Smiley Face Page #2

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Steve?

What about him?

He gives me

the creeps.

l think he might

be one of those

skull f***ers.

Know what

l 'm saying?

l bet that dude

fucks skulls,

with candles

and sh*t.

Oh my God !

You're right!

He's a f***ing freak.

So, listen.

lt would be a shame

if you didn't pay

me back today,

and in addition

to taking

your furniture,

l had to tell

your roommate

how you spent

the cash for

the power bill.

Hello?

Jane?

Hey!

ls this--?

Who is this?

lt's Kyle.

Oh, hey, baby,

what's up?

You asked me

to call you

to remind

you to go

to that audition?

Are you stoned?

Stoned?

blt's f***ing 10:45

in the morning./b

Know what, Jane?

This isn't really

working out.

l-l don't understand.

You're speaking

in riddles.

Kyle, you need to

listen very carefully

to what l 'm saying

and stop trying to

confuse the issue.

What? Wait, Kyle!

l can't hear you !

Kyle! Hold on !

l just have to--

Shut up!

Oh, sh*t.

Kyle? You still there?

Now what am

l gonna do?

l can't.

l daren't.

l really shouldn't.

The government weed.

l was saving the

government weed for

a special occasion,

but the government weed

will fetch a fair price

on the open market.

A very fair price.

Maybe just enough

to bail me out of

this jam.

bNumber three :

Go to my audition./b

Whoa.

That was intense.

Getting on?

l've never ridden

a bus in

L.A. before.

This is

gonna be fun.

Yeah, you're in

for a real treat.

Hey l You squashed

Bobby's car.

He spent

weeks putting

that together.

Hey, right on.

Look what

you've done.

l saw her.

She just

fell right over.

She didn't even

try to stay up.

Hey! One

thirty-five!

Okay.

Hold on.

Get up.

l'm trying.

There's something

wrong with her.

There's nothing

wrong with

me, lady.

What was it

doing on the

floor anyway?

lt wasn't

on the floor,

f***ing pothead.

You knocked

it out of

his hands.

l saw it.

l'm sorry.

That's not gonna

bring his

car back.

l think she's

on drugs.

He built

that for

his grandfather,

in the hospital.

Hey, lady!

One thirty five!

l'm getting it!

Hey!

Hey!

That was a close one.

''Come on, Frank.

''You know

l love surprises.

That's a fact.

l'm always willing

to make exceptions. ''

What a piece of sh*t.

''Come on, Frank.

''You know

l love surprises.

That's a fact.

l 'm always willing

to make exceptions?''

'' l 'm always willing

to make exceptions!''

'' l 'm always willing

to make exceptions!

'' l'm always willing

to make exceptions! !''

Four. Hit the

cash machine.

Wha--? l had over

a thousand dollars

in this account!

Oh, yeah.

Oh, no!

Take your furniture

or something like that.

No! Not my bed !

Not my Sleep

Number bed !

Hey

You forgot

to sign in.

''Come on, Frank.

You know l

love surprises. ''

Have a seat.

Hi.

Do you have

any gum?

Uhm,

l, uh,

wait.

Holy sh*t!

Where'd this

come from?

Do you

want some?

No, thank you !

No, no, no.

Seriously. l

could really use

the cash.

No, l don't.

No, l don't want any.

No. l don't want it.

l 'm really

stoned. Sorry.

Janel Janel

Yeah !

Yes, here!

Are you ready?

You betcha!

Hello.

Hi ! l 'm Jane.

lt's nice to

meet you.

l, um, heard

a lot about you.

Excuse me?

Nothing.

Whee!

Are you alright?

l'm fantastic!

How are you?

l'm fine.

Great!

Hang on a second.

What?

Huh?

Did you just

say something?

Who, me?

Yes.

l'm sorry.

l didn't realize

l had spoken.

Are you ready?

l sure am.

Are you ready?

l sure am.

Okay.

''Come on, Frank!

You know

l love surprises!''

l'm gonna stop

you right there.

l want you

to do it again,

but this time,

pull it

way back.

Okay. Sure.

Sure. You got it.

''Come on, Frank. You

know l love surprises. ''

What are

you doing?

l'm pulling it back.

Not that much.

Can't you find

some middle ground?

You better believe

l can find a

middle ground !

M iddle ground

is my middle name!

Thank you.

So how'd l do?

You did some

very interesting work.

Really?

Yes!

Well, thanks.

You have a

wonderful day.

Hey, let me

ask you something.

Do you want to

buy some pot?

Are you trying

to sell me drugs?

Well--

Young lady, have

a seat outside!

Gee, you don't

have to yell.

Sit!

Here?

l n the

waiting area! !

Bob l Get

in herel

Tried to sell

me marijuana.

Hey! Guys, l

was just kidding.

She tried to

sell you what?!

? Do you remember

Anyone here ?

? No, you don't remember

Anything at all ?

? Never woke up ?

? There's a party

l n my mind ?

? l'm hoping

Never stops ?

? There's a party

U p there ?

l'm taking

a sh*t!

Hold on !

l'm shitting !

l 'm just

taking a sh*t!

Still shitting !

Nothing to worry about.

l 'm just taking

a big old dump.

That's it.

All done.

l'm finished.

You got

nothing on me!

Nada! Zilcho!

Go ahead and frisk me!

Give it your best shot!

Hello there, Smiley.

Hi, Jane.

Meet me in

Venice at three.

You better

get going.

l 'm way ahead of

you, Smiley. Way

ahead of you.

Shelly!

This is Shelly.

bPlease leave

a message./b

Hey, Shelly l

Guess whol

So, listen. l'm

looking for a ride

out to Venice

for this Hemp

Festival thing.

And it sounds

cool, right?

Anyway, l thought

you might dig it.

But l guess

you're not there.

Um,

Jesus, Shelly, l'm

so f***ing stoned

you wouldn't believe it!

Call me.

Hi, please leave

a message

bfor me or Tony

after the beep./b

Uh,

who is

this again?

Hello?

M rs. Green?

Yes.

lt's Jane!

Who?

Jane! l studied

clarinet with you !

lt doesn't

really ring a--

H mm, l, l don't--

Brevin Ericson.

Oh, boy.

Shall we say a few words

about Brevin Ericson?

Shall we say

a few words

about love?

For Brevin Ericson

is completely,

100 % head

over heels

in love.

Perhaps it's difficult

for you to comprehend

how anybody could be

so passionately

inclined toward

someone like this.

But do not judge

her too harshly.

After all, how was

she to know they

were pot cupcakes?

And ask yourselves,

who amongst you

might not have

done the same?

Who are we to judge

heartbeats in a

young man's heart?

Do you want Lightning

Strikes Thrice?

Yeah.

Do you want

Secret Secret Agents?

l already have--

Exactly.

Dude, your roommate

is kind of hot.

You're kidding,

right?

bYou're so good./b

bNol/b

Oh, Brevin l

You're beating me.

Damn it l

Oh, Brevin,

right in there.

bOh l/b

Oh, yeah.

But--

l thought you

had a boyfriend.

We're kinda

taking a break

right now.

Mm-hmm.

What's that got

to do with anything?

l 'm talking about

something bigger

than our petty yearnings.

Of course.

So are we doing

this or what?

Well--

Come on, man.

lt's going to be

f***ing transformative.

lt sounds great.

l just--

What?

l , uh--

So, you are sure

you want to come to

the dentist with me?

Absolutely, man.

Absolutely.

Let me just drop

you off at a coffee

shop or something.

No, not necessary,

my good man.

l 'm really looking

forward to it.

So last week

they worked on

my left side.

Today they're gonna

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