Splitting Adam Page #6

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Thanks to you, you showed me

that the real Adam

might not be so bad after all.

If you just give me

one more chance,

I promise I'll never pretend to

be someone I'm not ever again.

I just... I... I really wanted

to im... to impress you.

Adam!

Uh!

I gotcha, I gotcha.

Hurry, let's get him

to the couch.

Are you okay?

Yeah, I think so.

I don't know what's going on.

It's the machine, Adam.

That's what

I've been trying to tell you.

Here.

It's been 67 hours since

the last duplicate was created.

Each copy has manifested

different traits.

Exhibit one.

Exhibit two.

Each clone exhibits

a shared sense of feeling.

Even shared pain.

No way!

Ah!

Scientific research, don't

you think, boys and girls?

That's not the part.

Here.

Mysterious side effects

have surfaced.

The headaches,

the sweating and dizziness.

And now a rash.

Oh, nasty.

If my analysis is correct,

complete bodily disintegration

will occur just eight hours

after the initial onset

of these symptoms.

Further, each of my copies

will suffer the same fate

shortly after my own expiration.

The only way to stop the cycle

is with the duplex ignitor.

Inserting the duplex ignitor in

reverse position creates

a protonic window through which

each clone can be sent

back into the initial subject.

To do this, each clone must

travel into the machine

at a high speed, at no less

than 37 miles per hour.

That's good.

We should do that.

This is our only hope.

Professor Loin signing off

possibly for the last time.

Van's packed,

let's get this show...

Uncle Mitch.

road.

I can explain.

Nephew, what have you done?

Busted.

This is brilliant.

What?

We can use them in the show.

Yeah,

we can rage the magic show!

We're gonna magic history.

What?

No, no, no, no, Uncle Mitch,

it's too dangerous.

We have to get them back

in the tanning bed thing.

Or the cloning machine

thing... I don't know.

Tanning bed?

Uh, that might be a problem.

What?

What happened?

It was like this when I came in.

I thought Gillian had practiced

her karate on it or something.

We'll fix it.

We'll make a plan.

He can't get away with this.

You're not alone, Adam.

There's just one problem.

The duplex ignitor is gone.

St importantly,

we get the duplex ignitor back.

And Uncle Mitch, you can still

save the park with a great show.

Oh.

Yes!

All right, guys,

we're all gonna be needed

for the trick here.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Wait.

I can't do the show without her.

She's my good luck charm.

Now why the slide?

Because the professor said

that all the clones

are gonna need to be traveling

at least 37 miles an hour

to breech the energy field's

outer shell.

Yeah.

That'... that's it, yeah.

And before we take

the plunge, we're gonna need

the duplex ignitor,

which of course Perfect has.

How do we know

he'll even show up?

I know.

I can text him

to meet me at the show.

It should work.

He took my phone

a long time ago.

He'll know it's a trick.

It doesn't matter.

Lori's his... well,

also our... weakness.

It's too dangerous.

Look at what he did

to the machine.

He's... he's unpredictable.

You're in trouble, Adam.

And I wanna help.

It's just part

of my lifeguard nature.

And what about the Clone 2000?

Even if we get the duplex

ignitor from Perfect,

it's not gonna do us

any good in this shape.

Danny?

Sheldon? You came, too!

I figured you weren't

talking to me since...

I kind of got you fired.

None of that matters right now.

You're in trouble,

and we're your wing men.

Plus, we helped

create this mess, too.

Word to that.

So... you think

you can fix it?

Uh, yeah.

But it's gonna take

a lot of duct tape...

and technical genius, of course.

All right, we gotta go.

The show starts

in a couple of hours.

We'll load the machine

into the van.

You guys gotta get it

running during the show.

Show time, whoo-hoo!

Oh, my goodness gracious,

that was awesome sauce, Todd.

Thank you.

Let's give it up for the guy

who stacked a bunch of cups.

Uncle Mitch, why are you hiding?

Listen to 'em.

They think they're gonna see

some young rock star.

But you're like

hashtag greatest magician ever.

Just pretend like you're doing

the trick only for me,

just like we practiced.

You're right.

We've got magic to make.

Oh, um... due

to unforeseen circumstances

that were neither unforeseen

nor circumstantial,

the role of

Vance Vance Revolution

in tonight's performance will be

played by a great performer.

Vance! Vance!

Vance! Vance!

Straight off

his one-week stint

at the Beachwood Retirement

Home, please put your hands

together for the one,

the only...

Magic Mitch!

I heat up,

I can't cool down

You got me spinnin'

'round and 'round

'Round and 'round

and 'round it goes

Where it stops nobody knows

Every time

you call my name

I heat up

like a burnin' flame

Burnin' flame

full of desire

Kiss me baby,

let the fire get higher

Abra-abra-cadabra

I want to reach out

and grab ya

Abra-abra-cadabra

Abracadabra

You make me hot,

you make me sigh

You make me laugh

With the touch

of a velvet glove

Abra-abra-cadabra

I want to reach out

and grab ya

Number one party!

Yeah, let's get the party

started!

Five!

Yes!

Magic Mitch!

I gotta go, excuse me.

Okay.

We did it! We did it!

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

Every dollar counts.

What do I have to do to get

you back here next summer?

Lots of money.

Lori!

There you are.

Uncle Mitch did it.

You guys were amazing.

Mattis is going nuts.

You've changed already.

Yeah, I gotta

get you out of here.

What? Why?

I'll explain on the way.

Adam, where are we going?

What about our plan?

There's been a change in plans.

Ah!

Oh, there's the man of the hour.

Amazing job, Baker.

It looks like you

really did save the park.

Thanks.

Have you seen Lori?

Uh, she was just with you.

You were walking

towards the exit.

What?

Oh, Baker... Baker,

come on, how'd you do it?

Huh, it was mirrors, right?

It had to be mirrors.

Clones.

Clones?

That's funny.

Boy, if that was possible, huh?

Do me a favor, make that out

to Ms. Penny Pants, will ya?

Gillian, Gillian, Gillian.

You have to kick me.

Okay, sure.

Ah!

Oh!

Oooh!

Baker, what's the matter

with you?

Ah!

Ah!

Ah!

Oh, that was seriously low.

He just wants to get rid of me.

Adam doesn't deserve you,

Lori, you belong with me.

No!

You don't know

what you're doing.

Yes, I do.

What?

No, no.

Oh.

Ah.

Guys, he's here.

And Lori's leading him

to the top of the slide.

Be careful, Adam.

Guys, we're out of time.

We gotta get that thing

working now.

Uh.

Copy that.

Oh.

Well, well, well.

If it isn't Adam Baker...

all by his lonesome.

You think you pulled off

your little magic act?

Vance, I don't

have time for this.

This is my park, Baker.

You think I'm gonna let you

and your gang of robo Adams

scare me away?

Hear me?

How are we doing down there?

We're not ready.

She's gotta stall him.

You gotta stall him.

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