South Park
- TV-MA
- Year:
- 1997
- 22 min
- 2,792 Views
EXT. SCHOOL BUS STOP - MORNING
STAN, KYLE AND KENNY wait in the snow for their school bus,
holding their lunch boxes and debating.
KIDS:
(Singing)
School days school days, teacher's
golden-
Kyle's little brother, IKE, bounces into frame.
KYLE:
-Ah damn it, my little brother's
trying to follow me to school again.
IKE tries to talk.
IKE:
BaBa Simi
KYLE:
Ike, you can't come to school with
me!
IKE:
BaBa Simi ba baa.
CARTMAN:
Yeah, go home you little dildo.
KYLE:
Dude! Don't call my brother a dildo.
STAN:
What's a dildo?
KYLE:
I don't know... and I'll bet Cartman
doesn't know either!
CARTMAN:
I know what it means!
KYLE:
Well, what?!
CARTMAN:
...I'm not telling you.
STAN:
What's a dildo, Kenny?
Kenny talks, but we can't understand him through his thick
coat.
KENNY:
Mph rmph phrmph m phrmph mmr.
The boys all laugh.
CARTMAN:
HA YEAH! THAT'S WHAT KYLE'S LITTLE
BROTHER IS ALRIGHT!!
Suddenly, Kyle grabs Ike by the feet, swings him around, and
bashes Cartman in the face.
CARTMAN:
OW!
STAN:
Dude that kicks ass!
KYLE:
Yeah! Check this one out!
(to Ike)
Ready Ike? Kick the baby
IKE:
Don't kick the baby.
KYLE:
Kick the baby.
Kyle kicks his brother down the icy road.
IKE:
Wahhhhh!
Ike shoots down the road with a playful scream, and crashes
head first into a group of mail boxes.
Cartman yawns grotesquely.
STAN:
Whoa, Cartman, looks like you didn't
get much sleep last night.
CARTMAN:
That's 'cause I was having these
bogus nightmares.
KYLE:
Really, what about?
CARTMAN:
Well, I dreamt that I was lying in
my bed... In the dark...
INT. CARTMAN'S BEDROOM - DREAM SEQUENCE
Cartman is lying in his bed.
CARTMAN(V.O.)
...When all of a sudden this bright
blue light filled the room.
A bright light fills the room.
CARTMAN:
And slowly my bedroom door began to
open... And then the next thing I
remember, I was being drug through a
hallway!
INT. ALIEN SHIP - DREAM SEQUENCE
Cartman is being dragged by his ankles down a dark, organic
corridor like the one seen in 'Fire In The Sky'.
CARTMAN:
Then I was lying on a table, and
these scary aliens wanted to operate
on me! And they had big heads...
And big black eyes-
EXT. BUSSTOP - (REALITY)
The boys are listening to Cartman's story with wide eyes and
open mouths. Even little Ike is enthralled.
STAN:
Dude! Visitors!
KYLE:
Totally!
CARTMAN:
What?
STAN:
That wasn't a dream, Cartman, those
were visitors!
CARTMAN:
(Nervous)
No, it was just a dream. My mom said
so!
STAN:
Visitors are real!
KYLE:
Yeah, they abduct people and they
mutilate cows!
CARTMAN:
Ah shut up, you guys, you're just
trying to make me scared, and it's
not working.
A large Chevy screeches to a halt. CHEF gets out of the car
and approaches the kids.
CHEF:
Hello there, children.
KIDS:
Hey, Chef.
STAN:
What's gonna be for lunch today,
Chef?
CHEF:
Well, today it's Salisbury steak
with buttered noodles and a choice
of green bean casserole or vegetable
medley.
CARTMAN:
Kick ass!
CHEF:
Say, did any of you children see the
alien spaceship last night?
CARTMAN:
HUH?!
STAN:
Yeah, fat boy saw it!
CARTMAN:
No! Th-That was just a dream! And
I'm NOT fat, I'm big-boned.
Translation
Translate and read this script in other languages:
Select another language:
- - Select -
- 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
- 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
- Español (Spanish)
- Esperanto (Esperanto)
- 日本語 (Japanese)
- Português (Portuguese)
- Deutsch (German)
- العربية (Arabic)
- Français (French)
- Русский (Russian)
- ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
- 한국어 (Korean)
- עברית (Hebrew)
- Gaeilge (Irish)
- Українська (Ukrainian)
- اردو (Urdu)
- Magyar (Hungarian)
- मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
- Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Italiano (Italian)
- தமிழ் (Tamil)
- Türkçe (Turkish)
- తెలుగు (Telugu)
- ภาษาไทย (Thai)
- Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
- Čeština (Czech)
- Polski (Polish)
- Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Românește (Romanian)
- Nederlands (Dutch)
- Ελληνικά (Greek)
- Latinum (Latin)
- Svenska (Swedish)
- Dansk (Danish)
- Suomi (Finnish)
- فارسی (Persian)
- ייִדיש (Yiddish)
- հայերեն (Armenian)
- Norsk (Norwegian)
- English (English)
Citation
Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:
Style:MLAChicagoAPA
"South Park" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 26 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/south_park_156>.
Discuss this script with the community:
Report Comment
We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.
If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly.
Attachment
You need to be logged in to favorite.
Log In