The Do-Over Page #10

---

We have to make sure

we get it into the right hands

before Max finds it.

Oh, and, Charlie...

be careful.

I don't wanna lose you, too.

Yeah.

Aw...

He's so sweet.

Actually, you are, too.

I would have rather f***ed you.

Put a bullet in his head.

- Mmm.

- Relax. I'm not going to shoot you.

That would be too quick.

There's still so much fun for us to have.

Hours of fun.

Ooh...

Look out!

Nice try, a**hole.

That's how he would have wanted to go.

Charlie!

- Charlie!

- Hey.

Hey, baby. Baby.

- Oh, my God, are you okay?

- I was so worried about you.

I know, I'm freaking out.

I can't believe Max

would do that to Shecky.

It's like we don't know anyone.

My husband, your best friend...

- Money makes people crazy, Charlie.

- I know. I know.

Did you bring the tablet?

Of course, of course.

It's right here.

Yeah?

Oh!

Motherf***er!

What the hell, Charlie?

You picked the wrong guy to play, lady.

I do know Max and he would

never kill an innocent man!

Well, I'm about to.

I'm so tired...

...of women lying to me...

...and f***ing me over!

You know why everyone

treats you like that, Charlie?

- Because you're such a p*ssy!

- Ow!

God damn it!

Ow...

Ow!

I believe this is mine.

It's been fun, Charlie.

No, no, no.

Before you kill me...

I want to tell you something.

After we had sex...

you farted in your sleep.

Like, six times.

Yeah, well, no one but you

will ever know that,

because there's no way you're faking

your way out of this death, Charlie.

No.

No!

Max! Ow! God!

- Oh, I'm sorry, buddy.

- Charlie.

I love you. Oh, man, I didn't

mean that sh*t I said about you.

F*** that sh*t.

I don't give a f***, man.

I just popped the perfect wheelie.

I could be a cop.

Did you see that?

- All I had to do was f***ing...

- I saw the whole thing.

- You looked good.

- Come on.

It's dj vu.

I get to kill Butch and Ronnie

all over again.

You two wanna tickle each other's

balls first, like they used to?

Or should I kill you straight away?

Stay where you are!

Drop your weapon

and get your hands in the air!

- No!

- What happened?

What?

- Oh, no!

- What the f***?

What, what?

You f***ing threw the sh*t

in the f***ing water!

There was

a gun pointed at my head!

Bob?

From American Express Bob?

Actually it's Bob from the FBI.

Oh... sh*t.

Here, take the dinosaur.

Yeah, go play.

What is it?

We fished the tablet out of the water.

I had my best tech guys take a look at it.

And, uh...

it's a goner.

All right.

I'm really sorry.

Oh, baby, we'll find another way.

We're gonna find another way.

Yeah.

We'll keep fighting.

We'll keep fighting.

Mrs. Kessler...

your husband's under arrest.

When your friend finishes getting

his broken ribs patched up,

I gotta take both of you directly to jail.

F*** he is, man!

Do you know how long

I've waited for this one?

- Sorry, baby.

- All right, we're good.

- We're good.

- Real emotional.

What's this?

What's this? Wait! Wait! Whoa!

Whoa! He's got broken ribs...

why is he knocked out right now?

We're taking him into surgery.

We found something rather alarming

in his rectum.

- What? What?

- What just happened?

It appears to be a USB drive.

You backed it up?

He backed it up!

- You careful motherf***er! Yes!

- Oh!

Yes!

Charlie!

You did it, boy! Yes!

Yeah!

You know,

a good friend of mine once told me,

"You always have to have

a rubber in your wallet

and an umbrella in your trunk,

'cause you never know when

you're gonna f*** in the rain."

He also suggested carrying

around zombie makeup

for those times when

you want to strike terror

into the hearts of people

who screwed you over.

Please don't eat me.

Don't eat me! Eat her!

Go get your own f***ing fortune cookies!

And most importantly,

when you're really in trouble,

when you've committed many,

many crimes

across several states

and a US territory...

there's only one chip that can

get you off scot-free.

One card that you can play

to get you out of anything.

An effective treatment for cancer.

Good job!

- That was so...

- Yeah.

Yeah.

What are you doing, Mother?

Why would you do that, Ma?

I just wanted to bring back

some sweet memories to Charlie.

That's really nice, Ma.

He's crying. You happy?

Do they still look as good as they looked

when you peeked on me in the shower?

They're even better!

He's being polite.

It's awful!

They might have a

few more miles on them...

- but they still taste brand new.

- Oh!

All right, enjoy yourself, Ma,

you're in Puerto Rico.

Hey, come on.

Let's do this.

No, no, no, no, I'm tired.

I'm sorry.

- Do it, you should.

- You're in remission.

You can't play that cancer card anymore.

Let's go.

Hey! Just do it so we can go out and eat.

I'm f***in' starving!

- Carmine, be nice.

- I am nice.

- I have low blood sugar, you know that.

- Carmine's hungry!

You can't f***ing keep him waitin'.

Let's go!

Let's go!

All right, love you guys.

- Be safe!

- Yep.

Sure about this, tough guy?

F*** yes.

You only live twice, right?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes