Something New Page #7

I should have called first.

The reason you haven't

heard from me is 'cause...

well, to be honest,

I felt stupid.

I should have just

listened to you that day.

All you needed was a shoulder,

not another critic.

I don't know where

my head was that day.

I had a guy walk off the job, and I

guess I was feeling a little frustrated.

I wanna be there for you,

Kenya. I really do.

And we can talk. We can

talk about whatever you like.

I may not always relate, but

I can promise I'll empathize.

Can you trust that?

'Cause it'd be a terrible shame to let

something so superficial get in our way.

Just give up because

it's challenging sometimes.

I mean, aren't we both

up to the challenge?

Kenya, I love you.

I don't know

what to say.

Should I give you a hint?

Look, I met someone else.

It's not like I went out looking

or anything. It just happened.

Let me guess.

He's black?

It is not only that.

We have more in common.

A suit-and-tie guy?

Yeah.

Let's go, Max.

Come on, let's go.

I didn't mean for this

to happen.

Don't worry. We were just...

We were just hanging out, right?

Right.

Look, I'll put the check for

the landscaping in the mail.

No, don't. Don't.

Take care.

You got to keep everything loose.

Got to keep your knees loose.

Keep your hips loose.

Keep everything loose.

Like that, all right?

What does this have to

do with hitting the ball?

This is how you gotta get the

motion. You gotta get the feel.

Know what I'm saying? Bounce

with me. Bounce with it.

Look at that. Look at that.

There you go, girl.

Keep your knees loose.

Three things.

There's the back swing.

There's the contact.

And then

there's the follow-through.

Now follow through,

let me see how you do that.

Like that.

Good. All right, you got it.

Okay.

This is great, right?

Thank you. You're doing

a great job, young man.

We're supposed to do this.

Hey, little man.

Thank you.

No, it's for you.

Oh, for me?

Yeah.

This is Leah's family synagogue,

right? Yeah, I guess so.

You need to

get a yarmulke.

Kenya.

Hello.

This is Penelope, Kenya.

You're Penelope.

It's nice to meet you.

I love your dress.

Thanks.

Oh, I'm sorry. This is...

This is Mark.

Brian.

How are you doing?

Hi.

So, you two got back

together. That's nice.

Yeah.

Well, it's good

to see you.

Okay, maybe I should

call a doctor.

No, no. It's nothing.

My asthma just comes back at the

oddest times. That's all. It'll pass.

Okay, what is this about?

Is this about Brian?

Brian? No, no, no.

But can you believe, he had the nerve

to show up with that white woman?

Last time I checked,

Brian was white, too.

And it is over, right? You

broke up with him, right?

Okay, you know what, guys? Maybe

we shouldn't talk about this here...

'cause this is

a rabbi's study.

I don't think it's too cool

for us to be in here.

Look, girl, pull it together.

Don't let Mark see you like this.

How could he?

It was so easy for him to just get

back with her like it was nothing.

Aren't you forgetting

something? You've got a man, too.

A fine, successful,

black man. Okay?

You're right. What am I

saying? Mark's wonderful.

Mark is fine.

Yes.

He's your IBM, right?

Right. Right.

I mean, let's get real here, okay.

Brian is cute and all that,

but he is a white boy.

Oh, come on, Kenya, please!

I mean, were you really gonna

go the distance?

Honestly?

Be honest with yourself.

You always get in your own

way. This is what you do.

You've got a lot of nerve talking

about going the distance...

screwing married men!

Okay, okay. Enough.

What happened to "Let

go, let flow?" Good luck.

Wait, wait, wait.

I'm sorry.

It's fine.

It is true though, girl.

Go deal with them demons.

Look, it's not about

going the distance. Okay?

'Cause you guys said that Walter

and I weren't gonna make it.

And we tighter than ever.

Kenya, I don't know what your

problem is, girl, but Mark is a catch.

And if you don't know what to do

with him, girl, pass him on to me...

'cause I will show you

what to do with him.

I'll marry his ass quick and

give him a shitload of babies.

Black, ashy babies.

Our Sunday dinners have been a tradition

since our first year of marriage.

Right, Edmond?

Right, Joyce.

It's the only day I'm

guaranteed a home-cooked meal.

So, Mark, I understand your

father owns an insurance brokerage.

That's bedrock.

So your parents, how long

have they been married?

Baby, you wanna ask him for

his social security number, too?

It's just a question.

Forty-five years.

They're my role models.

Oh, how sweet!

Next year

we will celebrate our 35th.

Dr. McQueen is

the adventurer...

and I am, how should I say...

the voice of reason.

It's a good balance.

He's always encouraging me

to try new things...

and of course, I'm always

saying, "No, thank you."

I had to show them who's

boss. You know what I mean?

Hell yes, I do.

So did Lauren happen to Lana? And

who's lined up to happen to Lauren?

The last girl I was with, her name was

Luna. Yeah, and Lauren did happen to her.

And Lauren might actually be the

one. Check out her stats. She's fine.

She is an optician,

and she owns her own place.

The odds are definitely

in her favor.

Stats?

Stats.

Is that how you decide to have

a relationship with someone?

I'm just trying to keep up

with you, big sis.

Mark is a great move.

You did good. You did.

Mrs. McQueen,

you'll like this story.

I convinced your daughter

to go out with me...

by suggesting she

accompany me house-hunting.

I told her I needed the

accountant's perspective, now.

What I did not tell her

was as a tax lawyer myself...

I already knew the numbers.

Yeah. Yeah, that's me.

They call me the numbers man.

But can you blame me?

You gotta use what you got.

Mark, that is so cute.

Thank you.

And if things

keep going well...

in six months from now, who

knows what we'll be celebrating.

Right, Kenya?

Oh, my God.

Oh, Mark.

Oh, my! Oh, my God!

Let's just forget the coffee

and pop some champagne.

Oh, my God!

You know...

I love that picture of you, at

your folks, with the long hair.

You know which one?

You should let it grow.

I can't.

I can't do this.

Kenya, Kenya, Kenya.

Am I going too fast?

Kenya, wait, wait, wait.

Kenya. Hey, come on. I'll put

you in the guest room, all right?

If you're not ready, it's all right.

It's all right. I understand. No pressure.

In fact, I will... I will wait

for you as long as you want.

Okay, I'll drive you home.

No, I'll drive myself.

Why?

I can't do this.

You're a great guy.

Perfect.

But this just isn't

right for me.

I hope you understand.

Wait, was it something I said?

Something I did?

No, not at all. You've

been wonderful. It's me.

I'm just looking

for something.

I don't know what it is,

really, but it's not here.

Just like that.

I'm sorry.

Sh*t. Sh*t.

Sh*t.

I'm so stupid.

Maybe I just made the

biggest mistake of my life.

He was fine and smart.

But there was no fizzle.

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