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Strange Brew Page #10
- PG
- Year:
- 1983
- 90 min
- 619 Views
Bob Hey, got me out of here will you! I got a whiz to throw!
Doug
Boy, that was some belch! We thought you were going to take a leak!
Bob
What do you mean? Just get me out of here! Come on you hoser. I'd
have saved you some, but I had to save Pam's life, eh?
Doug
Ok, let me see here. [tries to grab Bob]
Bob
Ow! Not there!
Doug
Ok, how about here?
Bob
Hey, that feels good!
[cut to cafeteria. Pam and Henry watch as the ghost of John, aided by
some 'nice' special effects, warns them to stop the beer delivery to
Oktoberfest.]
Pam
[to Henry] I think I'd better go. [they hug]
[cut to outside shot of brewery and institute, where John's ghost
causes an explosion which has no apparent result on the structure of
the institute.]
[cut to vat room]
Inspector
What was that?
Doug
It wasn't me!
Policeman 6
The roof just blew off the institute. It's on fire.
Doug
On fire? Geez. [to Bob] Hey, can you hold it a minute?
Bob
Yeah, buy hurry will you? I have got to go!
Doug
Here, give me a hand. I've got an idea...
[cut to outside of institute, where Bob has put out the fire and is
zipping up his pants, which are now normal size.]
Doug
Are you done yet?
Bob
Yeah.
Doug
Beauty.
Fireman
You did a fine job son. What took you two minutes would have taken us
two hours. If you ever want a job at the fire department you come
and see me and you've got it!
Bob
What about my brother? Can he get a job?
Inspector
You boys want to come with us?
Doug
Where are you going?
Inspector
Oktoberfest.
Bob
Geez, I've had enough beer for awhile...
LaRose
Two truckloads of that bad beer went there this morning!
Pam
We have to stop the people from drinking it!
Inspector
That's a thirsty crowd. It won't be easy.
Doug
Ok, I've got an idea, but we have to go home first. Ok?
Inspector
You guys go with them [to policemen 5 & 6].
Bob
How come we're going home?
Doug
Don't worry about it. Just put these clothes on...
[cut to Oktoberfest where the truck are arriving from the brewery.]
Announcer
Ah. Elsinore beer. Will go right over there.
Workman
Ok. You've got it.
[cut to McKenzie home where Bob wields a policeman's megaphone.]
Bob
Ok, all cops, get out of your cars. [cops get out of their cars] Ok,
I want to take a head count. Like maybe we'll have some breakfast.
Some back bacon sandwiches while we was waiting. Ok, another thing,
you all went through the stop sign back there, and that's a moving
violation, and my brother and I - we have a lot of parking tickets...
Doug
[arrives with Hosehead] Ok!
Bob
Ok, my brother's here, so all cops, come on up!
Doug
[to Hosehead] Sit! Sit! [to Inspector] Got a map? [the Inspector
gives the map to Bob, who shows it to Hosehead] Ok, this is like an
aerial view. Ok, take the 401 to here, then take highway 6 north, ok?
It goes right up here. That's the offramp.
Bob
Don't forget to take a right at highway 6, eh?
Doug
Ok? So when you get there you can have all the free beer and sausages
you can eat, eh?
[Hosehead, painted like a skunk, takes off down the street, then flies
into the air and heads for Oktoberfest. A red cape unfurls on his
back.]
[cut to Oktoberfest, main tent]
Announcer
Can I get everyone's attention please? We are very happy to announce
that today all the beer is free. [the crowd roars it's approval] It
is courtesy of our good friends at Elsinore Brewery. [the crowd roars
again and the band strikes up a polka. The beer flows freely.]
[After a few minutes of revelry, Hosehead bursts through the tent roof
Reveler
SKUNK! [Everyone clears out of the tent. Minutes later the police
arrive, with Bob and Doug.]
Policeman 7 [to Inspector]
I wouldn't go in there. There's a BIG skunk in there.
Inspector
We know about that. It's a Toronto skunk, and it's my jurisdiction.
[they enter the tent, where Hosehead gorges himself on beer and
beauts] Well boys, it worked. I can't thank you enough. I really
can't. That's some dog of yours, too. He's really hungry, isn't he?
Doug
He's always hungry, eh?
Bob
We couldn't feed him, eh?, because we were in jail.
Doug
Yeah, you put us there. Thanks a lot, eh?
Bob
Yeah, we were innocent, too, eh?
Inspector
Just a second, boys, just a second! Now maybe we can drop the criminal
charges, but that mental incompetence thing will be tough to beat.
Pam
I'll take care of them. From now on they're working full time at the
brewery for me and Rosie! Come on!
LaRose
Let's go, dear!
Doug [to Bob]
Let's go, dear!
Bob
See you, inspector!
Doug
Yeah, bye!
[cut to outside the tent]
Doug [tripping over box]
Pam, we were wondering, eh?, like, just exactly what is wrong with the
beer, eh? Is it poison? Could it kill you?
LaRose
No, no. It's not a poison. It's more like a drug. It can wear off in
time, like it did with me, eh?
Doug
Oh, well, we were thinking that since we're employees of the brewery
now, eh?, perhaps it would be a good idea for us to take all the
contaminated beer back to the brewery, where it can be properly
disposed of, eh?
Pam
You know how to handle one of those big rigs?
Bob
Geez, it's a ten speed...[Doug thumps him.]
Doug
Yeah, sure, of course. Like, we drive them all the time.
Pam
Well take off, eh?
[Bob and Doug run for the truck]
Bob
You're lying, eh?
Doug
It's ok, don't worry. Just trust me.
Bob
You're lying.
Doug
Just come here, I want to talk to you.
Bob
You're just tricking me.
Doug
Come here...
Bob
If you sucker me in...
Doug
[grabs Bob] You take right off!
Bob
I knew you'd sucker me in! You don't know how to drive this thing!
Doug
I do so! It's just a ten speed, that's 5 speed times two!
Bob
We're going to crash! We're going to be in the water again!
Doug
Take off! We are not going to crash, eh? There's no way I'll crash
this, this is a beer truck, eh?
[They both get the idea and hop in the truck. With minor difficulty,
they 'take off'!]
///////////////////////// CREDITS /////////////////////////////
Brewmeister Smith MAX VON SYDOW
Ted BRIAN McCONNACHIE
Gertrude JILL FRAPIER
The Prosecutor THICK WILSON
Ballif ROBERT WINDSOR
Man in the alley DAVID CLEMENT
Pensioneer PADDY SAMPSON
Recepcionist DIANE DOUGLASS
Bald con JAMES CONROY
MC at Oktoberfest IUJA IUJEVSKI
Nurses MARY CHARLOTTE WILCOX MAGGIE BUTTERFIELD
Policemen DAVID RIGBY DENIS FOREST JOHN KELLY DICK GRANT GEORGE
STINTON:
Hospital orderlies THOM BELL CHRISTOPHER BENSON JOHN STONEHAM
Hosehead the Dog BUDDY the DOG
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"Strange Brew" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 1 Sep. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/strange_brew_745>.
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