Swingers Page #6

MIKE:

Sorry. We got knocked out pretty

quickly.

CHRISTY:

(sarcasm?)

A couple of high rollers like you?

MIKE:

Could you believe it?

CHRISTY:

Wait here, I'll get you that martini.

MIKE:

Nah, I didn't really want it anyway. I

just wanted to order it.

CHRISTY:

Can I get you something else? I mean,

you shouldn't leave without getting

something for free.

MIKE:

No thanks. Why ruin a perfect night.

TRENT:

(condescending)

Bring a James Bond for me and my boy

Mikey, and if you tell the bartender to

go easy on the water...

(holds up a half-dollar)

...this Kennedy has your name on it. Now

run along, I'm timing you.

The waitress smiles in spite of herself, shakes her head, and

walks away.

MIKE:

What an a**hole.

TRENT:

That was money. Tell me that wasn't

money.

MIKE:

That was so demeaning...

TRENT:

She smiled, baby.

MIKE:

I can't believe what an a**hole you are.

TRENT:

Did she, or did she not smile.

MIKE:

She was smiling at what an a**hole you

are.

TRENT:

She was smiling at how money I am, baby.

MIKE:

Let's go. I'm not paying for a room, and

if we don't leave now we'll never make

it.

TRENT:

Leave? The honey-baby's bringing us some

cocktails.

MIKE:

What are you, nuts? You think she's

coming back?

TRENT:

I know she's coming back.

MIKE:

I don't think so.

TRENT:

Baby, did you hear her? "You shouldn't

leave without getting something for

free." She wants to party, baby.

MIKE:

You think so?

TRENT:

You gotta give Tee one thing. He's good

with the ladies.

MIKE:

I'm too tired for this. Let's just go.

TRENT:

Baby, this is what we came for. We met

a beautiful baby and she likes you.

MIKE:

She likes you.

TRENT:

Whatever. We'll see. Daddy's gonna get

her to bring a friend. We'll both get

one. I don't care if I'm with her or one

of her beautiful baby friends.

MIKE:

I don't know...

TRENT:

You gotta get that girl out of your head.

It's time to move on. You're a stylish,

successful, good looking cat. The ladies

want to love you, you just gotta let

them.

MIKE:

That's bullshit.

TRENT:

It's not. You're money. Any of these

ladies would be lucky to pull a cat like

you.

MIKE:

It's just that I've been out of the game

so long. Trent, I was with her for six

years. That's before AIDS. I'm scared.

I don't know how to talk to them, I don't

know...

TRENT:

You can't think like that, baby. It's

hard, I know. I've been there. Not for

six years, but I know. You just gotta

get back out there.

MIKE:

It's just tough, after sleeping with

someone you love for so long, to be with

someone new... who doesn't know what I

like... and you gotta wear a jimmy...

TRENT:

... gotta...

MIKE:

... and then I'm struggling to impress

some chick who's not half as classy as my

girlfriend, who I'm not even really

attracted to...

TRENT:

Oh f*** that. You don't have to try and

impress anyone. You think I give a sh*t?

You think I sweat that skanky whore

waitress...

Tee is interrupted by the WAITRESS who, thank God, barely

missed his comment.

TRENT:

(recovering, looking at watch)

... One fifty-nine, Two minutes.

WAITRESS:

Two vodka martinis, straight up, shaken

not stirred, very dry, easy on the water.

TRENT:

Beautiful. What time are you off...

(reads nameplate)

... Christy?

WAITRESS:

Six.

Mike can't believe it. Tee is just making it happen.

TRENT:

Call a friend and have her meet the three

of us at the Landlubber Lounge at 6:01.

(Trent throws the half-dollar

on her tray)

SMASH CUT TO:

15 INT. TREASURE ISLAND CASINO - COFFEE SHOP - SAME NIGHT 15

Trent and Mike are looking at menus. They're smoking at the

table because the can.

MIKE:

That was so f***in' money. It was like

that "Jedi mind" sh*t.

TRENT:

That's what I'm telling you, baby. The

babies love that stuff. They don't want

all that sensitive sh*t. You start

talking to them about puppy dogs and ice

cream. They know what you want. What do

you think? You think they don't?

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