Sweet November Page #4

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No thanks.

NELSON:

Okay.

SARA:

See you tomorrow then.

Sara starts to get out, but Nelson stops her.

NELSON:

Whoa, whoa, whoa -- hold on.

SARA:

Is eight o'clock good? You, me,

Manny the doorman, that wholething?

31 INT. SARA'S LOFT - NIGHT 31

Deliberately chaotic, Sara's loft includes the fire polefrom the old station and plants galore. As the puppiescarouse in a pen, Sara sets two teacups on the kitchentable, where Nelson is sitting, aware of the fact thatshe is openly checking him out. He tries to strike a

nonchalant pose.

SARA:

I can help you, Nelson. I have a

gift. A special ability to helpmen with... problems.

Thinking this is a seduction tactic, he plays along.

NELSON:

I don't have problems.

SARA:

That's usually the first sign.

Nelson groans as she sits down across from him, deadserious.

Of what?

NELSON:

Denial.

much.

SARA:

I think you work too

Right.

work?

NELSON:

What do you know about

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SARA:

Plenty. You admitted you donothing else, and it doesn't makeyou happy. How's that for screwylogic?

NELSON:

I admitted nothing. I was silent.

SARA:

No special interests. No pets.

You hate dogs -

NELSON:

Busted! Actually, I do have a

pet. A fish. Oscar.

SARA:

Cold-blooded doesn't count.

You're a walking case study:

we've got anger, stress,

repression, extreme distraction,

egocentricity, and controlfreakism -

NELSON:

Control freakism is not a word -

SARA:

Look at you, you're a workaholicin such an advanced stage that allyour intimacy skills have witheredaway to almost nothing. Left

untreated, Nelson, you couldbecome emotionally extinct.

Nelson rolls his eyes and drinks his cocoa, checking outher messy loft with a wary look, thinking who is thisfreak?

NELSON:

Out of sheer, perverse curiosity,

how does a lunatic like you help aguy like me?

SARA:

You live in a box. I could openthe lid, let some light in.

NELSON:

Wow that's deep. I feel cured

already, just hearing about it.

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SARA:

(ignores him)

If you want my help, it'll requirea commitment on your part. You'll

have to live here with me for one

month, no more, no less, no work

allowed.

NELSON:

You don't even know me, and

you're inviting me to move inwith you?

Sara nods.

NELSON:

How's my girlfriend supposed tofeel about that?

SARA:

You don't have a girlfriend. I

mean, you can feel it... there'ssomething intimate a woman leaves

on a man. You don't have that.

NELSON:

Her name's Angelica.

SARA:

Well you know what? I feel sorryfor Angelica.

NELSON:

Great, I'll relay that to herwhen I leave. Which is rightabout now -

SARA:

October's almost over. We can

start midnight on the first ofNovember. If you're brave enoughto commit, I will devote myselfentirely to you.

Nelson gets up.

NELSON:

Brave enough, but not stupidenough.

(pause)

Now listen up, moonbeam. Here's

how it works. No more harassment,

no more rides, no more extortion.

(MORE)

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NELSON (CONT'D)

Next time you come to my building,

I really will call the cops.

Bye-bye.

He leaves. Frowning, Sara reflects on her failedproposal.

32 INT. JABE AND DUNNE - CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY 32

At the end of a long table, Raeford Dunne sits next toBUDDY LEACH (65). Vince and agency staff fill one sideof the table. Leach and the Doctor Diggety brassoccupy the other. Leach's face does not betray oneemotion as he listens to Nelson's presentation.

On the wall, white sheets of paper cover boards underneath.

Nelson is at the top of his game, a consummate showman. He

is so amped up, he's practically throwing off sparks. He

holds up a board with an image on it -- a silly looking50's style hot dog cartoon figure -- Doctor Diggety.

NELSON:

This is your brand image, Mister

Leach -- we polled your primary

demographic and you know what

eighty-nine percent said:

boring. Safe. We need to drop

a bomb.

(dropping the board)

We don't want hot dogs safe.

(working up a

head of steam)

What's in a hot dog? Don't tell

me! I don't wanna know...

He rips down a white sheet of paper to reveal an image ofa hot dog engulfed in flames: the hot dog from hell.

NELSON:

They're dangerous!

(pauses)

What are we selling here? We're

selling temptation -- desire -

animal instincts -- gluttony -

sin. We want to show man as he

really is... a savage... he needs

fire, he needs food. He hunts

and gathers, what does he get?

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Rips down another sheet of what looks like a cave mancooking hot dogs on a grill, his family of savageshuddled behind him.

NELSON:

He gets a hot dog!

(pauses)

We're pagans, we love our rituals-- our team hits the ball out of

the park, we're screaming, we'reinsane. What do we want?

Rips down another sheet of a crowd at baseball game pitchedforward screaming like monsters, all holding hot dogs.

NELSON:

We want a hot dog!

(pauses)

Let's go straight to your pre-teendemographic. Kids. The little

angels. They're not angels.

They're monsters. You give thema tuna sandwich. They don't wanta tuna sandwich...

(rips down another

sheet)

They want a hot dog!

Board showing a little boy glumly holding up a tunasandwich and an apple, lusting after the hot dog in thehands of a cute girl next to him. Nelson rushes over to

another sheet.

NELSON:

We need women. We've got themothers, we need their daughters.

Let's answer that age old question-- what does a woman really want?

You know. I know -

(rips sheet exposinganother board)

She wants a hot dog!

He is like some rabid animal, all fired up.

NELSON:

We're hot blooded -- we need sex.

We need a sinful, dangerous food.

What is it?

(rips another sheet)

It's a hot dog! It's a hot dog!

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He goes to the last sheet and rips it down. A pictureof a total babe in devil costume, all bright reds andcleavage, holding a pitchfork, a hot dog impaled on the

prong. The gates of hell sizzling overhead. The words:

"DOCTOR DIGGETY. IT'S A HOT DOG" at bottom. Nelson

pauses for dramatic effect.

NELSON:

Doctor Diggety. It's a hot dog.

There is a long pause as Nelson catches his breath andeveryone in the room turns to Leach to hear his reaction.

MR. LEACH

No.

NELSON:

(taken aback)

No. What do you mean?

MR. LEACH

It's not for us. You don't

understand our company.

NELSON:

I don't understand? What did youask for? Edge.

(points)

This is edge.

Not even willing to deal with Nelson, Leach turns toRaeford Dunne, as he prepares to leave.

MR. LEACH

We'll be going with Baker, Bohanen.

He gestures to his team, they rise, start to leave.

Nelson starts to snap.

NELSON:

Excuse me. I think you're makinga big mistake.

DUNNE:

Nelson -

Nelson grabs a sales chart, holds it up.

NELSON:

I've seen your sales. You're in

trouble.

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