Support Your Local Gunfighter Page #2

Oh, well, here. You eat on me, huh?

Thanks, friend. The name's Jug. Jug May.

- Latigo Smith. Now, you enjoy your food.

- I can't thank you enough.

Don't cry.

Money's the least of my troubles.

$100? Mister, you gave...

I ain't never even seen one.

I...

I ain't never even seen a...

If I hadn't been hurried, I could've

gotten him right between the eyes.

- You don't take after your sainted mother.

- I hate this town.

If I don't get back east to Miss Hunter's

College on the Hudson River, New York,

I am gonna hate it a whole lot more,

and everybody in it!

Well, you ain't exactly loved

by one and all around here.

- Enough, Oriville!

- Can't you do anything with her?

This is a family matter, Martha Perkins.

I'll thank you to stay out of it! Come along.

18, black and even. Everybody wins

again. Care to place a little bet, sir?

- You lookin' for trouble, mister?

- No, sir.

Do I look dim-witted enough

to play that game?

Against the house rules

to answer that kind of question, sir.

Howdy. Do you play pocket billiards?

- Not now. Are you Doc Schultz?

- Says so on my licence.

Toss me that piece of chalk.

Thank you.

Listen. If a man tells his lawyer

that he killed a gent or two,

the lawyer can't tell anybody?

I don't see how that concerns me,

but you're right.

The relationship is a sacred one.

The same with a doctor. A doctor

can't tell anybody what anybody's got.

You must have a very interesting disease.

- It's worth $500 to you.

- Getting more interesting by the minute.

Of course, I'll have to blow

your head off if you tell.

I ain't never seen leprosy.

If that's what you've got, I wouldn't know.

It ain't leprosy, but can't we go

someplace where we could be alone?

Well, that sounds like a sound idea.

My office is right up the street there.

Gonna change your mind about a bet, sir?

Have to be an idiot to play roulette.

Do I look like an idiot?

- No, sir.

- And don't you forget it.

Fire in the hole!

- What the hell was that?

- Third shift.

First and second set

the dynamite charges and fuse them.

Third does most of the blasting.

Sometimes this goes on all night.

Purgatory sits on the top of two mines.

Barton owns one, Colonel Ames the other.

Been fightin' each other trying to tunnel

to the mother lode for two years now.

- The mother lode?

- Centre of town, according to geologists.

Like buildin' a railroad

from east and west.

Whoever gets there first

gets to drive the golden spike.

- And the other one gets the shaft.

- Gets the shaft.

Yah!

She shoots at people, too.

Nicest girl in town.

I sure am curious

about that ailment of yours.

- This is your office?

- I doctor pack mules too.

Got a pain in the ass?

Come and see Doc Schultz.

This is better now. Well...

What's your problem?

Doc, you promise

you won't tell anybody, huh?

On my hypocritic oath.

- In all my born days!

- I was a little drunk at the time.

I could've guessed that.

Where's the young lady now?

Never mind. Can you take her off, Doc?

- You mentioned $500.

- Cash.

Well, if I ever knewed anything

about tattooin', I've forgotten it.

I'll have to read up on the subject.

You're gonna be around a few days?

Just long enough to get this thing off,

then I'll be long gone.

You ain't runnin' away from the lady?

No, of course not.

But if she should show up,

you haven't seen me, huh?

- How would I know her?

- She's got a lot of this gold-coloured hair.

She's got a lot of everything, but mostly

she's got a lot of this gold-coloured hair.

- What shall I do?

- Come back in a couple of days.

- That'll give me time to read up.

- Well, you're the... doctor.

Just a minute, I'd like to speak to you.

I don't know you, mister,

and I don't see any reason to start.

I want to offer you

very profitable employment.

I'm in business for myself.

Doc! Who is that fella?

None of your business. Speaking of which

all you mine-owners are a despicable lot.

You hire people to kill people that

other people hire to kill your people.

And you go elsewhere with your medical

business and I have to doctor jackasses.

Get outta here. I got business to attend to.

Anybody ever tell you

you've got a rotten bedside manner?

- Out!

- You talk too much. I can't understand.

Hey...

Like to place a bet, sir?

Sorry, sir, I didn't know it was...

Ask me that one more time,

I'll put a plate in your skull.

Yes, sir. I mean, no, sir.

- Sarsaparilla.

- What?

I would write it down but I don't figure

you could read it. Soda pop.

- Don't hardly anybody want soda pop.

- Don't you drink?

Only to be sociable.

And I don't feel sociable right now.

Dimwits.

- Who?

- Idiots playing roulette.

- Oh! Some people like it.

- Suckers. The worst kind of suckers.

The house gets the best of it.

No, they oughta take all the roulette

dealers out and string 'em up.

House got eight per cent the best of it,

even if the wheel is straight, and it ain't.

Eight per cent! That means that one out of

every 12 times you haven't got a chance.

Anybody who plays roulette oughta have

their head examined. Just lock 'em up.

They oughta burn all roulette wheels.

$4600 on number 23.

- Mister, I can't take that kinda money.

- 4600 on 23.

Boss!

Boss, this fella just bet $4600

on number 23.

Spin her.

Number 22. The man loses.

It just comes over me every so often.

Nothing I can do about it.

Number 23 just pulls at me.

Well...

- They say money isn't everything.

- Is if a man's hungry.

That reminds me. How much

you got left of that $100 I gave you?

- None.

- None?

I ate up $20 of it. I bought a girl some

wine. She had a sick mother in Salt Lake...

- You gave her the money?

- Seemed like the thing to do.

You idiot! That's the surest way

to make an enemy out of a woman.

- It is?

- I learned that a long time ago.

- You did?

- Well, let's take a walk.

I need the air and time to think.

- Young man, about that job...

- I told you not to bother me, mister.

- The man said something about a job.

- I don't like to work. It tires me out.

- How are we gonna eat if we don't work?

- We?

I figured we'd ride together.

- Ride? Horses?

- Yeah.

I told you, I don't ride. I'm a train man.

At least carriages.

A man has got to be numb on both ends

to earn his livin' sittin' on a horse.

- I just don't like horses.

- That's close to treason in these parts.

Lively place.

This is a two-shaft town.

Only one of them works full time.

- Half the jackass miners drink in places...

- A woman run that saloon?

- Hm?

- Does a woman run that saloon?

Miss Jenny.

You still got them spurs

you was trying to sell me? Give me them.

- You threw one away.

- I did just that.

- Open up another table.

- Yes, Miss Jenny.

- Miss Jenny?

- That's right.

I brought you this.

- From Slim.

- Is this a joke?

Ma'am, I rode over 300 miles

to bring you that spur.

It's hardly a jokin' matter,

a poor boy dyin'.

Just me and him out on the prairie all

alone, the wolves howlin' in the distance.

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