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That's kissin'!

More champagne!

Give the boys another 20 bucks.

When you start running low, holler.

There's more where that came from.

Open up a bottle for yourselves too.

It ain't every day when Goldie opens

a joint in Denver and gets married to boot.

Wish we could get off the train with you.

That's one wedding I'd like to see.

- Yes, sir, yes, ma'am. Sure would.

- I wish you could too, boys.

- Right, girls?

- Yeah!

Did you ever see such a bunch

of beautiful bridesmaids

in your whole damn life?

Penny for your thoughts, lad.

They ain't worth it.

I was just thinking, better get some sleep.

We got a busy day in Denver tomorrow.

Busy wedding day!

Good night, baby.

- What's the next stop?

- Purgatory.

- Purgatory?

- Mm. Mining town. It ain't much.

Wake me when we get to Purgatory.

- Just me, not Miss Goldie.

- Yes, sir.

Man!

- The midnight on time, Ez?

- See what I'm writing, don't you?

- The midnight on time, Ez?

- I don't know more than you, Mr Barton.

But it seems kinda high class

to write down that she is.

Don't look like you're wearin' a gun

under that coat. Smart.

Ever heard of a man gettin' into trouble

mindin' his own business, Ez?

How am I expected to mind

my own business? I sent the telegram.

Telegrams are supposed to be private.

From the telegrapher?

I sure would feel a lot better

with weight on my hip, Pa.

If that party mentioned in the telegram

shows up, you'd best be unarmed.

Ez, I told you to mind...

- The Sidewinder!

- Your sister's name is Patience.

Patience!

You stay out of this, Pa.

- What the hell are you doing?

- Teachin' them jackass miners a lesson.

Oh, you give me that!

I've told you not to shoot at people!

They had it comin'.

One of them said something vile.

He said "Does your mother

know you're out, Cecilia?"

You consider that grounds

for shootin' up the town?

- I knew what he meant.

- I sure as hell don't.

They are trying to ruin my good name.

I have sworn to go to Miss Hunter's

College on the Hudson River, New York,

for young ladies of good family.

Nothing's gonna stop me!

Except you killin' somebody.

- I only shoot at riffraff.

- You shot at us.

- I missed you.

- You couldn't hit a bull with a banjo.

- Watch that smart mouth.

- Hit him, Pa.

If I hit anybody, it's gonna be you.

Take her home, Oriville.

- Take your damn hands off me.

- Don't let her stop for a beer.

- She gets mean when she drinks.

- How come you called that girl Patience?

Can hear her a long way off

when the wind's right.

Ain't enough late

to make it worthwhile changin' the board.

Sounds downright peaceful, don't it?

Calm before the storm,

if that certain party is on board.

Yeah.

Well?

We'll say we know

you didn't get off at Purgatory.

We don't know where you did get off,

but we know it wasn't Purgatory.

Don't open up, boys. Nothing but mail

for Purgatory. No passengers gettin' off.

It's bad manners to call the conductor

a liar, so let's not. No sense openin' up.

Nobody's gettin' off at Purgatory.

Evenin'. Or mornin', rather.

It's one in the morning.

- I got a watch.

- Just get off the train?

Ever hear of an eagle pickin' up a grown

man and carryin' him across country?

- No, I can't say that I have.

- Well, you have now.

I come by eagle.

That's him, Pa. If only I had my rifle,

I'd nail him between the shoulder blades.

That'd be murder.

And it might be the wrong man.

It's gotta be him. Big, mean and ugly,

and sneakin' off the train. What's next?

Give him time to get a room,

then ask some questions at the hotel.

Let's wait in the Chinaman's back room.

- Pa, she's gonna get her another beer.

- So am I!

Can't you read? That sign says

"Take a key, go to bed. "

- That sign?

- That sign... must've gotten a few strays.

We got lots of shooting in this town.

Here, register.

- Your handle and your hometown.

- Already did.

Smith. Is that your real name?

Not that I'm nosey.

- Give me a room.

- Ah, keep your shirt on!

Oh, say, that's real silk, isn't it?

You must be rich. Well?

- Well, what?

- You rich? Not that I'm curious.

- Is there another hotel in this town?

- Ah, keep your shirt on.

Your silk shirt.

That's a good one!

Come on.

Just as good a service as in

the Palmer House in Chicago. Come on.

Watch your step here. Come on.

Your silk shirt!

If you hear a lot of screamin',

don't pay no heed.

One of the miners

has delirium tremens every now and then.

His name's Smith too.

Maybe you're related!

There's two ways you can have

the windows - open or closed.

Closed is hot.

Open, there's flies that eat you alive.

- Let me help you unpack.

- Never mind.

No trouble. No trouble at all.

What's them?

I grabbed the wrong suitcase.

- What are these things?

- That's a Kewpie doll.

I won one at the state fair

the time I went to Denver all by myself.

- And got rolled by some floozie!

- Oh, shut up.

Now, stop it. Let's go ask

Martha Perkins about this man.

- Have you got change for a $100 bill?

- No, I haven't.

I'll get it changed someplace

and pay you when I get back.

Patience Barton, you get away from there!

I could tell by that stupid face

he would have no imagination. Smith!

You couldn't expect him to go around

signing his own name in his business.

Ah! Patience Barton,

you give me my key back.

Mister!

Wanna buy a pair of spurs?

No. I wonder...

These ain't hardly been used.

Gotta lot of wear left in 'em.

Outlast a dozen horses.

I don't ride.

Has this town got a doctor?

Big husky fella like you.

What do you need a doctor for?

Well, I'll tell the doctor that. If I tell you,

I'd just get tired of repeatin' it.

Has this town got a doctor?

I don't know what I'm gonna say

to the man when he sees this suitcase.

- You'll think of somethin'.

- Might have a secret compartment.

I been through it three times.

I told you, he got the wrong suitcase.

Oh... I'm telling you,

the man got the wrong suitcase.

You let go of me!

Hey, Pa, make him let go!

I got him! I got him, Pa.

Did you promise to marry that girl,

or somethin' of the sort?

Not even somethin' of the sort.

I don't rightly know the lady.

I stand with a bunch of fellas

in front of the saloon. She walks by.

I said "Does your mother know

you're out, Cecilia?" Witty, like.

She was gonna blow us to kingdom come.

So many fast-weavin' cowboys.

She just likes to shoot people.

It seems to be all clear.

- Where did you say that doctor was?

- I still don't see what a big, healthy fella...

He's probably shootin' pool in the saloon.

- At one in the morning?

- This is a real upside-down town.

They've got three shifts of miners

and they come on and off work all day.

- He answers to the name of Doc Schultz.

- Thanks.

- Sure you don't want to buy the spurs?

- No.

Hey, a cowboy's got to be pretty down

to be willin' to sell his horse irons.

My horse went first, then my saddle.

But I'm sober now.

What I've got left is these here spurs...

and a mighty empty belly.

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