The Bigfoot Project Page #2

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- Let's go!

- Thanks, man.

Yeah, my cousin cut it. He can

edit your movie. He's pretty good.

Yeah? Is he really any

good, or does he...?

Hi, I'm here

with Michael Joneses.

Am I saying that correctly?

- Joneses.

- Okay.

- Mr. Joneses.

- Yes, sir.

You reported seeing Bigfoot

almost two weeks ago,

is that correct?

Yes, sir.

And you're sure it was Bigfoot?

Yes, sir.

That is very exciting.

Where exactly did you see him?

Over there somewheres.

Over there somewheres?

Yes, sir.

Okay, um, and...

And what did he look like?

Big.

- He looked big.

- Yes, sir.

Just big?

Yes, sir.

Shh.

Uh, were there any other details

about the sighting?

- No, sir. -I was really

expecting a "yes, sir" there.

Uh, were you with

any one at the time?

Yes, sir.

- Okay, great. Who?

- Willie ray.

- Willie ray.

- Yes, sir.

- And where does he live?

- Over there somewheres.

Yes, sir?

- What the hell was that? -That

was a very bad interview, Steve.

Oh, that was a very bad

interview? Oh, thanks moose.

Are they all gonna

be like that, Steve?

I don't know.

I hope not.

The interviews

are not gonna cut it.

- Mm-mmm.

- Guys, I have an idea.

- No.

- Yes.

What if we actually

looked for Bigfoot.

- I'm in 100%.

- Steve.

Guys, hear me out, okay?

As of right now, what are we doing?

What are we doing?

We're making a movie

with interviews.

- Okay, that's boring.

- Snoozefest.

- Why can't we look for him?

- Because he doesn't exist.

Well, it doesn't

hurt to try, right?

I say we camp out

for a few weeks

- and really investigate.

- No way, man.

I would rather watch

every Tyler Perry movie.

Steve, I gotta work next week.

You know that.

- Ooh, where do you work?

- Yeah, where do you work?

Why?

I don't know, I just think

maybe I could come in,

- like, hey, Jamie, what's happening?

You'd be like,

"you are a stud." I'd be like,

"stop, you're embarrassing me,

but I secretly

want you to keep going."

- I need a job.

- Mm-hmm, okay.

No, let's just head back

into town and then...

What?

- Oh, Jesus!

- Deliverance!

Roll your window down.

- Uh, no, thanks!

- No, thank you.

- You guys the Bigfoot people, right?

- -Nope.

- We're not?

- No. Tell him...

- Say no.

- Say no.

- I stepped in sh*t.

- He stepped in sh*t.

Oh, god.

Okay, I am here with Earl,

and Earl is claiming

to have seen Bigfoot.

- Is that correct? -That's right,

but he won't let anybody see him.

- What do you mean? -Well, you

see, the thing with Bigfoot is,

if he wants to be seen,

then you can see him,

but if he don't,

then you ain't gonna see him.

That's just...

That's just the way it is.

- It's just like that. -But he

is somewhere in these woods?

Oh, no, yeah, no,

he's around here.

No, he's definitely

somewhere here, yeah.

But only if he wants to be seen.

That's right.

That's right.

- And you've only seen him once?

- Me, oh, yes,

I've seen him one time,

but Willie ray, he...

The Willie ray that lives

over there somewheres.

Yeah, that's him!

That's right, yeah.

Yeah, he's seen him.

The other day i... well,

I bumped into Willie ray

and he... we was fishing

and he was telling...

He runs into Bigfoot

and then they'll hang out

and play games, and go dancing,

and Indian wrestle

and stuff like that.

- Bigfoot?

- That's right.

Wow. Can you describe him?

Oh, yeah, no,

he's about eight feet tall.

He's got a big old head,

big old hair.

Strong.

He's real strong,

you know?

He's like a gorilla man strong.

Wow, wow, thank you

so much, Earl.

- Thank you very much. -Oh,

man, no think nothing of it.

That's fine.

Y'all be careful now, okay?

Wouldn't want anything bad

to happen to any of you.

All I'm saying is

why would he even say that?

Don't listen to him, man.

An eight feet tall gorilla man?

That crusty bastard was crazy.

- I can hear everything

you're saying.

Go, Jamie, attack!

I was... we were talking...

I meant another crusty bastard.

Not you.

- Why's he following us?

- Where were you on that, ass?

- I didn't see him.

- Shut up and keep on moving.

All right, I'll let you be.

Did he just say

he's gonna let us be?

Well, wait, what does it mean?

What the hell

was he planning on doing?

- He's gonna kill us.

- Don't say that.

Shh.

Do we really have to be here

for five days, Steve?

Steve, let's just go

into town, okay?

Yeah, yeah, let's go into town.

- Okay. -Yeah, double time.

Let's go!

Look, Steve, I really think

we can get everything we need

- in two days, right?

- I say we find a deer,

shoot it, skin it, eat it,

and then we leave.

Ooh! That's a movie, Steve!

- I would watch that. -We have

five days to get what we need.

We have a lot left to shoot

and we'll be here

for the remainder of it.

That's what we signed up for.

- I didn't sign up for anything.

- You know what I meant, Mickey.

- Did you sign up for something?

- Yeah, it's a long agreement.

- Oh, great. -He did sound

pretty sure of himself, huh?

- Who Earl?

- He sounded like a lunatic.

We are in unchartered

territory here, guys.

- We can be on to something!

- You know what we're on to?

Finding more

homicidal maniacs...

Five days!

Ugh! I hate this, dude.

- This is a nightmare.

- Well...

- Hi.

- I say it right here.

- Yes.

- All right.

- Hi, I'm here with Walter...

- But how am I gonna talk to you

- if I'm looking in the...

- You can look at both.

At both of you? All right.

Hi, I'm here with Walter Lee.

Hi, I'm here with Reggie.

Hi, I'm here with um...

I'm sorry, what was your name?

It's on my vest.

- Are your kids okay in there?

They're fine.

Don't worry about 'em.

Okay, are you sure?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I fed 'em.

- Sure, I've seen Bigfoot?

- You have?

- Yeah, I've seen him.

- Can you describe him for us?

Sure, yeah, I mean, I saw him.

He's a big hairy guy.

I was sittin' on the couch

with my old lady

and we was watching

the television

and he come across

in that thing where...

- No, no, not on TV.

- He's walking and turned around.

In real life with your own eyes.

- Oh, like real... like... like in 3-d.

- Yes.

Sure, I've seen... oh, yeah,

yeah, yeah, I seen him.

Everybody know that

they be with them chickens

and they be laughing and who

gonna go and bail 'em out?

Cecil gonna bail 'em out,

that's who gonna bail 'em out.

Okay, I think that we actually

have another interview to get to.

I'm talking about Bigfoot.

Steve, let me take

commando over here.

Why, what are you gonna do?

I got it.

Hey there, moose.

We're doing

a documentary on Bigfoot

and we thought maybe

we could have you share

some information with us.

Oh, yeah, yeah, I sure would.

- Whatever you need to know.

- What's your name?

- My name is junior.

- Junior, all right, junior.

So, have you seen

Bigfoot before?

Mm-hmm, I did...

Nah, I didn't see him

- but I actually heard him.

- Oh, wow, you heard him?

- I heard him groan.

- Oh, wow.

I heard his calling.

Well, there is

no scientific fact

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