Swing Away Page #4

maybe your daughter

would've infected you

both with golf-mania.

- I'm afraid I don't have

the Patience for such a game.

You have to be so quiet

and it takes all day to play.

- Yeah, my dad was the one

who played golf in my family.

He taught me and

my mom the game,

not just the rules and

how to swing the club,

but the philosophical

aspects, too,

what he called the

soul of the game.

- The soul of the game,

that's very poetic.

- Yup, that's my dad,

a true poet philosopher.

I miss him and my

mom every single day,

but I like to think

that the golf gods

wanted them to be together.

- The golf gods?

- Yeah.

My father decided that all

of the ancient Greek gods

now watch over golfers.

You know, since they don't have

anything better

to do these days.

It's kinda crazy, right?

- Yeah, but a good kinda crazy,

the crazy that

lightens the spirit.

I could have used that back

when I was an

attorney in Athens.

Oh my god, I was so serious,

and even though I was married,

it was as if I had nothing

else to do in my life but work.

- I know that feeling.

So, when did you make the

transition from lawyer to teacher?

- Well, Stella came

first into our lives,

so we wanted her to

grow up near family,

we move back to the village

and that's when

I started working

at Panayiotis' law

firm in rose town.

- Wait, Panayiotis

Manalakis, he was a lawyer?

- Yes, actually,

a very good one,

but then the crisis took many

things away from all of us,

so I start teaching

and I love it.

So, I'm right here.

I guess I'll see you again.

- Okay.

- Bye.

- Bye.

- I'm so sorry.

- Sorry.

- Good.

Make sure your

arms and shoulders

move as one like a pendulum.

Grab another.

Good.

- Yay, almost, very nice.

- Keep the putter between

the two lines, grab another.

- How she doing?

- We're getting there.

Good, just don't

break your wrists.

- Have you

ever hit a hole in one?

- Yes, many times,

but it's always a

surprise when it happens.

- Do you have a

favorite course to play on?

- Really, my favorite

course is always changing.

Right now, I'd say pebble beach,

but if you ask me again,

it might be some place else.

You're going to tire Zoe

with so many questions.

No, I don't mind, what else?

- Why did you go crazy?

That is not a nice thing to say!

- I'm so sorry.

- No, you know,

it's fine, I did go crazy

and I've been at

this game a long time

and when you work so hard

at something you

really care about,

the bad times can

get a bit dramatic.

- Okay.

- Okay.

My god, I'm so sorry.

- I hope for nothing,

I fear nothing,

I am free.

Are you okay?

- I'm not sure Henderson

is gonna be okay

with any of these changes.

- You are joking me?

This place is

virtually a palace now

compared to what it was.

People are no longer embarrassed

to be seen playing here.

Look at the reservation book.

- 90 rounds this week.

Six new annual memberships.

Plus 40 reservations

for next week.

How did this happen?

- Mostly the remodel and

I called in a few favors.

Oh, and I got you

a little writeup

in golf digest online, too.

- Oh, I could kiss you both.

- I'll pass on that.

- Hey, has anyone shown

up yet for the clinic?

- Well, no, of course not.

- The who does what?

- It's football.

- Zoe!

- Hey, everyone.

- Thomas, Thomas.

- I'll be at the bar.

- Just a reminder that we

still have the free clinic

going on at the

golf course right...

So, they lost, big deal.

- Football is a game we

care deeply about, Zoe.

- Okay, but golf should be, too.

- Name one good reason.

- Besides the fact

that it's a sport

you can actually play your

entire life unlike soccer.

- Football.

- Football, and on a

golf course right here

in your own village nonetheless,

I'll give you all the best

reason there is, it's Greek.

- Oh god, someone's

more pissed than me.

- Oh, no, no, no, hear me out.

Greeks invented

everything, right?

- Not everything.

- Most everything.

- Well, golf is one of

the things they invented.

- Well, as a subject of the UK,

I do feel compelled to point

out it was actually the Scots.

Well, a kilt looks an awful

lot like a fustanella to me.

- Yeah, actually, bagpipes

are mentioned in the odyssey.

- Yes.

And the name Scotland

comes from the Greek "Skotia"

which is the Greek word

for the land of darkness.

Their patron Saint

is our San Andreas

and his cross

appears on their flag

which happens to have the

same colors as our flag.

- I think that's

stretching it a little bit.

- And if you go back even

further before Scotland existed,

you've got the development of

geometry, philosophy, physics,

all concepts rooted

in ancient Greece,

all essential to

the game of golf,

and then there's the

influence of the Greek gods.

I mean, you have Hephaestus

who forges our mighty clubs

and Athena who gives us the

wisdom to choose our shots

and Apollo who guides our aim.

- Dionysus who inspired

this brilliantly insane

conversation, allow me, Zoe.

- Please.

- Poseidon who tests

and tortures us

with his hazardous water.

- Ares who gives us energy.

- Yes, Pappous.

- You're aware we no longer

believe in these gods?

- Not literally, maybe,

but they're still a part

of the Greek psyche.

- Then why don't the

Greeks play golf?

- I don't know.

I mean,

maybe we get so

caught up in our past,

sometimes we forget to

appreciate the present,

but in golf,

the present is all that matters.

Nothing else exists.

No failures.

No disappointments.

It's just you and

the ball, the green,

everything else falls off.

Anyway, do you

really want the Scots

to take all the credit

for this glorious game

when everything it represents

is key to the Greek

mind and soul?

No.

What about Henderson?

I mean, he might own colossus,

but he doesn't own golf, right?

No!

Right, so make the game yours.

I want you to go out

there, hit some balls,

and rediscover your roots.

- Yes.

- Here are the purchase

orders you asked for.

Oh, and I'm taking these,

so just take 'em out

of my commission.

- Do you want tsipouro?

It's good for hangover.

- God, no, I'm never

touching that stuff again.

- Okay, but I'm telling you,

dog's hair is the only cure.

- Well, I rather

suffer, it'll pass.

- Some suffering does not pass.

The Henderson kind of suffering,

working for this man

is worse than any hangover.

- Then why do you do it?

- Money.

If I could make the

course profitable,

I could be an equal partner.

- Well then, why

are you so upset?

You have more customers now

than you've probably ever had.

- Everybody hates me,

the whole village, I have no one.

The only girl I ever loved

married somebody else,

my parents are long gone,

my brother is abroad,

and last year, my dog, she left,

I have no one except Henderson,

this greedy snake, a lying pig.

- Panayiotis, you either

had too much of that stuff

or not nearly enough.

- Wow.

Great shot, Agapi.

- Hey.

- Hey.

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