Sonic the hedgehog 2 Page #9

[Scene change:
Inside the bar, night]

[Tatiana arrives, and places two bowls down at Sonic and Tails' table]

Tails:
Ugh! Uh, I'm sorry, but I asked for the beef stew.

Miles Electric:
[translating to Russian] Your breath smells like goat poop.

[Tatiana looks insulted]

Tatiana:
[In Russian] What did you say?

[People at the bar begin to form a crowd around Sonic and Tails]

Sonic:
Uh, what's going on?

Tails:
Maybe they think it's my birthday?

Sonic:
Don't worry, I'll take care of this. [Sonic stands up on the table] Okay, everybody, take it easy. I'm sure there's a perfectly good explanation for whatever my friend said or did.

Miles Electric:
[translating to Serbian] Stand back. I just farted.

[The crowd briefly looks disgusted, then removes Sonic and Tails' disguises. The crowd gasps at their true appearances]

Sonic:
[Nervously] Uh... meow?

Russian Giant Bully: [In Russian] Throw these monsters in the fire! [The crowd cheers, and picks up Sonic and Tails, dragging them towards the roaring fire]

Sonic:
Oh, no, no. Come on, guys. Take it easy. Let's talk this through. Let's talk this through!

[The crowd begins preparing to throw Sonic and Tails into the fire]

Tails:
[Accessing data from his Miles Electric] Oh, come on, come on! Scanning Siberian customs. There's got to be something in here.

Sonic:
Tails, whatever you're doing, do it fast.

Tails:
Ooh! I think I got it! Pivonka! Pivonka! PIVONKA!!!

Bartender:
Pivonka?

[The crowd parts, giving way to a burly man wearing an ornate red robe with the word "Champion" on its back in Russian]

Russian Dancer:
Da. Pivonka! [The crowd roars]

Sonic:
Tails, what's a "pivonka"?

Tails:
[Reading off of his Miles Electric] It's a Siberian custom to resolve disputes. If we win, they let us go. If we lose… [The fire flares up]

[The crowd moves away furniture from the center of the bar to create an open area]

Sonic:
Okay, we have to grab the map and get out of here. Where's the map?

Tails:
Oh, no. I left it on the table! Look!

[The bartender grabs the map and puts it on a plate with other assorted objects. The champion takes off his robe, revealing a tattoo of what seems to be himself with arms spread out. Sonic looks confused]

Sonic:
What?

[The champion calls in other people as the band starts playing, then starts dancing with the others to a Siberian tune. The crowd claps as they finish their first round of dancing with a flourish]

Sonic:
Oh, my God, it's a dance fight.

Tails:
Uhh... Sonic, what do we do?

Sonic:
We dance... and get that map.

[The Siberians watch as Sonic and Tails try to dance, but do so very poorly]

Sonic:
Here we go.

[Sonic tries to mimic the Siberian champion's moves, only to step on Tails' hand]

Tails:
Ow!

[The Siberians do not look impressed, as they try to dance again]

Sonic:
Okay, now let's do. No, we're gonna go…

[Sonic and Tails collide with each other and fall over. The Serbians once again begin dancing, as Sonic and Tails try to mimic the moves again]

Sonic:
Ah! Ah, Okay!

Tails:
OOF!

[Another bartender notices the map stuck to the bottom of a cup. He tosses it away without a second thought]

Sonic:
Okay, this is not going well. Channing Tatum makes it look so easy.

Tails:
Wait, Sonic. Look!

[The map is shown stuck to the bottom of the champion's boot]

Bar crowd:
Pivonka! Pivonka! Pivonka! Pivonka!

Sonic:
The map! Come on, let's grab it!

[Sonic reaches for the map, only for the champion to pick it up and hold it over his head]

Russian Dancer:
You want? Come get.

[He places the map into his waistband, for security]

Russian Dancer:
Freaks!

Bar crowd:
Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! Freaks!

[Tails begins panicking seeing everyone mocking them, and even seeing the old woman laughing and holding up her skull crochet to her face. Sonic manages to snap him out of it with a shoulder touch]

Sonic:
What's wrong, Tails? Come on. I need you!

Tails:
I can't do this, Sonic. I'm not brave like you. My gadget got us in this mess, and I lost your map, and we're gonna get tossed into a fire!

[Sonic notices the device playing the music. He smiles. Sonic has an ingenious plan]

Sonic:
Ah! New DJ coming in!

[He dashes up to it, and plugs in his phone, causing it to play "Uptown Funk". The Serbians look confused]

Sonic:
Come on, pal. I got an idea. [Sonic starts dancing] They called us freaks, so let's get freaky. Just follow my moves. You'll be fine.

[Sonic extends his hand to Tails. He grabs it. Both of them begin dancing in synchronization. The crowd applauds at this display of breakdancing as well as funk dancing. Tails uses his Miles Electric to create several dancing holograms of himself]

Sonic:
All right! Backup dancers!

[The champion looks nervous at seeing this, as the holograms all march towards him. Some of the holograms cover Sonic with their tails)

Sonic:
Here we go!

[Sonic jumps up in the air and strikes a pose reminiscent of the cover art to Sonic Adventure. Tails takes flight and lifts Sonic. Holograms of Sonic are created, which are lifted by the hologram Tails in suit]

Sonic:
There's a lot of me up here!

[The champion desperately tries to outdo Sonic by dancing. Tails tosses Sonic onto a chandelier, which he swings around on]

Sonic:
I love pivonka!

[The Champion looks very tired out, unable to keep up with the two "freaks"]

Sonic:
And big dismount!

[Sonic and Tails land. All the holograms disappear in glimmering "fireworks." And the champion finally falls over. The crowd cheers]

Sonic:
Yeah! I'll take that.

[Sonic takes the map from the fallen champion. The crowd lifts Sonic and Tails up as the victors of the pivonka]

Tails:
Woo-hoo! We did it!

Sonic:
That was amazing! Way to go, Tails!

[Cuts to next scene. Sonic and Tails are lying on the bar table. Many of the remaining bar guests are asleep]

Tails:
Ha! Wow. Only Sonic the Hedgehog could win a dance battle that epic.

Sonic:
Well, stick with me, pal. Earth can be a scary place, but I know everything about this old pale blue dot.

Tails:
Do you really mean that?

Sonic:
I mean, not everything. But I watch a lot of Discovery Channel and…

Tails:
I meant about me being your pal.

Sonic:
Of course, buddy. [Tails hugs Sonic] Whoa-ho-ho! Coming in hot.

Tails:
Growing up, I didn't have any friends. Everyone in my village thought my two tails were weird.

Sonic:
Hey, I know that feeling.

Tails:
But then I saw you, the fastest creature in the galaxy. You were weird too. But you were a legend. That made me think, maybe being weird isn't so bad. You inspired me to leave my village, to find you and help you in your mission.

Sonic:
I'm really glad you're here, Tails.

Tails:
I'm glad I'm here too, Sonic. [Both jump off the desk and head towards the fireplace]

Sonic:
[yawns] Well, might as well get some sleep. This feels like a good place to spend the night. [Sonic grabs a blanket from a chair.] You'll be able to get clear readings on your gizmo thing once the storm is over, so I… [Sonic notices that Tails is already asleep on the rug. He gives him the blanket, before lying down beside him] Night, Tails. [Tails moves his tails to cover Sonic]

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