The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes Page #3

Let me go to Marshfield.

Believe me, the drive

and fresh air will do me good.

It'll give my brain

a chance to ventilate.

It couldn't be "A."

It couldn't be "A."

The answer to the last

two questions was "A."

- [Thunder rumbling]

- Would never have three A's

in a row.

It's gotta be "B" or "C."

I haven't seen a "C"

for a long time.

It's gotta be "C" then.

[Sighs]

Got to be "C."

[Squeaking]

"A"?! That's three A's in a row.

That's impossible.

[Sighs]

How do they ever expect anybody

to figure this out?

[Thunder crashes]

[Wind howling]

[Thunder crashes]

[Suspenseful music plays]

[Door closes]

[Click]

[Thunder crashes]

[Thunder crashes]

[Electricity crackling,

computer beeping]

[Whirring]

[Explodes]

[Whirring and beeping

slow to a halt]

[As computerized voice]

3 at 8-02-30.

[Beeping]

Applejack Rainbow Lodge

4378,

animals 750, tables 480,

amusements 624.

[Beeping]

Applejack Pompey Palace,

- Dexter? Dexter?!

- 4379...

[Normal voice] Huh?

Dexter, are you okay?

Yeah.

Did you wake me up

to ask me if I was okay?

Nah, you were beeping.

Burping?

No, beeping.

Oh, that's good.

[Sighs]

[Thunder crashes]

- Hey, Dexter...

- Uh...

What'd you do

to the computer anyway?

W... nothing. I just tried

to put in that part,

and I got

this terrific shock.

Well, there must be

a short in it somewhere.

Yeah, there sure is.

I had to call in

these computer people.

They can't get a spark

out of it.

Well [Sighs]

I'm sorry, professor.

Well...

Sorry I'm late, prof.

Yeah. Well, move along,

boys. Move along.

[Clears throat]

Now, ladies and gentlemen,

this is a speed test.

And that means if you have

trouble with any question,

skip it and move on

to the next one

because you'll be graded

on the total number of questions

you answer correctly.

Is that clear?

All right.

You may begin.

Dexter, come on.

Start the test.

[Chair squeaks]

[Beeping]

[Laughs]

Shh.

[Beeping]

[Page turns]

[Page turns]

[Page turns]

[Beeping]

[Page turns]

[Beeping,

page turns]

[Booklet slams shut]

Shh.

Funny guy.

[Pounding]

[Pounding]

Shh.

[Sighs]

Dexter, cut it out.

[Coughs]

[Chair creaking]

[Clears throat

deliberately]

[Creaking stops]

[Bag rustling]

Shh!

[Rustling continues]

[Crunching]

I tell you, Quigley,

he cheated.

I tell you, Quigley,

he cheated.

It's just as simple

as that.

Spending $20 for a doctor.

That's ridiculous.

He didn't cheat,

Dean Higgins.

Something has happened

to Dexter.

Now, we usually allow an hour

and a half for that test.

And since I've been

at this school,

nobody's ever finished it.

Dexter finished it

in 41/2 minutes,

and he didn't make

a mistake.

Man:
Professor Quigley?

Yes.

[Clicking]

[Switches clicking]

[Sighs]

[Knobs turning]

[Steady buzzing]

[Beeping]

[High-pitched whistle]

Dexter:
I can't go on TV!

I don't even want to go on TV!

Listen, at this rate,

you're gonna faint

in front of all

those people.

Dexter, it isn't that easy.

Things aren't the same.

You have

a responsibility now.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

Listen, Dexter, it's almost

like playing a game.

Now, I know the first few

minutes are gonna be tough.

But, listen, after you

answer a few questions,

you're gonna get

your confidence.

Don't worry

about it, man.

And the thing to remember

is that you're smarter

than all those people.

- That's right.

- That's right.

I am?

That doesn't make any sense.

[Indistinct conversations]

There are going to be

37 million viewers, Quigley.

I tell you,

he'd better come through.

No question.

Oh, Mayor Collins.

Nice to see you, Mayor.

Take a seat right down

front, Mayor.

Ha! It's the mayor.

I tell you, Quigley,

Medfield has really brought out

the fat cats tonight. Ha!

Mayor Collins and there's

Councilman Cooper over there

and Supervisor Straight

and there's, uh,

oh, he's not anything.

Oh, there's Dean Collingsgood

in the booth.

Hello, Dean!

Ha ha!

Dean Coll...

what's he doing here?

Well, it's perfectly natural

for a dean of the state

university to be here.

Well, I don't like it.

Every time I see him,

I have to hear about

his building program.

Building, building,

building.

It's enough

to make you sick.

Ha ha ha ha!

- Hello, Eugene. Hello.

- Dean, nice of you

to come.

Say, what about that

boy wonder of yours?

I've been hearing

great things.

Well, you know, at Medfield,

the scholastic...

Nice to see you.

I would have gotten

over here sooner,

but I've been tied up planning

our new science building.

Building, building,

build...

You know, Quigley,

sometimes I think I should

have taken up contracting

instead of education.

[Chuckles]

Say, Eugene, I was talking

to some of our faculty today,

and we thought

it might be a good idea

if we had a sort of a

Dexter Reilly rally at State.

So many of our teachers

want to meet him...

No. I-I mean,

he's all booked up.

Uh-huh. Well, we can

work something out.

Man:
30 seconds,

ladies and gentlemen.

Oh, I'd better take

my seat.

I've been invited to sit

in the control room.

[Chuckles]

In the control room.

I tell you, he's trying to steal

that boy away from us.

Oh, you're exaggerating

a little, Dean Higgins.

I'm sure of it.

You don't understand him,

Quigley. The man is greedy.

He's up to his throat

in state money, and

still he's greedy.

[Dramatic music plays]

[Applause]

On behalf

of the major networks,

I would like to extend thanks

to our learned panel

who has come here tonight

from all parts of our land

in the interests of science

and education.

[Applause]

And, of course, special thanks

to the one who is the reason

we are gathered here...

the wizard of Medfield

College... Dexter Reilly.

- Yay!

- Yay!

- Yay!

Each of our learned guests

will be allowed 3 questions.

Our first questions will be

from Dr. Rufus Schmidt,

head of the Department

of Higher Mathematics

at Purdue University.

Dr. Schmidt.

Thank you.

Mr. Reilly, you're acquainted

with the mathematical subject

of calculus?

Well, I...

[Feedback]

[Feedback stops]

I, uh, I guess I am.

I kind of looked at the text

this morning.

I see.

Mr. Reilly, using

the fundamental theorem

of advanced calculus,

and applying the formula

that the square of a distance

from the origin to "P"

is equal to "X" squared

plus "Y" squared

plus "Z" squared.

Now, could you tell us

the point of the plane

where X + 4, Y-1, Z =26?

- [Beeping]

- The point is where "X" is

equal to 3, "Y" is equal to 4,

and "Z" is equal to -1.

The answer's quite right.

[Applause]

You see?

He's getting his confidence.

I told you.

Your next question,

Dr. Schmidt.

Mr. Reilly, my next question

is an exercise

in mental gymnastics.

Could you please tell us

what 13 to the 9th power

would be

and then give us

the square root

of that product?

13 to the 9th power would be

- [Beeping]

- 10,604,499,373.

The square root of that product

would be...

102,978. 14997852.

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