Snowmen Page #5

- Hold on.

Let me just finish this one.

You know what else snowmen

like to eat?

Ohilly.

Iceberg-ers and chilly.

Okay, good.

Keep moving.

I looked up a bunch

of snowman jokes.

For morale, right?

Hey, guys, you know

where snowmen keep their money?

No, Lucas. Stop it.

They keep their money

in a snow bank.

- Oome on, Lucas!

- Get it? Snow bank!

No more jokes!

About three inches short.

Profound.

Hey, Howard, how are we doing?

Um, pretty good.

Done with my section.

Hey, Howard,

how do snowmen travel?

Lucas, stop it.

No more jokes.

They travel bicycle.

Get it? By-icicle?

That's the best one, right?

I hope it's the last one, mon.

Oome on, guys. Let's go get lunch

and go over the numbers, okay?

Okay, mon.

Oh, guys!

How does a snowman lose weight?

He sits by a fire.

Well, obviously, you can see there's

more than enough room for them,

and the owner before you,

what he did

is he put in a satellite television,

and you get the local stations like...

Tell me about

what's happening here today.

My gosh, that's my son.

We're setting a world record

for the most snowmen in a day,

and I think we're gonna do it.

I haven't counted yet, but, yeah.

I think we're doing good.

About 800 done for sure,

maybe 400 still need faces.

We should hurry up

and get back out there, right?

- Yeah, we should.

- He's right, mon.

They're not even halfway

and lunch is almost over.

Profound.

We're doing great on the numbers.

We can do this.

Billy, we have a problem.

- What's the matter?

We have almost 2,000 snowmen already.

That's fantastic!

But it's all melting.

Snowmen are falling over

or shrinking.

We're spending all our time

just fixing everything.

We're running

out of good snow, too.

All that's left is muddy,

gross stuff.

Billy, we have to fix this.

We only have three hours

till the mayor gets here.

- Yeah, I know.

- Uh-oh.

I think the mayor's here now!

Mr. Mayor.

Mayor Noray, welcome.

I'm the principal.

Yes, we are just so thrilled

and honored

that you could come here.

How could I say no?

Oh.

Well, here comes

the mastermind now.

Hi, Bill.

So, uh, how we doing?

Well, you're kinda early,

so we need just a little more time.

Uh-oh. Well, that's fine.

That's fine.

Maybe like an hour,

at least an hour.

An hour?

Why that's... That's perfect.

Let's set as big a record

as we can now.

I'm even gonna come

help you in a minute,

right after we take this tour.

- Thank you so much.

- Thank you!

Okay.

Wait a minute!

What are you doing?

Everyone,

why are you leaving the field?

Don't give up!

Everybody! Listen!

We have one hour!

We can do this!

But the snow's too melty.

Oome on. Don't give up.

We're so close.

Hey!

What happened to all their heads?

Don't cry, Little Willie.

Maybe you'll make it

in the record book

for the world's

biggest waste of time.

Let's report him.

Where'd the teachers go?

They went inside

with all the cameras and the mayor.

Just ignore them, Billy!

We need more snow, don't we?

Don't you think that's enough?

Kill Hill? No way.

Won't melt fast.

We could chop it up into blocks

and make snowmen that way,

like an igloo.

I don't think they're gonna let us.

Not without a fight.

Bill, those look icy.

You can't throw ice.

Don't, Billy!

It's not worth it.

They're gonna kill us.

It doesn't matter to me.

Don't, Billy!

Please! Let's go!

Oh!

Let's go!

Let's get out of here!

Oome on, Billy!

Whoa!

Waste him.

- Yeah!

- Get him!

Get him!

He's over there!

- Hurry!

- We're gonna get you!

Oome on! Let's go!

You're gonna get it now!

- We're gonna get you!

- Uh-oh!

Get him!

Whoa!

Yeah! Oh, crap!

I'm gonna get you, Lucas!

Aah!

Hurry up!

Oh!

Get him!

Hey, they're over here!

Hey!

Ow!

There's no one on Kill Hill!

Let's go!

Oh, my gosh! They're taking the hill!

Oome on!

Oome on, you guys!

Yes!

I'm king of Kill Hill! Yeah!

What's wrong with you?

If you can't handle it, then stay

off the hill, you little whiner.

- You okay, kid?

- What are you doing?

Who cares about the little turd?

He deserved it.

Yeah, well,

that was too rough, Jas.

Screw you, you pansy!

Hey, you made it to the top.

Way to go, man.

Where are you going?

I just saved the hill.

Oome on.

We can cream these runts!

Who cares?

It's just a pile of snow.

Fine.

Then go home to your mommies,

you bunch of losers!

You're the loser!

Oh, come on!

Rrr! Get off!

Get him, Lucas.

Now's your chance.

Get him! Get him!

Get him! Oome on!

Oome on, Lucas.

Hit him back.

Hit him! Hit him! Hit him!

Just hit him!

Don't be a wimp!

I'm not a wimp!

Go, Lucas!

I'm coming, Lucas.

It's weird.

I actually feel sorry for him.

Me, too. It must be hard

not having any friends.

Are we still doing the record?

Oh, yeah, yeah, definitely!

Go get the shovels, and we'll

start chopping up the hill, okay?

What about right here?

This is a good one,

right in front of the school sign.

Oh, yes.

That would be wonderful.

Oh, got to check for yellow snow.

Wouldn't want that.

- He's set to go.

- Yellow snow.

You know what would be really cute,

really cute?

If we used the mayor's scarf

for the snowman, don't you think?

- It could be...

- Hey, hey, hey!

- Looks like I made itjust in time.

- Oh. Mr. Kirk...

Oh, Principal Wetzel,

how are you?

Hi. It's good to see you.

What a surprise.

It's Orazy Kirk here!

Ha ha! Orazy Kirk's Motors!

- How are you?

- Nice to see you, Reggie.

I can't say I'm surprised.

I saw what was happening

on the news,

and I just wanted to see if my son

helped set the new world record.

Let me say this right now,

how honored I am to be

a part of your son's legacy.

He's an extraordinary boy,

and, uh, people will remember him

for many, many years.

You make it sound like he's dying.

What?

You make it sound like he isn't.

We can do this.

- Yeah!

- Yeah!

This is it! This is all

the snow we need to set a record!

But it ain't enough people, mon.

We'll just get on the news

and ask everyone in town to come help.

We do have until midnight, right?

Oh, man, we're so close.

We can do this.

That's enough!

Everybody,

back to your homeroom, please.

It's a greatjob, but there's not gonna be

a world record set here today.

- I'm sorry.

- What?

Why? No, we can still do it.

We just need to ask for help.

Billy! Billy, stop.

It's over, okay?

- Why?

Why can't we keep trying?

Because you lied

to everyone, Billy.

You tricked them into helping you.

What lie?

Oome on.

We'll talk about it at home.

- Oome on.

- No!

Are you talking about me dying?

It's true! I have cancer!

My dad just doesn't want me to know

so I can enjoy my last days!

Oh, my...

I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry, uh...

I don't know what's wrong with him.

Oome on.

Then why have I been

so sick lately?

You have a cold, Billy.

I know you know that

because I was with you

when the doctor told you.

Yeah. Just like you told me

it was a cold last year when it wasn't.

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