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Yeah, you see, you know now.

Okay, I play,

because I'm the only one who's got quick

enough hands to do the f***ing patty-cake.

Graham, reject me one more time,

see what happens... just one time.

See watch.

Whoa, God, you're pinching

me, you f***ing weirdo!

Tommy?

Oh, my God.

Were you worried they

were going to send you

back across the border?

I'm not Mexican, dude.

I'm... I'm from Illinois.

Same difference.

Happy birthday, Graham!

You don't get anything you want.

What does it matter?

Because we were going to have

the f***ing four of us, man!

She's gonna ride with us and

then we're gonna drop her off.

You can't... I don't understand

why you're so mad, Graham?

It's not... it's not a big deal.

See, you're not a big deal.

Tommy Kay's down with it.

Bro, I'm gonna f***in'

sock you in the mouth.

Tommy Kay, you weren't

even gonna f***ing come.

You were gonna f***ing flip pizzas

for the rest of the f***in' week.

Yeah, you weren't

gonna f***ing come.

All right, I'm sorry.

Can you stay quiet for

a second? I need a vent.

I don't ha... and back to me.

I don't have a fade. I don't

feel comfortable with the shirt.

I can tell when you're

lying to me, go ahead.

Okay, go ahead. You feel happy now?

This is the... this is the

hospital where Graham was born.

Quick, get a shot of that.

That's beautiful.

It's brown too.

We goin' to Vegas?

Let's go to Vegas.

Yes, we're going to Vegas.

Let's get pumped up.

Whatever.

Vegas on three, Cam.

On three... Vegas.

One, two, three.

Go.

All right, for

everybody's information,

moving on down the road.

We got a little stowaway in

the back seat now though,

because somebody just

had to tag along.

Guilty, right there.

You know you wanted me

to come, don't lie.

Oh, and I came bearing gifts.

What are you drawing over there?

Oh, that's so sweet.

If...

them two were to have a kid,

this is how it would look like.

I agree.

His name is Pepe.

Oh, sh*t.

We're all gonna die, we're

never gonna make it to Vegas.

Okay, say something.

Um,

Why are you here,

where did you come from?

Because I am going to

go see my boyfriend.

And you guys are giving me a ride.

So kindly, my good friends.

Can I draw a dinosaur

on your cheek?

He's holdin' the camera.

You're holdin' the camera,

it's my turn to play.

You're not here.

You need to practice invisibility...

Okay, I'm tired of the attitude.

We're pretending that

you don't exist.

Why are you guys so mean then?

You exist, I see you.

This was a dude's trip.

Dude's trip only.

And you are gay for sure now.

How am I gay?

You're sucking your banana.

Just because he has feelings, okay?

Gay, gay.

Stop!...

Yo, fuckface, film me humpin'

the f***in' stegosaur.

The what?

Get it, dude.

What'd he say?

Yeah, you like that?

Yeah, man.

You gotta thrust the hips, though.

Hey, easy dude, don't

bust a nut on this thing.

Hey, Graham.

Oh, boy.

You wanna hump this thing?

Yes, I wanna hump that thing.

Oh, yeah, get some.

Hey, wait your turn, buddy.

All right, all right.

No pleasure for the dinosaur.

You're up, buddy.

And it's a guy.

I don't do this sh*t.

Short and sweet, just like

your mother likes it.

That's great, you're talkin'

about my mom again.

What, man, she has soft hands.

Uh, that's really weird.

Why is that weird?

It's not like I'm saying

it sexually, okay?

I just mean, her hands feel like they're

dipped in shea butter or something.

It's actually quite amazing.

Well, how would you

feel if I showed her

this f***in' tape?

I would say, "Mrs. Cohen, you

have silky, soft, smooth hands.

And I love you."

Okay.

Let's get outta here.

I'm not f***in'...

Ready?

I can't believe those two

haven't f***ed, dude.

What, yeah, they have.

What?

What?

When?

Holy sh*t, wait a second.

Hey, how come you guys didn't

tell me you've screwed before?

What?

Cat's out of the bag,

just answer the question.

Hey, you know what?

This is perfect, this makes sense.

Yeah, okay, turn the camera off.

It's evolution.

I'm being serious right now.

Cameron, come on,

this sh*t's not cool.

No, I'm being seriou...

Let my talk to you

for a min... oh!

Uh!

I'm telling you,

you guys make a c...

Sorry, buddy.

Thanks, still love you.

I don't tell you guys everything.

Oh, f*** off, it's about the group.

I tell you everything.

Hey, you guys, this was

something personal.

If there's inner-group f***ing,

I have a right to know

and so does the documentary.

Not only do you tell everybody, hey, but

now I'm gonna tell it in front of Capri

and on camera.

Guys, guys, guys, hello?

You guys are a...

So, there, no, it's not.

What the f*** is going on?

It's none of your business either.

No, it is my business

because both of you are my friend

and I think both of you

make a perfect couple.

And I don't know what

the f*** you're doing.

I mean, I don't know what

you're doing with that guy.

You've known him your whole life.

I don't understand what is

stopping you from committing.

Why would we want to ruin that?

Our friendship, our relationship.

Graham, shut up, please.

Yeah, there's no f***ing trust

'cause you didn't trust

me enough to tell me.

I think that it's not fair...

You can't tell me?

I f***in' told you and you're...

So what's the big deal

if Tommy Kay knows?

Let's hear what Tommy

Kay has to say.

I think it's not fair that

you're keeping Luke on hold.

And I think it's not fair that

you are still single, my friend.

I got side girls.

And that is just...

that's just...

Why am I keeping him on hold?

I mean, a friendship

isn't good enough?

I think your boyfriend

should be your best friend.

But why can't I have my best

friend and my boyfriend?

And have him always here, always...

Wow, always here.

No, I don't mean like that.

Do you live in like,

never-never land?

I don't mean it like that,

obviously... now, look you guys.

What do you think about

Luke's side girls?

Oh, yeah.

Well, that shouldn't affect you

because he should be able to f***

as many girls as he wants

'cause you guys are not in

a committed relationship.

I'm going on a f***ing

spree tonight.

F***, yes, amen!

Okay, well I thought you

guys were doing me a favor

and I didn't know you were going

to give me such a hassle about it

and make things awkward.

While everything's awkward,

I'm gonna tell you about this thing.

This story.

This awkward story.

So, when we were actually

doing the dirty,

Why do have... no.

She's on top and she's like...

"Hey, I want you to F

me in my little P."

And I was like,

"What the f***?"

You're such a**holes!

You're such an a**hole.

I'm not talking to you the

rest of the trip. Let go!

Did she actually say D and P?

Or was she like...

That is some kinky sh*t.

I'm not talking to you

the rest of the trip.

Ow, you're hurting my wrist.

Please put your D in my PPs.

I wonder what little Jakey-poo

would think of that?

Oh, my God, that wasn't easy.

I'm not talking to you

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