Suing the Devil
My name is Luke O'Brien.
I work as a salesman by day.
At night, I attend the
Billy Simon's night law school
in Sydney, Australia.
It's been my goal in life
to become a lawyer,
until.
to question my own existence.
I wonder why the good Lord lets
Satan get away with so much.
This has been the
worst year of my life.
And today the country was rocked
by yet another mass murder.
This time a gunman killed 15 people
at the hospital before taking his own life.
That's unacceptable.
No, that's ridiculous.
How does an account disappear?
Well some human garbage
has stolen my money and you...
Well what kind of idiots
do you have working there?
Luke! Please don't!
Babe.
Babe, babe are you okay?
I'm sorry.
In other news, gas prices
are still rising
and oil companies
offer no apologies.
God,
are you following
any of this?
My mother was killed
by a drunk driver, Gwen,
the same drunk driver
is now free on the streets,
with all the other filth out there
including the ones who stole our money.
You know, if I could just have
I'd crush him to bits.
And that same filth
that murdered my Mother!
I'm off to the law library.
Everyone needs compassion,
love that's never failing.
Let mercy fall on me.
Don't tell me I left
the bullets at home!
And then, something happened.
Of all things, a Bible fell out
of the glove compartment.
Had my back slid so far from God
that I was willing to kill a man?
Why couldn't I forgive him?
Why?
How did I get to
what I've become?
A man who hated people.
Instead of loving
my neighbor.
Who am I?
As I drove home, I realized
what a spiritual battle we all face.
Satan comes at you like a roaring lion,
brothers and sisters,
don't forget that!
The greatest lie he ever invented was
to convince you that he doesn't exist.
And I believe in the devil.
That's when it hit me.
Every problem
in the world today
is somehow related
to this evil being.
It's all lies and deception.
And because of this snake
the world continues
spiraling downward.
And it dawned on me
that I'd do something rash.
If the world was going to hell,
I may as well take some demons out!
It was on this day that
Yes, you heard me right.
Expose Satan!
And I can show the tactics
of the Devil better than anybody!
Luke O'Brien vs. Satan?
That's right.
Satan?
Yeah, that's right.
Is there a last name?
I didn't exactly have Satan's address
to send him a copy of the lawsuit,
but I did make it all the way
to a court hearing with a judge.
Luke O'Brien vs. Satan?
Yes, your honor.
You're suing Satan?
Crazy!
Order!
Yes, your honor.
You're aware that you're in the
international court of human rights.
Your honor, Satan have violated
every human right known to man!
- Are you seeing a shrink?
- No.
- Taking any medication?
- Yes.
No, I used to.
Mr. O'Brien, you are wasting the
court's time with this frivolous lawsuit.
Your honor, I can prove that
Satan is a viable defendant.
Under Dogar vs. Marlboro,
and section 10-3 of the
international civil liberties suit...
Right, I understand.
And of course Satan has failed
to respond to this notice.
I'd like to submit a default
judgment upon him.
And how do you expect
to serve that notice?
Well, I listed it in
the newspaper actually.
You might want to try hell
next time, just a tip.
I knew she was going
to dismiss the case.
I just wanted to vent
my frustration with Satan!
So what she said next
took me completely by surprise.
You're going to have to give the
defendant, in this case Satan, notice.
Find a process server,
I'll give you 30 more days.
But your honor, I can't!
Well, I won't allow a default
unless the defendant has been served!
Next case!
- What's this?
- This is a lawsuit against Satan.
- What is this, a joke?
- No, it's not.
If he works here, I want you
to give that to him.
We have 70 lawyers who
work here, take your pick.
Go for it.
Hey bud,
even works here, huh?
You just give that to him
if you see him, alright?
Hey, I run a respectable
business here, okay?
Yeah, we've got strippers, drunks
and gamblers, but you know what?
I don't permit smoking
inside, okay?
Are you guys Satan worshipers?
