Stories We Tell Page #3

running out the door for recess,

"going, "Yay!"

And that's what she was like.

It was her first time on the road

on her own for a long time,

and she just savored all of it...

in the dressing room,

on stage,

and then going out afterwards.

She said,

"Come down and have a visit

"and come and see the play. "

During the time that I was there,

what was interesting,

I remember her talking

about Michael a lot,

because Michael was writing

her passionate letters.

And, being Diane,

she read some of it to me,

and I'm going,

"Diane, this is private. "

But the thing

about Diane is that

what was happening

in her life at the moment

was what she talked about.

As she talked,

it felt like this was everything,

that it was totally confessional,

and that you were hearing

the full story of her life.

But I realize now,

it must have been a part.

So what I'm saying

is that she had secrets.

Michael visited her

after the second rehearsal week

and found her

more alive and happy

than she had been

for many years.

He stayed with her two nights,

and they made love again

with all the passion

that separation often brings.

Life was beginning again.

You know all about it,

and you know it's a delusion.

"It's all done with mirrors, mate,"

they used to tell me.

Yes, the mirrors.

The mirrors in which

you can see yourself clearly...

the mirrors

through which you can see

what you really look like.

Diane came back

to her Toronto and Michael

and went back full time

into her casting business

with Johnny as her assistant.

Her relationship,

on a sexual level at least,

with Michael

was really blooming again,

and after the long separation,

they were

almost like newlyweds.

A few weeks later,

she saw her doctor,

who confirmed her pregnancy.

When she came home

to tell Michael,

she was clearly upset.

"I've talked to the doctor,

"and the doctor says it's a bit dangerous

because of my age. "

I said,

"So what are you going to do?"

And she said, "I think I should

seriously consider having an abortion. "

I said, "If that's

the way you feel about it,

"that's okay with me.

"This is your decision.

"It's your body, not mine. "

Diane said that she felt

she should have the baby aborted,

as they could

scarcely afford another.

He was disappointed,

because he did love children...

his in particular...

but he went along

with the abortion idea.

Diane's brother, Bob,

was a doctor.

I do recall being at the office

when I got a call from her.

She was quite desperate,

because she was about 42

and said that she was pregnant,

that it wasn't planned,

that she was desperately worried

about Down syndrome.

And at the time I was, I think,

a bit more pro-life

than pro-choice,

so when your mother called,

I believe that I steered her

towards proceeding

with the pregnancy.

Diane did arrange to go

to the hospital for an abortion,

and we were actually

on the way down

when she changed her mind.

She suddenly said,

"I can't go ahead with this. "

Amazing, isn't it?

I mean, how close we were

to you never existing.

It's almost enough to make you

a anti-abortionist, isn't it?

She seemed excited,

"cause it was something new.

She just loved new, you know?

New was

what she was all about.

If there's such a thing as,

in that spiritual sense,

old souls and young souls,

she was a really young soul,

I would say.

I don't think your mother was elated

that she was pregnant.

I do not think so.

No, I do not think so.

I do not. I do not.

After Sarah's birth,

Diane and Michael

did not act together again

until the play Filumena

by Eduardo de Filippo.

Diane was to play the title role

with Michael as the husband.

Someone had seen them together

in The Condemned of Altona

and had decided it would be nice

to see them together

on stage once more.

It was a fine gesture,

and they were delighted

to do the piece.

Filumena was the play

that became the movie

Marriage Italian Style

with Marcello Mastroianni

and Sophia Loren.

It's a fascinating story,

because they've lived together,

and she wants him to marry her.

Tell me.

She, the Sophia Loren part,

has been a prostitute,

and somehow

over that period of time,

she has had three sons.

He doesn't even know

she has three sons.

And she says to him,

"I need to get you

to legitimize my children.

"Will you marry me?"

And he says,

"Why would I marry you?"

And she says...

"Oh. "

Domenico tries to find out

which of the lads is his,

but he totally fails,

since each is

like him in some ways

and completely different in others.

In desperation,

Domenico marries Filumena

so that his true son

can have the family he needs

and a future that one

of his blood deserves.

Filumena's final words are,

"Children are children,

and they are all equal. "

And so Diane and Michael

played out their final act together,

though not knowing

that it was just that.

Did anyone know

she was going to die?

Yeah, we all knew.

Did anyone know

she was gonna die?

- When she had cancer?

- Mm-hmm.

Yeah. Did you know?

No, you didn't know.

She was just a mess.

She was very,

very, very frightened.

With so much energy,

all of her energy

was going into her uncertainty

and her fear and unhappiness.

And when I hugged her,

it was like holding a...

I don't know if you ever have

held a bird in your hand,

the way it's terrified

and you just feel its heartbeat.

Do you know what I mean?

She was just shaking.

Did you get the sense

that she knew she was dying?

Yeah.

Yeah, she knew.

I don't think Diane ever fully realized.

We never talked

about any of the things,

because we didn't think

it was gonna happen.

When she came

out of that last operation,

I came home one day

and she was out in the driveway,

scraping down a table

so that she could repaint it

for the house.

So I think she

didn't have any real sense.

I said to her, "What on earth

"are you doing out here

doing the table?"

And she said, "We got to get

all these tables done.

"Then we can have them

all varnished

"the same color and everything. "

That's not a person

who's, as it was, turned out,

four or five weeks away from death.

That's a person who's still planning

how the house is gonna look.

As it progressed,

she was more and more tired,

and the treatments were

harder and harder on her.

Man, she fought like crazy,

you know.

What was it...

Can you describe

her memorial service at all?

It just seemed

like a really big memorial service,

and I just remember

a lot of the people that spoke

were Canadian

sort of celebrity people,

not necessarily the people

that were closest to Mom in her life,

but I remember thinking

as I was watching it,

"Gee, it's a good

memorial service,

"and I think it's kind of nice

"to be in show business

when you die,

"because the people that speak

are good at speaking. "

She was very, very popular,

so, as you can imagine, there were

many, many people there,

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