The Best Man Holiday Page #7

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No!

No one gets to see this!

Goddamn onions.

Sh*t.

You just need to get some rest,

and I will wake you when the

rest of the fam gets here, okay?

Okay. Thank you.

Get some sleep.

Okay.

Come on, y'all.

I'm fine.

It's cool. I'm good.

No, Murch.

I appreciate you all.

Love you, man.

We got you.

"In a world beyond the skies,

children live a wonderful existence

"before choosing their parents.

"That's right. Children

choose their parents.

"But these aren't

ordinary children.

"They're Zodiacs.

"Archer was a fearless Zodiac

"who spied a couple in Harlem

who for so long wanted a baby.

"But no Zodiac had

ever chosen them.

"But why? They seemed

like good people. "

Damn.

You're ruining my

good-girl image.

I won't tell if you don't.

Puff.

Pass.

Dja vu, huh?

Your mom.

I was 13.

And my daddy.

He just kept working, you know.

That's what he does.

"Got to make the money,

got to make the money,

"got to make the money. "

It's funny. She just...

She was so strong like you.

And she never let anybody know

that she was sick, you know.

One day she was

there, and then...

Hey.

Who's going to be

around for you, Q?

Somebody.

I don't know.

I'm alone, but I ain't...

Trust me, I ain't lonely.

I appreciate you, brother.

And I love you, sis.

Amen.

Hey.

Hey.

You Okay?

Not really.

You talk to Candace?

Text.

I hate texts.

How's Kennedy?

Is she okay?

Despite how bad a mother I am?

Yes.

I didn't say that.

I did.

I don't have one

maternal bone in my body.

All I do is criticize

her because she's not me.

Who the hell am I?

That is such a loaded question.

Thanks for the

compassion, honey.

I'm not your honey.

I'm not here for you

like that anymore, Shelby.

I'm sorry.

This night

couldn't get any worse.

That medicinal weed is no joke.

Ugh! I was wrong.

It's dark.

WOW.

You like it?

Yeah.

How did you do this?

Once I understood what was

really going on with your book,

I wanted to inspire you.

Actually one of Brian's colleagues

put the mock-up together.

B-Mac.

What could have been, huh?

Mmm.

Do me a favor and

after you send me a copy,

just make sure you delete that.

Because I don't want it to

be taken out of context.

Well, you can

delete it yourself.

Merry Christmas.

For real?

Yeah. It's about time you caught

up with the rest of the world.

I don't know. There's something

about pen and paper.

It's just...

When I'm finished,

I know it's real.

I can touch it.

Mmm. I get that.

It's like your baby.

Yeah.

Yeah. That used to be one

of my favorite metaphors.

Mmm.

I'm sorry, hon.

You're fine. You're fine.

Don't worry about it.

You must be hyped to

get to Hawaii, huh?

I don't know.

Kind of doesn't feel like

I should be going anywhere.

Oh, right.

I don't think I

can leave until...

Hey, hey.

I'm losing my best friend.

I know.

And she tries, you know.

She calls, she emails.

And I'm just, Jordan's

always just too damn busy.

You didn't know.

I should have known.

Now, I just feel like I'm just too late.

You know, I just feel like...

Now I just feel like

I'm too late and what...

It's okay.

It's okay.

You are here now.

So is she.

As long as she's still here,

you're right on time.

I love you, Harper.

Love you, too.

I love you, too.

Wait, Robyn. This is...

Oh, no. Sh*t. Robyn?

Robyn, please,

it's not what you...

I know Mia's sick!

Robyn, be careful.

Robyn.

Leave me alone.

Listen to me.

I swear. Robyn?

I swear, Robyn.

What?

What could you possibly swear?

That I didn't see what I thought?

That it's complicated?

Well, yeah, kind of...

Am I making too much noise?

No, no, man.

You're good. Yeah.

Okay.

It was third and

long in Dallas.

Cowboy Nation was in a frenzy.

I was nervous, excited.

Iso lead was the play.

Took it right up the gut. Pow.

Knocked the snot out of me.

But not before I moved those chains.

First down.

Cowboy Nation just fell silent.

You're a bad man.

Yeah, it felt good, man.

It felt good.

I knew I belonged then.

You couldn't stop me

from bragging, boy.

Then you came up that week after that.

Remember?

Yeah, with Murch.

That's a weekend

I will never forget.

On the bus we came up.

Yeah, man.

But we had good times.

Once you guys got there

we had a good time.

Yeah, we did.

And Quentin was crying about...

Because somebody threw up

in his brand-new...

Yeah, it was Murch.

Murch threw up.

Q was mixing his drinks.

He paid for that.

Do you mind taking this

turkey over there?

You want this one or this one?

That one is good.

You sure that's not

too heavy for you?

I can handle it.

I can handle it.

Merry Christmas.

Here you go.

Ho-ho-ho!

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!

Oh!

Is he drunk?

- Everybody having a good time here?

- Very good.

Lemon or red velvet?

Red velvet.

Okay. There you go.

That's a special

lady you got there.

Yeah, yeah, I know.

Why don't you stop

staring so hard, brah?

Look like that thirsty-ass

freshman you were

before I had to

raise your game up.

Oh, come on.

I was not that bad.

Hi.

It's all going so well.

I remember you

gave me a crib sheet.

Looks like old

times over there.

Thanks, Uncle Quentin.

- Can I leave now?

- Good night, LJ.

Get out of this doggone suit.

Don't take it off yet. Kennedy

likes light-skinned Santa.

So does her momma.

Good night, Quentin.

You know you wanna sit on Santa's lap.

Shut up.

L. Can I get

a ride with you, man?

I got you, man. I'm hitting

the bathroom first.

Hey, babe.

Hey.

I'm gonna go warm up the car. All right?

Okay.

Julian?

Murch-Murch.

Julian, would you mind giving

me a ride back to the house?

Sure.

Thanks. I'll be in the car.

I'm floored. I'm amazed.

You know what they say,

"The Lord works... "

"In mysterious ways. "

"God, Family, Football"?

What the hell is this?

Oh, no.

Uh...

God. Lance, this isn't

what it looks like.

I invited you to my house!

I let you back in.

I let you back in and...

Wait a minute, Lance.

Now. At this time.

No. You wait a minute.

Look at this.

Don't read that. "First pro

yards, guiding principles... "

Trying to get at my kids!

Lance!

All that bullshit, babe.

Just go to the car.

You let me handle this.

You hear me?

I got this.

Mia... Don't you say a

motherfucking thing to her.

You ain't nothing but a

goddamn snake in the grass.

That's what you are.

You stay away from me.

You stay away from my family!

Forever this time.

You hear me? Forever!

Come on.

Calm down.

Just... Let's go.

Listen.

I can't believe I...

Lance, talk to me.

Little sneaky snake.

No, no. I'm done talking.

Just get in the car.

What did you do now?

Can you put that in the car?

And you think it'll

fit with the luggage?

Yeah. Perfect.

Yeah? Okay.

Daddy!

What the!

Hello!

Oh, my gosh!

I missed you so much!

Look at you.

- How was Grandma's? Was it fun?

- Yes.

Hey, girls, you want

some hot chocolate?

Yes!

Mommy, can we?

Please, please, please!

Just for a little while.

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