Just in case, can you give this
to Satan if you see him around?
Thanks.
I see you've served notice
of process at a law film,
strip club, overseas investment
firm and an oil company.
Why stop there?
Did you try serving
a used car yard?
If Satan's anywhere,
it's probably there.
Yeah, I didn't think
of that one, your honor.
I'd like to file a default judgment
against Satan.
Default judgment?
Yes, your honor. I want
the record to show...
that Satan has judgment
against him for 8 trillion dollars.
I'm going to dismiss this case
on a technicality
and because you're nuts.
And then the most
unimaginable thing happened.
I'm also going to
penalize you because...
Because why?
I'm here, your honor.
Ever get that strange feeling
that a hoax might be real after all?
And who are you?
- Satan, your honor.
- Oh, your honor.
Nice try.
So you two are
in this together, right?
I'm here to answer the
summonsed, your honor.
And I wade the lack
of process from Mr. Luke O'Brien.
What is this?
That's great,
you almost had me there.
Oh, made my day!
Am I punked?
Where are the cameras?
I'm afraid it's quite serious,
your honor.
Well I don't find it
very amusing.
Neither do I.
Can you prove you're Satan?
Can you prove I'm not?
What is going on here?
Oh my goodness, it's
so hot in here! Bailiff!
Bailiff? Why is the heat up?
What do you think?
Oh, my goodness! Bailiff!
What have you done
to the heat? Check it!
So, suppose you are
who you say you are,
do you realize the extent
of what you're saying?
The earth is mine.
And I will defend myself.
Do you have legal representation?
Do I have legal representation?
I know what you're thinking,
so don't say it.
Was this man
really the devil?
Well, I must say you've got
a lot of guts boy. Suing me?
I mean, do you really know
what you're letting yourself in for?
You're not really Satan,
are you?
Oh, and you're not Lukey Dukey,
are you, idiot?
Look, you better have a bunch of good lawyers
because I'm going to take you down.
You're a little pipsqueak.
Do you know how insignificant you are?
I mean, with one...
I could send you off into the abyss
in a little red corvette.
Hey, I've got God on my side, okay?
And He created you.
Ugh, got a card?
- I don't have one.
- No card?
Well, here's mine.
Call me, anytime.
Hey, don't smoke it.
I'll see you in court, baby.
Oh yeah, nice
magic trick, dude!
Someone I could trust.
There was only
one person I knew.
Get lost.
Come on, Mel! That's
no way to talk to a friend.
Friends don't ask friends
to sue Satan.
I really need your help
Translation
Translate and read this script in other languages:
Select another language:
- - Select -
- 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
- 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
- Español (Spanish)
- Esperanto (Esperanto)
- 日本語 (Japanese)
- Português (Portuguese)
- Deutsch (German)
- العربية (Arabic)
- Français (French)
- Русский (Russian)
- ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
- 한국어 (Korean)
- עברית (Hebrew)
- Gaeilge (Irish)
- Українська (Ukrainian)
- اردو (Urdu)
- Magyar (Hungarian)
- मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
- Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Italiano (Italian)
- தமிழ் (Tamil)
- Türkçe (Turkish)
- తెలుగు (Telugu)
- ภาษาไทย (Thai)
- Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
- Čeština (Czech)
- Polski (Polish)
- Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Românește (Romanian)
- Nederlands (Dutch)
- Ελληνικά (Greek)
- Latinum (Latin)
- Svenska (Swedish)
- Dansk (Danish)
- Suomi (Finnish)
- فارسی (Persian)
- ייִדיש (Yiddish)
- հայերեն (Armenian)
- Norsk (Norwegian)
- English (English)
Citation
Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:
Style:MLAChicagoAPA
"Suing the Devil" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 17 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/suing_the_devil_19070>.
Discuss this script with the community:
Report Comment
We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.
If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly.
Attachment
You need to be logged in to favorite.
Log In