Swingers Page #14

ROB:

... Four days..?

SUE:

... I don't know about four days...

CHARLES:

... That's what I heard...

MIKE:

... Maybe. I mean you gotta hide all the

lights...

TRENT:

... It looked money.

SUE:

... Not as money as the shot from

Reservoir Dogs...

ROB:

... Which one?

SUE:

... In the beginning. When they're

walking in slow motion...

MIKE:

... How can you compare them? Tarantino

totally bites everything from Scorsese...

SUE:

... He's derivative...

TRENT:

... You gotta admit, it looked money...

CHARLES:

.... I heard they made that whole movie

for ten grand...

ROB:

... What's the big deal? Everyone steals

from everyone.

MIKE:

(checking his watch)

Well, let's hit that party.

CUT TO:

36 EXT. SUNSET BOULEVARD - HEADLIGHTS AND NEON - NIGHT 36

The five swingers walk down the boulevard in a SLO-MO SHOT

which is extremely "derivative" of the "Reservoir Dogs"

credit sequence.

The scene is choreographed to Bennett's big band arrangement

of "O SOLE MIO".

CUT TO:

37 EXT. CHATEAU MARMONT BUNGALOW - OUTSIDE THE PARTY - MIDNIGHT 37

Muffled music seeps through the door. The swingers turn the

knob and enter...

38 INT. THE PARTY - CHATEAU MARMONT BUNGALOW - SAME 38

The huge sunken living room is packed with people congealed

into circles of conversation and sipping cocktails.

EVERYTHING STOPS when they enter. The music, the

conversations, all movement, everything.

Everyone in the room STARES at them standing in the doorway.

Beat.

The music starts back up and everyone returns to their

conversations.

The swingers weave their way through the crowd to...

39 INT. THE BAR AREA - THE BUNGALOW KITCHEN - SAME 39

The swingers fix themselves drinks from an assortment of

bottles cluttering the table. The shamelessly paw at the

top shelf brands.

MIKE:

Who threw this party, anyway?

SUE:

Damned if I know...

TRENT:

... Beats me...

CHARLES:

... I came with you.

With that, the three of them peel off to work the room.

ROB:

What's that guy's name? Sue?

MIKE:

Sue. His dad was big Johnny Cash fan.

ROB:

Oh, like that song...

MIKE:

... "A Boy Named Sue". I think that's

why he's such a bad cat.

ROB:

Him?

MIKE:

He's a mean dude. I've seen him smash a

guy's face into the curb. He knocked out

his teeth... blood... He was just like

Boom, Boom, Boom... f***in nasty sh*t,

man. He's a nice guy though.

CUT TO:

40 INT. LIVING ROOM - BUNGALOW - SAME 40

Trent and Sue are scouting some LADIES across the room. One

wears a FUNKY OVERSIZED HAT. Intermittent eye contact has

been established.

TRENT:

Oh, it's on, baby...

SUE:

... It's on.

BACK TO:

41 INT. LIVING ROOM - BUNGALOW - SAME 41

Mike and Rob have come back into the room. They scout the

terrain.

MIKE:

There are so many beautiful women here.

ROB:

It's unbelievable.

MIKE:

I got to at least try once.

ROB:

You're a better man than I am, Charlie

Brown.

MIKE:

No, I just promised myself I'd give it a

try. I gotta get out there sooner or

later.

ROB:

Go for it, man.

Mike spots a pair of beautiful BLONDES in black. They're

wearing stretch bell-bottoms and tops that expose their mid-

drifts. The seventies never looked so good.

MIKE:

(indicating the ladies)

I'm going in. Will you be my wing-man?

ROB:

I'll be your winger.

They make the approach. With a great deal of effort, Mike

catches their attention...

MIKE:

Good evening, ladies...

... only to be interrupted by the party STOPPING to check

another entrance.

Beat.

The party RESUMES and the blondes redirect their attention to

Mike. He is a little put-off but, God love him, he gets back

in there.

MIKE:

How are you ladies doing this evening?

BLONDE:

What do you drive?

MIKE:

I'm sorry?

BLONDE:

What kind of car do you drive?

MIKE:

Oh... a Cavalier.

The blondes immediately enter back into their conversation as

if they were never approached.

Mike and Rob exchange defeated glances.

One more try.

MIKE:

... It's red?

CUT TO:

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