South Sea Woman Page #8

Beat it, chop-chop, beat it.

Ocean cruise? You're still

talking about that trip to the moon?

You'll find out where this trip is to.

Take him in, chief.

Shove off, matey,

or you'll find a hunk of lead in your belly.

Shove off.

Stick around, Ginger.

I'll be seeing you and soon.

You are the most horrible, despicable...

Remember, baby,

I told you the bugle would blow.

But you didn't say you'd blow it.

Sorry, baby.

Madam, you are great.

Thanks for everything.

You are the greatest.

It's time for adieu.

For long time, no come see.

Be careful.

They will put holes in you like a cheese.

No.

Sergeant o'Hearn!

Sergeant o'Hearn!

Sarge, sarge.

- You all right, sarge?

- Fine.

- How about that yacht? Snag it?

- Easy as hanging out Maggie's drawers.

- They're loading on the ammunition.

- Good.

- Marchand?

- He poses in a Portuguese dungeon.

That's fine. Has anybody got a pencil?

Here.

- What about Davey White?

- Lost to the mast, sir.

That's great. We're gonna requisition a ship

in the name of the government.

And according to the manual,

we gotta leave a receipt.

"LoU one yacht."

Let's go, boys. Come on.

That's how the USS Montezuma was put

to sea with a full complement and crew.

We christened her the Montezuma...

... because she was the flagship

of the Navy of the U.S. Marines.

We didn't have no champagne

to bust over her bow...

... so we used a bottle of Van Dorck's

stinking hair tonic.

And my pal Davey.

He didn't have the slightest notion

where we were heading or why.

All he knew was he'd like to cut

my gizzard out and throw it to the sharks.

Yes, we had enough armament aboard

to make a little noise in an argument.

That crazy Aussie

was beginning to find...

... salt brine tasted

a little better than alcohol.

And that Jimmylegs...

... he was beginning to find out

navigating was a lot better than vegetating.

I guess everything in the engine room

was going well...

... for we was keeping up a fair head

of steam. Oh, yes, I forgot.

The little bank clerk from Seattle

was sure anxious to break out the colors.

But like it says in the manual:

"When you don't know what's around

the corner, don't blow your horn."

Yes, sir. That's how

the USS Montezuma put to sea...

... with a complement of 10 men aboard.

How's it look, Fitzroy?

All clear, sir.

How about it? Where are we?

Well, I haven't charted a course

for 20 years and I've forgotten me glasses.

Quit stalling. Where are we?

I dead reckon

we should be in the Pooking Straits.

Get that machine gun on the cabin

in case we have to fire in any direction.

I'll get you a tarp. Give him a hand.

Where did that Kraut hide those tarps?

- Well, for crying out loud.

- Ginger.

Get out. How did you get here?

How did you get onboard?

Madam Duval took me in a rowboat.

I climbed up while you were

loading the guns.

- That sure was bright.

- I couldn't help it. I just had to come.

Don't you know the islands around here

are crawling with Japs?

Don't fall for that malarkey, baby.

Our hero's bucking for another medal.

Let me tell you

two knuckleheads something.

While you were smooching,

I found out a few things:

Number one, there's an island ahead

called Guadalcanal. A Jap island.

Number two, the Marines have landed

and they're fighting on the beach.

Number three,

that's where we're heading.

- Oh, no.

- How do you know?

I spent two hours looking for Marchand's

radio before I found it in his latrine.

- No fooling?

- No fooling, lover boy.

Now you'll fight like a real leatherneck

fights or face a firing squad.

First we gotta get the Pink Lotus

up to Namou.

- I won't go back.

- You won't, huh?

You want your body shot full of holes?

I'll take my chances.

I can help out doing something.

As a nurse maybe.

- You're going back.

- He's right, baby.

I tell you I won't go back.

I don't care what happens to me.

I couldn't stay on that island alone

because...

Well, nothing means anything to me

unless I'm with the both of you.

The both of us?

What do you mean, the both of us?

- I don't know. It just slipped out.

- How can a thing like that slip out?

- I don't know.

- You told me you hate him.

I do, I do.

I hate him more than anybody else.

- Look what you did. You made her cry.

- I made her cry?

Why, you dumb ox.

- Who's a dumb ox?

- Stop it. I can't stand to see you two fight.

- Don't worry, I'll murder him.

- You don't understand.

It's me she means. She's just

in the process of swinging over.

Why, you...

Smile when you throw a punch, sucker.

It throws the other fellow off-guard.

Japs ahead. Nips, nips!

Sweet Fanny Adams, look at them.

- Holy cow. Look at them Jap barges.

- A whole landing force.

All set to move in on Guadalcanal.

Tonight maybe.

We can put a crimp into that idea.

Well, what are we waiting for?

I thought all you wanted to do

was to lay back and sniff the tropic breezes.

Okay, hero, but remember this:

I'm fighting my way out of this war,

not into it.

If we get out of this mess you got us into,

I'm heading right back for Namou.

Fitzroy, what kind of gunneries they got?

Small arms, machine guns

and a couple of trench mortars.

- Great, we got them outgunned.

- Sarge.

You're living in a dream world.

Take a squint at that.

What do you know?

Mama watching over her chicks.

We should have stayed in bed.

Ain't that a Jap destroyer?

She can sink us in one blast.

- But I'm wondering, why don't she do it?

- We're flying the Dutch flag.

They must think we're van Dorck.

- That's it, chief, you got it.

- Why don't we run for it?

Give ourselves away?

You, put on a life jacket and get below.

- Well, maybe I...

- You heard what I said, get.

Fitzroy, come on down. On the double.

Everybody undercover.

They got binoculars too.

Now, listen, you guys, we ain't

gonna get captured by no Japs, see?

Our only chance is to move in

and let them have it.

You don't think a tub like this

can sink a destroyer?

Her steering mechanism, you jerk.

Her gunnery control.

We gotta knock them out

before they get to us.

Everybody to their stations,

loosen them tarpaulins.

On the double.

Full speed ahead.

Marines ain't brave.

They're just plain nuts.

- Breaking out the recognition pendant.

- We'll have to answer them.

Uncover that.

We'll drop them our calling card.

Ready on the borders?

Paul, uncover the machine gun.

You guys wanna see daylight tomorrow,

don't miss that bridge.

Everybody ready?

Fire.

Come on, Fitzroy, load her up.

Keep firing.

Give it to them, Davey.

Right in the keister.

The guys didn't miss.

We knocked out their steering mechanism

and their intercom.

And we butchered their gunnery control.

It was like Jack Dempsey throwing punches,

only he's swinging wild.

Man, that gave you your chance.

Jettison your cargo and run.

- Yes, lay down a smoke screen.

- With what?

We were on the yacht, not the destroyer.

Besides, it wouldn't be long before

they'd be operating on manual control.

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