Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
I have sailed the world,
beheld its wonders
From the Dardanelles to
the mountains of Peru,
But there's no
place like London
No, there's no
place like London.
Mr. Todd-?
You are young.
Life has been kind to you.
You will learn.
There's a hole in the
world like a great black pit
And the vermin of
the world Inhabit it
And its morals aren't
worth what a pig could spit
And it goes by the name of London.
At the top of the hole
sit the privileged few
Making mock of the
vermin in the lower zoo,
turning beauty into filth and greed.
I too have sailed the world,
and seen its wonders
For the cruelty of men
is as wondrous as Peru,
but there's no
place like London!
Is everything all right, Mr. Todd?
I beg your indulgence, Anthony...
My mind is far from easy.
In these once familiar
streets I feel shadows
Shadows...?
Ghosts.
There was a barber and his wife,
and she was beautiful.
A foolish barber and his wife,
she was his reason and his life,
and she was beautiful,
and she was virtuous.
And he was... Naive.
There was another man who saw
that she was beautiful,
A pious vulture of the law,
who with a gesture of his claw
removed the barber from his plate.
Then there was nothing but to wait
and she would fall,
So soft,
So young,
So lost,
and oh, so beautiful!
And the lady, sir... did she succumb?
Oh, that was many years ago...
I'd like to thank you, Anthony.
If you hadn't spotted me,
I'd be lost on the ocean still...
Will I see you again?
You might find me, if you like,
around Fleet Street.
Until then, my friend.
There's a hole in the world
like a great black pit
and it's filled with people
who are filled with sh*t
And the vermin of
the world inhabit it...
A customer!
Wait! What's your rush?
What's your hurry?
You gave me such a- Fright.
I thought you was a ghost.
Half a minute, can't you? Sit!
Sit ye down!
Sit!
All I meant is that I haven't
seen a customer for weeks.
Did you come here for a pie, sir?
Do forgive me if me head's
a little vague- Ugh!
What is that? But you'd think
we had the plague-
From the way that people-
Keep avoiding-
No, you don't!
These are probably
the worst pies in London.
But there's no one comes in
even to inhale-
Right you are, sir.
Would you like a drop of ale?
Mind you, I can't hardly blame them-
These are probably
the worst pies in London.
I know why nobody cares to take them-
I should know, I make them.
But good? No,
the worst pies in London-
Even that's polite.
The worst pies in London-
If you doubt it, take a bite.
Is that just disgusting?
You have to concede it.
It's nothing but crusting-
Here, drink this, you'll need it-
The worst pies in London.
And no wonder with the price of meat.
What it is-
When you get it.
Never.
Thought I'd live to see the day
men'd think it was a treat
Finding poor
animals
wot are dying in the street.
Mrs. Mooney has a pie shop,
Does a business, but I noticed
something weird-
Lately all her neighbors' cats
have disappeared.
Have to hand it to her-
Wot I calls enterprise,
Popping pussies into pies.
Wouldn't do in my shop-
Just the thought of it's enough
to make you sick.
And I'm telling you
them p*ssy cats is quick.
No denying times is hard, sir -
Even harder than the worst pies in London.
Only lard and nothing more-
Is that just revolting?
All greasy and gritty,
it looks like it's molting,
And tastes like-
Well, pity
a woman alone
with limited wind
and the worst pies in London!
Ah sir, times is hard.
Times is hard.
Trust me, dearie, it's going to take
more than ale
to wash that taste out.
Come with me and we'll get
you a nice tumbler of gin.
Isn't this homey now?
Me cheery wallpaper was
a real bargain too,
it being only partly singed when the
chapel burnt down...
There's a good boy, now you sit down
and warm your bones,
Isn't that a room over the shop?
If times are so hard,
why don't you rent it out?
Up there?
Oh, no one will go near it...
People think it's haunted.
Haunted?
And who's to say they're wrong?...
You see, years ago,
something happened up there.
Something not very nice...
There was a barber and his wife,
and he was beautiful,
a proper artist with a knife,
but they transported him for life.
And he was beautiful...
Barker, his name was - Benjamin Barker.
Transported? What was his crime?
Foolishness.
He had this wife, you see,
pretty little thing,
silly little nit.
Had her chance for the moon on a string-
Poor thing. Poor thing.
There was this Judge, you see,
wanted her like mad.
Every day hed send her a flower,
but did she come down from her tower?
Sat up there and sobbed by the hour,
Poor fool.
Ah, but there was worse
yet to come, poor thing.
The Beadle calls on her, all polite,
poor thing, poor thing.
The Judge, he tells her,
is all controlled,
he blames himself for her dreadful plight
She must come straight
to his house tonight!
Poor thing, poor thing.
Of course, when she goes there,
poor thing, poor thing,
they're having this ball all in masks.
There's no one she knows there,
poor dear, poor thing.
She wanders tormented, and drinks,
poor thing.
The Judge has repented, she thinks,
poor thing.
She asks.
He was there, all right-
Only not so contrite!
She wasnt no match for such craft,
you see,
And everyone thought it so droll.
They figured she had to be daft,
you see,
So all of em stood there
and laughed, you see,
Poor soul!
Poor thing!
...NOOOOOO!
Would no one have mercy on her?
So it is you - Benjamin Barker.
Where's Lucy?!
Wheres my wife?!
She poisoned herself.
Arsenic from the
apothecary on the corner.
I tried to stop her but she
wouldn't listen to me.
And he's got your daughter.
He? Judge Turpin?
Adopted her like his own.
Fifteen years of sweating in a
living hell on a false charge.
Fifteen years dreaming that
I might come home
to find a loving wife and child...
Well, I can't say the years have been
particularly kind to you,
Mr. Barker, but you still-
No, not Barker. That man is dead.
It's Todd now. Sweeney Todd...
And he will have his revenge.
Come in! Nothing to
be afraid of, love.
When they came for the girl, I hid 'em.
I hid just some of 'em.
Those handles is chased
silver, ain't they?
Silver, yes...
These are my friends,
see how they glisten.
See this one shine,
how he smiles in the light.
My friend, my faithful friend.
Speak to me friend,
Whisper, I'll listen.
I know, I know-
You've been locked out of sight
all these years-
Like me, my friend.
Well, I've come home
To find you waiting.
Home,
and we're together,
and we'll do wonders,
won't we?
You there, my friend,
- I'm your friend too, Mr. Todd,
come, let me hold you.
- If you only knew, Mr. Todd.
Now, with a sigh
- Oh, Mr. Todd,
you're warm in my hand,
- My friend,
- You've come home.
- My clever friend.
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"Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 21 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/sweeney_todd:_the_demon_barber_of_fleet_street_19214>.
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