Sticky Notes

1

-"Please put all wet food

down the garbage disposal."

"I am sensitive to the

smell of rotting food."

"Don't let the same

dog bite you twice."

"What did you do with

my sunglasses???"

-Alright people,

let's get started.

Put your bags aside.

Now I know you all wake up

every morning and

you brush your teeth...

hopefully.

You drink your coffee and

you smoke your cigarettes.

You put on your little leotard.

And you come to audition.

You come to work.

But what makes today

the day that you book?

What makes today more than

just a job, more than just your

stupid little dancer's

life playing out in a loop?

-Five, six, seven, eight...

One and two.

Three and four.

And five and six...

and seven and eight...

One, two, three, four...

Five, six, seven and eight...

One, two, three, four...

Five, six and seven--

-Athena, how long have you

been auditioning for me?

- Six years.

- Six years?

So I'm going to ask

you one last time:

How bad do you want this?

- Max, you know--

- Shut up!

More than your family?

- Yes--

- More than your friends?

- What friends?

- Alright - you can go.

- Choke me.

Harder!

Like you're raping me.

- What?

- I like it rough.

Harder... Oh God!

Oh my God I'm gonna cum!

Oh God...

Oh God...

I think I'm still drunk...

and bad with names in general.

-Bryan.

- Right.

- Bryan.

- Well Bry, that... that was

fun.

-It was fun.

Athena.

Give it to me.

Don't leave me hanging.

At some point did you

ask me to rape you?

Did that actually happen?

- What if I did?

- I've just been out of

the game for a while.

I don't know if that's

like a thing now.

I don't know if I know

an actress in L.A. who

doesn't smoke cigarettes.

- Why, have you been f***ing

a whole load of actresses?

- Maybe.

- Well it's alright because

I'm not an actress.

- You're not?

- Sex is better when guys think

they're banging actresses.

A kindergarten

teacher is a close second

but a... it's no actress.

- Kindergarten teacher is

pretty sexy actually.

- Well I'm pretty sexy.

- So how long have

you been doing that?

- Not long.

Because I'm not really

a kindergarten teacher.

- You uh--

I think your booty call

is trying to get a hold of you.

-Booty call, no.

Boyfriend, yes.

I'm kidding.

- I can't tell if you're funny

or just bat sh*t crazy.

- You must have a pretty

lame sense of humor

if you think that's funny.

- Who's Jack?

- Dude, I just met you

five minutes ago.

Please don't snoop my phone.

Give it back.

- Tell me who Jack is first.

- Jack-- Jack is my father.

He drunk dials me sometimes.

- Prove it.

- I really don't feel like

talking to him right now.

- It's because you're a liar.

- I only lied about

being an actress.

- And a kindergarten

teacher, so...

track record's not great.

- Oh you want me to

prove it to you?

Fine... fine.

Let's see what Jack,

my father, has to say.

- Athena...

- Alright-- I get it.

- goddess of wisdom, it's your--

It's daddy.

King Jack, the Duke of Soul.

I need you to come to

Florida as soon as possible.

Big News... I have cancer.

- Honey Bunny.

- Did you forget about me?

- No matter how hard I tried, I

could never forget about you.

- Is it just me or did

your b*obs get smaller?

- It's just you.

- A hug- Athena.

Come here...

come on.

- I got it... I'm fine.

- Pink...

- Yeah, it's been

pink for a while.

- Really.

- You wouldn't know that though.

- You haven't visited

me in three years.

What do you think?

So, how's the dancing going?

Huh..

Hey, I hear all the young

girls are shaving off

all their cabbage these days.

Is that true?

- Cabbage patch kids!

- Well I'm not 'all the young

girls.'

So how am I supposed to know?

Well what about you?

You going bald

eagle now or what?

- No.

- No?

Because they say that- tha-

that you feel things better

because of the, uh -

the whatchamacallit.

The nerve endings.

- Nerve endings?

- Yeah.

Yeah, that's what

they're saying.

-If you want everyone to know

you have a small johnson,

- Drive that car!

-Sixty years old.

Six feet.

One hundred and

ninety three pounds.

No history of cancer, no history

of heart disease, no history

of anything aside from a

cataract surgery in 2008

and high cholesterol.

-See Honey Bunny?

Except for the cancer,

I'm in perfect health.

Oh, pay attention.

The doctor is going to show us

a picture of daddy's lungs

and we're going to see

what cancer looks like.

-Based on pet scan, cat scan,

and biopsy today we have

determined that the tumors are

spreading from your lungs to

your lymph nodes which is

typically a pre-cursor for

spreading to the brain.

- Wait, what?

- Why are you taking notes?

What do you think he's going

to give you a test after?

-Tests so far indicate

no brain cancer.

Maybe the doctor can tell us the

name of a good Indian restaurant

where we can get a bite after.

- Jack.

Please1

- She calls me Jack...

I'm her father -

she calls me Jack.

Why don't we try a

version of Papa Bear?

-Why don't we try

listening to the doctor?

-Fine.

What's with the lymbergs-

-Lymph nodes, yes.

Perhaps you could see better

if you removed your sunglasses?

-How'd you know?

- I don't understand.

- We're invisible!

- When he's wearing his

sunglasses indoors, we have

to pretend he's invisible.

Theoretically, you can't tell

him to take them off

because you can't see him.

-Right...

Well, since I can hear your

voice Mr. Morehead, but I can't

see you, I have to assume you're

wearing your invisible glasses

and therefore request you

remove them so we can discuss

the treatment options

for your cancer.

-Wow.

There you are!

Great!

-It's okay to be scared.

-But I'm not.

I have my Honey Bunny here.

You're here...

-Jack.

-I told you.

Call me Papa Bear.

-Jack, I'm serious.

-I don't have many left and

you know how I hate to waste.

-I love daddy.

He's not baddy.

-I love you, princess.

Promise you'll stay

with me, til the end.

-Then you have to do everything

possible to beat this.

Guess I'll switch

to ultra lights.

-No.

It means you have to quit.

For good this time.

For all the nicotine starved

children in Africa, right?

-Twenty-four fifty.

-What?!

Twenty-four dollars and

fifty cents for parking?

-That's what I said, sir.

-Oh, why you gotta do

a brother like that?

I was just getting my lung

cancer test results, which were

positive, I have cancer, and

they didn't validate my ticket.

Can't you help me out?

-There is no validation.

So...

-No, dig this.

Dig this, superfly.

I got a year to

three years to live.

So just help me out-

-Dad, please.

Just pay so we can go home.

-You want to give me

twenty-five bucks for parking?

- Hell no.

- Well then zip it!

Seriously, what

can you do for me?

-If you buy something

at the gift shop,

they validate in there.

-Really?

-Sorry.

Sorry.

Thank you for your patience.

Relax, buddy.

Relax.

Sorry, I have cancer, so...

Here you go.

Thank you, my brother.

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