The Corridor Page #2

it is unrecorded

in any scorebook

that is...

Unrecorded?

Show me. I'd love to see it.

# Forever #

# I told her #

# I'm not that kind of guy #

# She said we'd communicate #

# Much better #

# If my dial-up was Wi-Fi #

All right.

# She drives me crazy #

# With her blogs and vlogs #

# Her Skypes and Twitters

and URLs #

# Guess I'll always be

a top-loading VCR #

# In this motherfucking

Bluetooth world #

F***, yeah.

And here we go.

Whoo!

Come on now, Chris.

It's just those old strings,

Chrissy.

Yeah.

I'm gonna... gonna go wash these.

I thought of that before I came down

and brought a new set.

And that's 'cause...

You're my favorite.

Of course.

I believe it's time for more football.

Bob, we've been watching

football for three hours.

I don't care.

- Really?

- Yeah.

Bob, look, no.

I've watched your...

- Guys!

- Please!

Much love.

Just let me pick one.

No way, man.

It's a football-only VCR.

- You know the rules.

- Really?

I am sitting out there with strangers.

Chris, listen, I...

No, Ty, wait. Let me go first.

There's something that

I want to talk to you about.

They wouldn't even

let me go to her funeral.

Now I'm wrecking this one too.

All I can say is that,

that part of Mom

that was always Mom

would never hurt me.

Then she did this.

And then I don't remember much.

I never thought

I could hurt you, and I did.

Chicks dig scars.

We look like cowboys now.

Right.

But I am still me,

you know?

That's what these pills

are for.

They're not supposed

to remind you that I... I'm crazy

but that I'm good now.

Even in the bin, I tried

to get them to hear that.

My shrink...

her name's Megan...

she would give me all these

mental checks I could do,

like counting down sevens

and stuff,

but I'd look around

at these other guys.

One guy's, like,

spinning hankies

like they're propellers.

Another guy's rocking

back and forth, clapping,

going, "Megan, Megan,

Megan, Megan,

Megan, Megan, Meg"...

So I stop her.

I stop her.

And I go, "Listen,

you got to get me out of here. "

And she tells me

I'm sick.

And I go, "Yeah, I know.

But these motherfuckers

are crazy!"

You're a piece of sh*t.

That was a setup.

Maybe.

Maybe not.

But there'd be days

where I'd think,

I got to hold on

to that stuff

for when I'm with the guys.

And then there were other days

where I'd wonder,

why the hell would you give me

a second chance?

I'm not going back there.

I promise.

Well, enough of this depressing sh*t.

This was supposed to be

a funeral.

You were gonna tell me something before?

I was just gonna do a toast.

To the only mom

who let us play monster tag

at 2:
00 in the morning.

Or let us eat a bowl

of Cheezies with milk on them.

It tastes like Kraft Dinner.

We got away with murder,

man.

She was one of the

good ones, Pauline.

An empty glass

is bad luck, Ty.

Just, gentle.

To Pauline.

To Pauline.

Love you, Mom.

So who bunks upstairs,

and who gets the floor?

- I'm going...

- Boom.

- All right.

- In.

- Oh!

- Boom!

So, what, you just thought

that it was gonna be

a big celebration

when we came out here?

I'm with Ev, all right?

The five of us come up here

for a boys' weekend,

and it's couples therapy?

Don't I get enough of that

in couples therapy?

Hey, look, did Ev booze Tyler up?

Like, more than the once?

Come on.

Man, he is just pushing his luck.

How about you?

It looked like you were gonna

tell Tyler you're moving.

How did you know that?

Come on.

Your mom talks to my mom.

They're gossipy b*tches.

I don't know.

I just feel like I need

to get on a new path, you know?

Like I missed a connection

somewhere or...

I wouldn't tell him.

He'll lose it.

I'm allowed to move.

I mean, look at Jim.

Look how it changed

his game.

Don't you mean "Mr. Huggan"?

F***.

You know, at least

the old Huggsy knew his place.

Now we got to deal

with this a**hole?

Ah, Bobby, that's in your head.

Maybe.

But you need to be careful

what's in Ty's.

Look, man, all I'm

trying to say is that

if you're gonna tell him

you're moving,

you better move quick.

Like, run.

Shut up.

Oof.

Hey, Bobby.

Yeah?

I got an idea.

Minus 7 is...

Is 86.

Okay.

Back to the retreat.

Hello?

Mom?

Holy...

Jesus.

So you went out last night.

I can't lie, man.

I'm not feeling too good.

Yeah, well, we're all

going through stuff, Ty.

And you all keep telling me

about it.

Then you could tell me yours.

I mean,

I deserve both barrels.

All right.

Both barrels, then.

This is arthritic now.

I'm old before my time.

And I still don't know

what I'm gonna be

when I grow up.

You know, I thought that, uh,

this was finally it.

And now, rehab done,

and I am back

to the back of the line.

What's sign language for "I'm sorry"?

But now you're not feeling

so good?

I think I'm still seeing stuff.

What did you see?

I know I've got no right,

but would you just

come with me?

Please.

Just you.

Hey, listen to me, Ty.

Ev was slipping booze

into your drink all night.

Why didn't you tell

me that straight off?

Look, it was a shithead thing

for him to do,

and, hey,

we got back at him for it.

I... I saw...

a shape,

in the woods,

a person.

Ty. Meds? Booze?

You didn't see anything.

Look, we're coming out.

I've been waiting years

for you two to come out.

Ty, after breakfast,

I will go with you, okay?

It's all yours.

Were you guys tossing

some salad in here?

Hey, has he noticed yet?

No. Shh.

Oh, you cock-knockers!

How am I supposed

to make tips?

This is some juvenile

bullshit, boys.

An eyebrow for an eye.

Seems like

I'm nursing a hangover.

See, I thought that this

was a boys' weekend,

not a little boys' weekend.

Just a little something

for my brain to idle.

It's not idling, Jim.

It's reverse.

Jesus, hanging out with,

"Katie, did you pack

my puzzles?"

And...

"I'm unleaded now,

remember?

"Doctor's orders.

I can't drink anything. "

Ev, Ty had nothing to do with this.

No?

I went for a walk.

Great.

We all came up here for you,

and you want to be alone,

in the dark,

in the woods.

Well, as long as everyone else

is comfortable with that.

I got it.

I don't know why

I always have to be the one...

You guys have to stare

in the face of some sh*t.

Listen, Ev.

I need you to have my back.

With what?

I'm nervous.

Me too.

Why are we doing this?

Cause Chris would do it for us.

Shut the f*** up.

All right, Jim?

Yes.

Just keep walking.

You'll know it

when you get there.

Trust me.

What am I supposed

to say, Ty?

Am I in the wrong place?

This is the part where I tell you

that I'm not crazy.

It was...

It was a box.

I was in a... a box.

I don't follow you.

It was around me, but it wasn't there.

An invisible box?

It blocked the weather.

Oh, f***, listen to me!

Hard not to!

Needed some backup, did you?

Just in case?

All for one and one for all, huh?

You want to show him

something?

We're not seeing very much.

Well, whatever it was,

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