Summer of Blood Page #6

can you come back tonight?

No, I need to talk to you now,

please, Mr. Sparrow.

Come back tonight,

Mr. Leiberman!

Mr. Sparrow, need to talk

to you now, please.

Can you come back tonight?

Please come to the door,

Mr. Sparrow.

Please come back tonight!

I need to collect the rent,

Mr. Sparrow.

Goddamnit!

Oh f***!

What is it?

I need to collect the rent,

Mr. Sparrow.

What rent?

What are you talking about?

The rent, Mr. Sparrow. Your rent,

it's very late. It's the first time.

We haven't had this problem before,

but I need to collect the rent.

Okay, give me a second, okay.

- Okay.

- Okay, just hold on!

Goddamnit!

F***!

Oh God, its hot as sh*t!

It burns!

Global warming f***ing sucks!

Come back tomorrow,

Mr. Leiberman!!!

Mr. Sparrow, I need to

talk to you right now!

I know, the rent, it can

wait one more 24-hour period!

I'll put five percent

on it extra, f***!

Mr. Sparrow,

please open the door!

We need to talk now,

Mr. Sparrow!

Okay, I'm coming!

God, rent, money!

It's all about money!

F***!

This door knob needs to be

fixed, Mr. Leiberman.

I haven't said

anything about it

because I didn't want

to trouble you.

Come here, come here.

I want you to look at me for second

so we can talk about

the rent,

because that's why you're here,

to talk about the rent.

- Ok, I understand.

- Yes.

I need to collect the rent,

Mr. Sparrow. Yes, yes.

Oh that.

Yeah, don't worry about that.

I have really bad back acne,

so when I lie down

to go to sleep,

it's like bubble wrap.

It's like, "Pop, pop!"

Instead of the bubbles being filled with

air, they're filled with blood and pus.

But that's not what

you want to talk about.

- You want to talk about the rent and I'm okay with that.

- It's the rent.

- I'm very concerned, Mr. Sparrow.

- I know you're concerned,

but look at me very carefully

right now as I tell you this.

Right now, because...

No, no, look at me.

There is no rent, right.

There's not going

to be any rent.

The rent does not exist.

I don't understand.

Okay,

look at me for a second.

We live in a venal world,

I understand that.

It's a world were people

like me judge people like you,

for being the way that you are

and looking the way that you do

and believing the things

that you believe.

- It's okay.

- I don't understand.

I'm talking about

judgment here, okay.

I judge you,

you judge me.

I will never judge you,

Mr. Sparrow,

as long as you pay the rent.

Yeah, I know because

you've got to pay your bills.

I'm sure you do.

But you could take care of

your family without my rent.

Don't you think

you could do that?

How many children do you have?

Twelve!

- Twelve children, wow. You have some virile sperm.

- Yes. - I've got chunky semen.

You know,

with a family that big,

you could probably

start an army.

You could probably take over North

Korea or something like that.

You could probably take over all

the real estate in North Korea.

I am not interested

in North Korea.

I am only interested

in my properties

here in Bushwick, Mr. Sparrow.

I need to collect the rent!

Okay, I understand,

now you understand me, okay.

There is no rent.

You're not charging me

anymore rent,

and I'm not paying

anymore rent.

You understand what I'm

telling you, Mr. Leiberman?

I do, Mr. Sparrow.

Very good, very good.

And you're okay with what

I'm saying, Mr. Leiberman?

I can't believe

I'm saying this but yes,

I am, Mr. Sparrow.

Terrific, that's great!

That's awesome.

What a great understanding.

That's terrific.

Okay, now that we have

all that figured out,

let me escort you out

of the building.

How do you say

"Good day" in Yiddish?

"Good Day."

Well, if I could

pronounce that, I would,

but I can't, but have

a nice day regardless.

And say hello

to your twelve children

and your wife who I'm sure

is very, very tired.

So have a good day.

Thank you very much!

You know, my ex-girlfriend Jody

and I use to argue about this.

I use to have this fantasy,

this exact thing,

where I would be in bed

with three beautiful women,

and she thought it was

really misogynistic.

So we use to argue about it,

but this isn't misogynistic.

Misogyny means to hate women.

I'm loving on three women.

So I never understood

that argument.

Anyway, let's get it on again.

I think that would be

a good idea.

Sure.

- Okay.

- Yeah.

Let's try something different.

I got a couple of ideas in mind.

Like what?

I was thinking you, Blake, could lie on your

back and Denise, you could sit on Blake's face.

Samantha you could

go down on Blake

and I would take you

from behind.

That does sound

a bit misogynistic.

You think so?

Yeah, it just feels like

you're using us as sex objects.

No, no, no.

We'd all be connected, that's the point.

Right, but you're giving everyone orders.

No.

I'm offering suggestions,

I'm not...

You're exploiting us.

I'm not exploiting you all.

What was your

ex-girlfriend like?

What's that?

Your ex-girlfriend.

Jody?

Yeah.

She was... she was great.

She was really smart

and independent,

and really creative sexually

and she was amazing actually.

So why'd you break-up?

Yeah, let's change

the subject, okay.

No, maybe you should call her.

No, let's not talk

about this anymore.

Let's try this instead.

I'll lie on my back.

Denise you sit on my face.

I figure Blake, I could prop

my legs up like this

and you could fist me,

and then that way

I'll be the object.

And then Samantha,

you could get a copy of um...

I've got a copy of

Ginsberg's Howl

on the bookshelf.

Maybe you could just read

that while we're doing that.

Okay.

...He's a strange guy

but nice, right?

No, he's totally cool...

Erik.

Hey, baby.

Don't call me that.

I mean, hey, honey love.

What are you doing here?

I just came by here to get some more of

my stuff. You don't have anything here.

I'm pretty sure I left my

Culture Club record up there.

How you doing?

- Great, man. Good to see you. - Good to see you too.

- It's been too long. You look handsome. Did you get a facelift?

You look even more

handsome than before.

You look even

fatter than before.

Well, the only reason I look

fatter is because your mom

had a liposuction and I ate

all the fat off her fat ass.

My mom's dead.

Hey listen,

that shirt looks really great.

Did you get that at Abercrombie and Fitch

because fat people aren't allow to wear them,

that's why I'm going to

burn them to the ground.

Okay. Erik, this is

totally inappropriate.

You need to leave now.

I think the appropriate

usage of that word is

"unappropriate", okay.

- Can I just talk to her alone, why you go molest a child?

- Actually no.

That's so funny,

such a comedian.

I see what you saw in him.

I saw a poster of your

face and a girl's vagina.

- Oh, really, I saw a poster...

- No, I didn't mean that.

It wasn't a girl's vagina,

it was a monkey's vagina.

Jerry Garcia, is that your

f***ing name, reincarnated?

Jerry Garcia was a god

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