Teacher of the Year

---

Moop, moop, moop.

Moop, moop, moop.

Moop, moop, moop.

Moop, moop, moop.

The skinniest schmoop in

the chicken coop goes...

...Scoop, scoop, scoop.

Scoop, scoop, scoop.

'Cause he's getting...

...all that food, right?

Scooping it all up.

a charter school in southwestern.

Los Angeles, California.

Mitch Carter is head of

Truman's English department,

and was recently named

California Teacher...

...of the Year.

He is now a nominee

for the national award.

Love my job. Not every day of course.

But, uh, it's a good life.

Ronald Douche is the school's principal.

Start now? Okay.

Um, welcome.

Truman is, uh, a newer

high school, opened in 2007.

Our first senior class just

graduated this last spring.

We serve, uh,

over 1,000 students,

most of them from right here in good old...

...southwestern Los Angeles.

Some kids back there.

Hey, guys.

Terrific.

We are fortunate

enough to have some of the...

...latest technology available.

Beautiful chemistry labs.

They did such a nice

job on the installation.

Two well-stocked computer labs

training on many programs.

Great start, great foundation, great base.

We'll have a giant hammer

come up here with a claw.

And of course,

our nationally ranked...

...robotics team.

Gonna shoot something out.

Oh, this is a great start.

In 1999, I was writing

for Mattel toys for their.

Barbie doll website.

'Barbie for president.'

I was, uh... I was supposed

to be writing Barbie's...

...election platform.

Um, you know,

more swimming pools.

No brown shoes with black pants.

Six months later,

I was a teacher.

This is a tough part of town.

The kids know it's not gonna be easy.

We're giving them hope.

Throwing them a rope.

The kids are appreciative of that.

You know, of what we do here for them.

For the community.

It's, uh... Wow, I'm getting

a little filled up here.

But, uh,

I take a lot of pride in that.

You know what?

It's pronounced...

'Dow-shay,' not Douche.

Dow-shay.

It is the same spelling

but the Dutch pronunciation.

That is it, young man.

That is it. I see you.

That is detention.

Detention for...

...the entire year.

Put the cameras away.

Put them away. Put them away.

Turn off those...

Okay, you know what?

As soon as I'm done here,

that is it for you.

Confiscated. Both of you.

Phones are going to be gone.

It's pronounced 'Dow-shay.'

Okay,

let's get settled in.

This is not a bad dream. It is Monday.

You are back in class.

I want you to take out your

journals and take a look...

...at the topic on the board.

I want you guys to write about...

...something that you like.

But you hide it from your friends...

...because you are afraid

of what they will think.

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

I'll go first. Um...

... When I was in high school,

I really loved the ballet.

My mother used to take

me to see The Nutcracker...

...every Christmas.

But I was afraid that my friends would...

...make fun of me,

so I told them that she was

taking me to a Laker game.

All right, you guys are

up now, you got 15 minutes.

I like to start class with a writing exercise.

It gets their brains in the right place.

Especially on a Monday.

Okay, let's share our responses.

Oh, come on, I told

you about the ballet.

It's all downhill from there.

Zola.

Sometimes when I'm

depressed, the only thing...

...that makes me feel better...

...is listening to Dora the

Explorer song on my iPod.

Marcus.

Uh, um, one time when I was

visiting my grandparents,

I woke up in the middle of the night...

...to take some Advil,

but it was my grandpa's Viagra.

You were supposed

to write about something...

...that you liked.

Did you like that?

Are you going to be talking

to the other teachers, too?

Um...

... I just...

I think it's important.

And this is why.

I mean, yeah, I'm, uh,

'Teacher of the Year.'

That's... And which is

great, and I love it.

I love that you guys are

here doing this movie.

I think it's important.

I hope we can show something...

... about public schools

and what's happening here.

But, uh, the award itself,

is really the byproduct

of all of our work together...

...here at this school.

Yes, I won it,

but, um, you know...

I don't do this by myself,

I guess is all I'm saying.

Right.

These kids don't get better just because.

I show up and do my thing.

I'm not laughing.

I'm being serious here.

You come on.

We are the Hammers. Uh,

though we're not married.

No, we are not.

My name is Clive Hammer.

I am Lowell Hammer.

And we are guidance counselors.

Well, we're college counselors.

But we guide you to college.

So we're kind of like...

...Religious leaders.

Shamans.

I think it's shayman.

Well, shayman suggests...

...that we shame them.

Which we're not afraid to do.

Which we will use shame.

So...

... We will answer questions.

We've got experience.

We speak from the hip.

We throw it from the kneecap.

We toss it.

Which is even...

...lower than the hip.

Yeah, well, some guys,

some guys will...

...talk from the hip.

We take it from the kneecap.

We like to throw it...

...from below the hip.

We just toss it out to you.

Which is even a...

...straighter shot.

Yeah, it's a straight shot,

straight into your mouth.

Think about it like this.

If college were hell...

... And it is, guys.

For a while, it's hell.

Best time of your life,

best years of your life,

but it's hell.

But it's hellish.

It's like a burning inferno of hell and hatred.

It's terrible.

Think of us as like a two-headed dog.

Mmm-hmm.

And we're sitting on that

River Styx in a boat...

...Right, and we gotta take you across.

You can't swim to the River Styx.

No, you can't.

You can't do that.

I'd like to...

...see you try it.

I wish you could try.

I dare you.

You're going to burn your legs off.

But you get with us...

You're in the boat.

We take you across.

We guide you to...

...where you need to go.

We get you to hell.

Yeah.

I think the secret is,

we know everything,

assume that they know nothing.

You have to start from that point and then...

...work your way backwards.

Or forward.

Forward.

Or laterally.

Yeah.

You asked when the applications are...

...due for UCLA.

Those were due yesterday.

Yesterday.

Yesterday.

So, that is, uh...

Ouch.

A no-can...

That's a no-fly zone.

That's not good.

Yeah, so, uh, forget about

that one. USC tomorrow.

Exactly, so, six essays,

you knock 'em out tonight.

You're good to go.

5-Hour Energy.

Pop one of those in your mouth, boom,

boom, boom. You're gold.

Get a get a couple of Coke Zeros and...

None of those calories.

But you are still learning and you...

...are still staying awake.

Can she...

... Can she do that?

You just hop out...

...of here right now...

...and just start on that process?

She can't?

She can't.

Okay.

Look, you...

...cram it tonight.

Tonight. You'll get in there tonight.

The problem is that teaching...

...is tougher today.

Because they put hormones in the milk,

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes