The Bates Haunting
- NOT RATED
- Year:
- 2012
- 76 min
- 24 Views
What's up?
This is Bam Margera.
You wanna see
something scary?
You wanna see something
really scary?
Check out The Bates Motel
and Haunted Hayride.
- Oh, Jesus!
- Gotcha.
Oh my God,
you scared me!
Hey!
Not with your makeup on.
You kiss me with
your makeup on all the time.
Yeah, that's different.
Some broad got herself
fired earlier.
Maybe I can get you her job.
Working here's a scream.
This place is packed.
I had no idea there were
so many freaks in Gradyville.
Lily!
Hi.
I um, got you an early birthday
present for your big debut.
Oh, this is so pretty,
thank you.
long life and good luck.
It's bad luck to say, "good
luck" on opening night.
Listen, I gotta get going,
but be sure to get in line soon
so you can be the first to
catch my big performance.
Easy!
Ladies and gentlemen!
Prepare to bear witness to
the virgin sacrifice!
Ahh!
Consume her!
No!
Lily!
Help!
Someone do something!
Please, someone help her!
Can't you do something?!
Hello!
Been waiting 40 minutes
for my pizza!
I'd rather be on fire than be
in your stupid restaurant!
42 minutes for my pizza!
Jesus!
Hello.
Hello!
Been waiting 40 minutes
for my pizza!
40 minutes for my pizza!
You seem aggravated, too.
This is ridiculous.
I'm so hungry, I could have
Danny DeVito fart in my mouth
to fill me up.
Someone please help me!
Yeah, finally.
Ah!
God dammit!
Oh, I am so sorry, sir!
Oh my god!
Are you serious with that?!
Looks like a
sh*t-covered Frisbee!
Those pepperonis look like
Samoan nipples!
I emphatically apologize, sir!
No charge!
You just gave me
a big pile of sh*t!
- No, no, no, sir!
- It's ridiculous!
You call yourself a cook?!
I will make... a new one for
you!
Next Tuesday, maybe?
Yeah, I'll be ready for it.
Thank you for coming to
Goose King Pizzeria!
Just sit, sir!
Where the hell is Agnes?!
That's two in a row.
I think you're
in the wrong business.
Clyde, don't start.
What?
Too much planning.
Glock, Glock, motherf***er!
Aw, balls!
Dude, this gun is sketch.
You should definitely
stick to writing.
Yeah, too bad no one will
pay me to write.
I think that's why Hannah
left me.
Well... maybe you can write
coloring books,
so she can read them.
Might as well.
Nothing ever happens in
Gradyville worth writing about.
Well, you can't let
your environment
dictate your behavior.
Gotta man-up and
do what you're good at.
Oh, you're one to talk.
You haven't dated anyone or even
held a job since Lily died.
Seriously, Clyde?!
I'm sorry, I'm just saying,
you know...
What are you saying?!
Well, you need to recover a
little bit...
- Recover?
- Agnes?!
Ah, horse tits!
What?!
Whoo!
Why don't you
light that motherf***er?
Good to be fired.
- Whatever.
- I feel liberated, actually.
You're too good for that place,
anyway.
Ah, wait for that.
All day long.
Uh, Clyde?
What?
Look behind us.
Oh sh*t!
- Put it out, put it out!
- F***, f***, f***, f***!
Get some f***ing perfume or
f***ing something, something!
- Oh, sh*t, sh*t, sh*t!
- Oh sh*t!
Sh*t, sh*t.
Ah! Ah!
This always happens
when you drive my car!
Dad.
Please get out of the vehicle.
Come on!
Why aren't you at
Goose King Pizza?
Did you lose your job?
Sorry if I'm not gonna be
the regional manager
of some lame-ass pizzeria
for the rest of my life.
Dammit, Agnes!
That was the last place
in Gradyville
where you could work!
If you were anyone else,
you'd be in handcuffs
right now!
Clear your head!
Take Clyde home!
When I get off work...
we are gonna discuss
this further.
Bye, Mr. R!
Shut up, Clyde!
That was close.
Agnes?
Shouldn't you be in bed
by now?
We need to have
a family discussion.
I think it's time we try
something different.
What are you talking about?
- I spoke with the Bates today.
- What?!
Hayride opens this weekend.
Despite your track record
around town,
they've agreed to
give you a job.
As a favor to me.
That's crazy!
"exposure therapy."
Perhaps by being in
direct contact with the thing
you're most afraid of...
I'm not afraid of that place!
I don't have
nightmares anymore.
Honey... I hear you cry
in your room at night.
And I'm pretty sure it's not
because of the lady-cramps.
Ew, Dad!
Really?!
You wanna try to talk to me
about my period?!
Agnes...
I've been thinking about
this...
the Bates pay you.
It'll help you get back
on your feet.
Am I the only one
that cares about Lily's death?
Of course not!
It's just that...
You're the only one
that hasn't moved on.
I'm not working at
the Bates Motel.
Well, since you dropped
outta school...
you don't have very many
options here.
Agnes.
Come find me.
Lily?
Lily, where are you?
Lily?!
Lily?
Lily?!
Agnes.
Lily?!
Agnes.
Lily?!
Help me.
Where are you?
Come find me, Agnes.
Agnes.
- Hi Delores!
- Good day, officer, Rickover!
This must be Agnes.
She's a little spooked
about being here.
She's uh...
thinks the place is haunted.
Aw, it is haunted!
We take that as
a compliment around here.
I'm Andrew.
This is my boy, Junior.
your uh... father says that
you'll make a good employee.
Where are your shoes?
No, I like to...
stay connected to the farm.
should know about?
Okay, Agnes.
Lily Hansen
was her best friend.
Oh Agnes, I'm sorry.
I assure you, what happened
was an accident.
And safety regulations have
improved all over the farm.
The operator of that machine
was put behind bars.
We're really not as scary
as our name is.
Yeah, I'm uh...
pretty far from Norman Bates.
Could even call me uh...
Normal Bates?
How's that going for you?
Why don't you let Junior here
show you around the farm?
Junior's time to shine.
We're real proud of him
around here.
I'll pick you up after
your shift is over.
Hey we'll see you around,
hey Dan?
Sure thing, Andrew.
Junior,
thanks again for this.
- Sure.
- Our pleasure.
All right, Agnes, let's uh...
show you around.
Right here is where
It's where I got my start.
Poppa made me work
my way up to manager.
Look, Junior, no offense,
but the less of this place
I have to deal with, the
better.
I'd like it if you just
showed me what I have to do.
You're gonna work here,
you're gonna have to answer
questions customers may have
about the farm.
You know, we're not really
a motel.
But every once in awhile,
someone will call and
make a reservation.
This is the uh...
prop and costume shed.
Basically, where the a...
Guys, come on!
- Oh god...
- Ben?
Agnes!
What did I tell you two about
the S-E-X stuff?!
I mean, look, we're sorry!
Okay, and...
What the hell is she
doing here?!
- She works here now!
- Great!
Glad to see that
you've moved on, Ben.
And Hannah...
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"The Bates Haunting" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 21 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_bates_haunting_19728>.
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