The Boys in the Band Page #11

He already knows

what it means.

He knows very, very well

what a closet queen is.

Don't you, Alan?

Michael,

if you're insinuating

that I'm homosexual,

I can only say

that you're mistaken.

Am I?

What about Justin Stuart?

What about

Justin Stuart?

You were in love with him.

That's what about him.

And that's who

you're gonna call.

Justin and I were

very good friends.

That's all.

According to Justin,

the friendship was

quite passionate.

What do you mean?

I mean that you slept

with him in college...

several times.

That's not true.

Several times.

Once is youth.

Twice, a phase

maybe.

Several times,

you like it.

That's not true.

It is true!

Because Justin Stuart

is homosexual.

He comes to

New York occasionally.

He calls me. I've

taken him to parties.

Larry's had him once.

I've slept with Justin!

And he's told me

all about you!

Then he told you a lie.

You were obsessed with Justin.

That's all

you could talk about,

morning, noon and night.

You began it tonight

upstairs about Hank,

what an attractive

fellow he was,

and all the rest of

that transparent crap.

I said he was attractive.

That's all.

How many times

do you have to say it?

And how many times did you

have to say it about Justin?

What a good

tennis player he was,

what a good dancer he was,

what a good body he had.

How amusing he was,

how bright he was.

How the girls were

all mad about him.

What close

friends you were!

We were. We were very good,

very close friends. That's all.

It was obvious!

When you did it

in front of Fran,

it was downright

embarrassing.

Even she must have

had her doubts about you.

Justin lied.

If he told you that,

he lied.

And it is a lie.

A vicious lie.

He'd say anything

about me now to get even,

because he could never get over

the fact that I dropped him.

But I had to.

I had to because he told me

all about himself.

He told me that he--

He told me that he wanted me

to be his lover.

And I told him

that he made me sick.

I told him that I pitied him.

You ended the friendship,

Alan,

because you couldn't face

the truth about yourself.

Oh, you could go on

sleeping with Justin...

as long as he lied

to himself,

and you lied

to yourself.

And you both dated girls

and labeled yourselves men,

and called yourselves

just fond friends.

But Justin finally

had to be honest!

And you couldn't

take it.

You-- You couldn't take it,

and so you destroyed

the friendship...

and your friend

along with it.

Justin could never

understand

what he had done wrong

to make you drop him.

He blamed himself.

No.

He did that, yes,

until he discovered

who he was

and what he was.

No.

But to this day

he remembers the treatment,

the scars he got from you.

No!

Pick up this phone

and call Justin.

Call him and apologize,

and tell him what you should've

told him 12 years ago.

Call him.

No, Michael.

He lied.

Not a word is true.

Call him!

Very well.

I'll dial.

You're so helpful.

Give it to me.

Hello.

One point.

It's Alan.

Two points.

Yes.

Yes, it's me.

Is that Justin?

You sound surprised.

I should hope to think

he would be after 12 years.

No, I'm-- I'm

in New York.

I, uh--

I won't explain now.

I-I-- I just called

to tell you that--

I just called to

tell you that I'm here--

"That I love you," goddamn it!

I love you!

And I love you.

You get the goddamn bonus.

Ten points, jackpot.

I love you and I beg you

to forgive me.

Give me that telephone.

Justin, did you hear

what that son of--?

F-Fran?

W-- Well, of course

I knew it was you.

How are you doing?

Uh, fine.

Uh...yes, me too.

Fine.

Um, uh, yes.

He told me all about it.

No, don't thank me,

please. Uh--

Uh, look, I'll-- I'll put him

back on the line.

Give my love to the kids.

Darling.

I'll catch the first

plane I can get.

Yes.

I love you very much.

Yes.

Thank you, Michael.

Who won?

It was a tie.

Now, it's my turn.

And ready or not,

Michael, here goes.

You're a sad

and pathetic man.

You're a homosexual,

and you don't want to be.

But there's nothing

you can do to change it.

Not all your prayers

to your God...

not all the analysis

you can buy

in all the years

you've got left to live.

You may very well

one day be able to know

a heterosexual life...

if you want it

desperately enough.

If you pursue it with the fervor

with which you annihilate.

But you'll always be

homosexual as well.

Always, Michael.

Always.

Until the day you die.

Friends.

Oh.

Thanks for

the nifty party...

and the super gift.

It's just what I needed.

Bernard,...thank you.

Will you

get him home?

Don't worry about her. I'll

take care of everything.

Donald, good to see you.

Good night, Harold.

See you again sometime.

Yeah. How about

a year from Shevouth?

Come on, Tex.

Let's go to my place.

Oh, Michael...

thanks for the laughs.

Call you tomorrow.

Thank you, Michael.

Good night,

Donald.

Goodbye, Emory.

Come on, Bernard.

Time to go home.

Oh, Mary. You're

a heavy mother.

Why did I call?

Why'd I--?

Donald?

Donald. Donald!

What have I done?

My God.

What have I d--?

Michael. Michael.

It's beginning.

The anxiety.

I feel it.

Donald. Don't leave.

Please, don't leave me.

Oh, Jesus.

I can't handle it.

I won't make it.

I won't make it!

Michael--

I won't make it!

Michael, stop it.

Stop it.

Look, I'll-- I'll

give you a Valium.

I've got some in my pocket.

No. No. No.

Pills and alcohol,

I'll die.

I'm not gonna give you

the whole bottle.

Come on, let go of me.

No.

Let go of me long enough for me

to get my hand in my pocket.

No. Don't leave.

Come on.

Come on.

I d-- I don't have any water

to take it with.

Well, if you'll wait

one goddamn minute,

I'll get you some.

Uh, your water,

Your Majesty.

Come on.

Michael, stop that goddamn

crying and take the pill.

I--

I--

I feel like

Old Man River.

I'm tired of living

and I'm scared of dying.

Shh.

Shh. Michael.

Come on. Come on.

Shh.

Michael.

Shh. Shh.

I'm sorry.

If we could just not

hate ourselves so much.

That's it, you know.

If we could just learn

not to hate ourselves...

quite so very much.

I know. I know.

Um-- Inconceivable as

it may be...

you used to be worse

than you are now.

Maybe with

a lot more work, you--

You'll be able to help

yourself some more.

If you try, huh?

Who was it who

always used to say...

"You show me

a happy homosexual,

and I'll show you

a gay corpse."

I don't know. Who was it

that always used to say that?

And how dare you come on

with that holier-than-thou

attitude with me.

With a lot more work, indeed.

You've got

a long row to hoe

before you're perfect,

you know.

I never said

I didn't.

And while we're

on the subject,

I think your analyst

is a quack.

Earlier, you said

he was a prick.

That's right.

He's a quack prick.

Or a prick quack,

whichever you prefer.

Oh, icks,

icks, icks.

Terrible icks.

Tomorrow is gonna be

an ick-packed day.

Do you suppose there's

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