The Devil and Miss Jones Page #3

and worked up to assistant section manager.

Now, our quarrel is simple.

We're given a small raise every year.

Thanks.

At the end of 10 or 15 years when our

salary is higher than a new employs

we're let out

Now this is a regular practice

at the store mind you.

Probably good bookkeeping...

But, I think that it's pretty unfair.

We're entitled to some security in exchange...

...for a quarter of a lifetime of loyalty

to one employer.

Um, may I interrupt please?

I've attended many of these meetings

but I've never spoken before.

I'd like to show you a practical case

of what we're fighting for if I may.

Certainly, Mary.

Step up here.

This is Miss Jones of childrens shoes.

(Applause)

Mr Higgins, would you step up here please?

Mr. Higgins!

Mr. Higgins!

Step up here, will you please?

This is Thomas Higgins.

How old are you Mr. Higgins.

Fifty five.

Now don't be nervious, Tom.

He's 55. Now that's not so very old.

Look at him, he's bright,

alert, has all his faculties...

...Can you honestly expect to be

in better condition at his age?

I hardly think so.

This then is the picture

of you...and me...

at 55 years of age.

Now I'm going to tell you

the rest of that picture.

He came to work this morning

in childrens shoes...

without the few cents in his

pocket he needed to buy lunch.

And that isn't all.

I gave him 50 cents.

Do you know what he did with it?

He kept it because he needed

even that 50 cents...

...more than he needed food.

Maybe for medicine.

Maybe for a place to sleep tonight,

I don't know. I didn't ask him

I felt too ashamed for him.

Do you want to know how he got his lunch?

From another employee.

Sharing the few crusts she brought

which were hardly enough for herself.

Fifty five years old...

...and nothing to eat.

By what kind fate did he

get a job today I'll never know.

And how long will the store keep him?

And what will become of him

when they let him out?

And he will be let out, he has been before.

He worked 15 years. 15 long

loyal years and they let him go.

Before that, he had a job for 10 years.

Twenty five years for only two employers.

Surely this man must have

been capable of holding a job.

And yet, now.

White haired...

Friendless...

He faces another employer.

Who will use him.

and when he's through with him,

he'll throw him aside...

...for a younger man.

Leaving him insecure, friendless, homeless...

with noone to turn to except

charity and the poorhouse.

Please, take your seat.

You were wonderful.

I didn't do anything.

Alright everybody.

If you don't think that we're right

now nothing will ever convince you.

Are you with us or aren't you?

We sure are Joe.

We're with you Joe.

What do you think their complaint is?

They are getting too much money.

That's what it is actually.

I knew they were crackpots.

Why don't they make themselves so

indispensible the store can't fire them?

Oh no. That's too hard. Heh

I'm glad I saw this.

I found out who some of them are.

The first day too.

Not all of them, just give

me another couple of days.

Heh. The idiots.

Making me one of them.

I'll show them who hangs who.

Shall I crumple them, sir?

Graham crackers, take it away.

And let me tell you another thing...

If I'm not sick by tonight or

tomorrow at the latest

my fancy Doctor Schindler from Vienna,

will wish he was back in Vienna.

Yes, sir.

And I want a lunch prepared for

me tomorrow to take along.

In a shoe box.

Yes, sir.

I want tunafish popovers.

Tunafish popovers?!

Tunafish popovers?

You heard me.

I wonder, I wonder if the chef

can make tunafish popovers?

Then get one who does.

If certain people can make

them on a little gas stove...

then that idiot downstairs ought to be

able to make them in that whole restaurant.

Yes, sir.

I didn't do so well selling

things today.

It's just a matter of luck.

Yes sir.

What I want you to do...

is to get a little girl...

...and bring her to the shoe department

tomorrow at exactly ten after twelve.

Is there anything

I can do for you sir?

I thought, I thought I would buy

some shoes for my little girl.

Shoes for the little girl, yes sir.

Certainly sir.

Won't you be seated.

Yes sir. I mean certainly.

He'll bungle it.

No, he's pretty good Mr. Hooper.

I've been watching him. (Snort)

I want you to buy a dozen pair of shoes.

Eleven? I think that's too many.

They'll get suspicious.

You think so?

Yes, sir.

Alright, then a half dozen.

No less.

No, sir, half-a-dozen.

One and a half.

Thank you.

This is your chance.

Now don't be nervious.

I'm not nervious. Stop talking about it.

What size do you want?

One and a half.

Here. Now don't be nervious.

For heavens sake.

Is this the hardest shoe to sell?

What's the hardest shoe to

get rid of in the whole stock?

The hardest?

Yes.

Well, we have some hightops that

haven't moved for years.

25 cent bonus for each pair you sell.

Fine. These are the ones I want.

Don't you think that you'd better start on these?

How many of those do you got in stock?

Five.

That's too bad. I could sell six.

I wish that you'd try to sell the ordinary shoes,

you're making trouble for yourself.

Now. Here we are.

Just slip your foot in.

I don't like that.

Come come now.

Put your foot in the shoe Sally.

I don't want to, I don't like it.

Put your foot in.

I don't like it!

Where'd you get this brat?

She belongs to the upstairs maid.

If she doesn't stop squirming there's

going to be another upstairs maid.

Stop squirming dear.

I don't like it! I don't like it!

No! No! No!

I knew he didn't have the

personality for shoes.

Stop squirming dear.

I don't like it! I don't like it!

No, no, no...

I don't like it!

Grab hold of her, grab hold of her.

Well, well, well.

How are we coming along?

Fine!

Mr. Higgins.

We're not shoeing a horse you know?

Look. Look what I've

got for the little lady.

You're quite sure that

you want this type of shoe?

Yes, sir. This is the type that I want.

Hmm. All five pairs.

I've been looking for this model.

They are very hard to find.

(Nudges Higgins) There's someone at your

slipper counter. I'll take care of this customer.

I've got these shoes sold.

There's someone at your slipper counter.

He's not a regular shoe salesman.

I'm the section manager but

I'm going to wait on you myself.

Thank you.

There's someone at your slipper counter.

Will you take them with you sir

or shall I send them?

Are you taking these shoes sir?

Yes, sir. Wrap them up please.

(Higgins waves)

(Higgins falls)

Now young lady, your own shoe.

Fire Section Manager!

Don't you feel badly

He'll get his just desserts

one of these days.

I'd like to be as certain

of the hereafter Miss Jones.

And don't lose confidence in yourself.

You could've sold them just as well.

He only brought it in cause

he wanted to get the bonus.

I don't remember when I've ever

disliked anyone as hardily as I do him.

And I've disliked quite a

few people in my time...

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