worst goon in hockey today.

- Oh, yeah. Real cement-head.

- Big Afro. 21, 22. Watch out for him.

He's not playing. He's suspended.

That's Ogie! 15 minutes. Let's go, now.

Big crowd out there tonight.

Let's really try to win this one, eh, boys?

Gotta hand it to the old bastard,

he's original.

That man travelled

15 hours by bus to say that?

Hey.

- What are you guys doin'?

- Puttin' on the foil.

- Every game.

- Yeah, you want some?

No.

Jesus f***in' Christ.

They don't leave the bench.

Charlie, ska...

Come on, now. The Chiefs are a terrific

organisation. But, well, the mill is closing,

and I think next year I'd be

interested in a good front-office job.

Al, that's why I made the trip.

I wanted to talk to you fellas face to face.

Excuse me just a minute, Al. Son.

Push thatpelvis way up there.

Way, way up there.

Raise your tummy up to...

Let's play it smart out there tonight.

I wanna see a lot of work from you guys.

Use your heads on the ice

out there, will ya?

We all know how to play hockey.

Just play it smart.

- Get out there and stick 'em!

- F*** 'em!

- Let's go!

- Come on!

- Come on!

- Let's go, now.

- We need this win. We've a lot of losses...

- Yeah!

That's what we're here for, guys. To win.

Play heads-up out there. Let's be smart.

We're better than any club if we try.

Come on, Braden. Our line starts.

It's f***ing embarrassing.

- Come on, guys. We can get it back!

- What for? We're history.

- What are you talkin' about?

- McGrath's tryin' to get himself a job.

- F***in' team's folding.

- I knew there was a reason he came.

- Nobody told me anything.

- He wasn't gonna tell you.

The f***er was holdin' on

till he could scrounge a job.

- Jesus Christ.

- Cover his wrinkled old ass.

F***in' Chrysler plant, here I come.

- The team, fini. Kaput.

- Fini?

This is the last season.

It'll be announced tomorrow.

I'm too old to be traded in.

A one-in-a-million chance.

I'm gonna be calling my brother

tomorrow at the f***in' Chrysler plant.

Operator? Operator?

Ah! Bernard. Yeah. They close it.

Yeah. Yeah, I want to echanger.

Bernard, call Detroit, tell them bullshit.

Yeah. Yeah, something.

Wait. Ned, what's echanger in English?

Trade me right f***ing now.

Trade me right f***ing now!

Now hang up.

Hello?

- Wait a minute. Reg!

- Yeah.

Yeah. Hey!

If I had to do it again, I would've gotten

an education. You know what I mean?

Jesus Christ, look at Ned here.

He doesn't have to depend on hockey.

What are you doin' here?

Oh. Where's Hanrahan?

I know a good bar here. The Palm lsle.

F***ed the barmaid last trip.

I mean, I walked into the place,

she comes up to me without even sayin'

hello and just rubs up against me.

Ah, come on, Mo. Jesus. What?

I mean, she had her jugs

right up against my suit.

- Nipples as hard as little rocks.

- Right, Morris.

Yeah. What's the address?

Any of you guys know

the Palm lsle in this town?

Yeah. Don't move.

Before Larry has his one chance

at ourJackpot Bowl,

is there anyone you would

like to say hello to back home?

- Ten bucks he says the guys at work.

- Ten bucks, wife and kids.

- I'm with Braden.

-..the camera and say hello to anybody.

I'd like to say hi

to all the guys down at work.

- All right!

- Ha!

Put my f***ing car

back on the track, will ya?

One more lap.

- Hi, Coach.

- Hi, Coach.

How are ya?

- Two-nothing. Two-nothing.

- Come on.

- Brought your cars, huh?

- We're on the road.

- We're all set to go.

- Tell us when.

Oh. I'm shufflin' lines around, guys. I'll let

you know when I get it straightened out.

- OK, Coach.

- See you later, Coach.

Five-nothing. Five-nothing.

- I'm beating you guys.

- The thing's not workin'. I quit.

I don't wanna play no more.

You broke the darn car.

- How am I supposed to play?

- You big baby.

You are the first man

I've slept with since I left Hanrahan.

Oh, Suzanne. A beautiful woman like you?

I've been sleeping with women.

Are you shocked?

No.

Did you ever wanna sleep with a man?

- No.

- Never?

No.

I don't blame you, though, Suzanne.

You see, women's bodies are beautiful.

But men's bodies, I see 'em everywhere.

Locker rooms, c*cks all over the place...

- Do you wanna know how it happened?

- No, that's OK.

No, that's all right.

Cos I have to tell it in court anyway.

See, every time

Hanrahan went out on the road,

I would go over to this wife's house,

and we would get drunk,

and we would talk about how depressed

and lonely we were without the guys.

Every week, blah, blah, blah.

Then, one night, we were talking

about how we hated the life,

and how we had never done

much of anything ourselves.

And I don't know why, really...

We were like kids.

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