The End of the Tour Page #9

what you’re sayin’? Is gratifying on

a fairly I think simple mammal level.

LIPSKY:

I know. Why is that?

50.

DAVID:

I think pretty girls are what we most

sort of dream and despair of ever

having, of ever paying attention to

you. And there they are, in the front

row, making eyes at you.

LIPSKY:

I think my girlfriend is in love you.

DAVID:

No she’s not.

LIPSKY:

I think she is. I think she likes

your writing more than she likes mine.

It’s getting kind of annoying.

DAVID:

Get her on the phone.

LIPSKY:

No, she’s probably sleeping anyway.

A beat.

DAVID:

Please?

71

INT. HOTEL WHITNEY/DAVID'S ROOM - MINNEAPOLIS - 1996 -71

MOMENTS LATER:

Lipsky holds the phone. We HEAR Sarah’s voice.

SARAH’S VOICE

(over the phone) Hello?

LIPSKY:

Hi.

SARAH’S VOICE

Hi! How’s it going?

LIPSKY:

It’s fine. Did I wake you up?

SARAH’S VOICE

No, I’m up reading Infinite Jest.

It’s pretty amazing.

LIPSKY:

Good. Listen:
Somebody wants to say

hello. Hold on a sec.

51.

He hands the receiver to David.

DAVID:

(whispers to Lipsky) What’s her name

again?

LIPSKY:

Sarah.

David speaks into the phone. (When David is on the phone, we

-and Lipsky - hear only his side of the conversation.)

DAVID:

Sarah? Hi. It’s Dave Wallace.

Lipsky tries to reclaim the phone a couple of times during

the following but David, engaged in a power play, retains

control:
his way of re-asserting himself after Lipsky’s

perceived transgressions with David’s women friends.

DAVID:

Nice to meet you telephonically, too.

Let me ask him. (to Lipsky) Are you

behaving yourself?

LIPSKY:

She’s asking that?

DAVID:

(to Sarah) I’m reasonably sure he is.

I don’t have eyes on him 24/7.

Lipsky reaches for the phone but David continues talking.

DAVID (CONT’D)

What’re you up to tonight? Oh, wow.

You’re kidding me. Oh my gosh. What

part are you up to? Wow, you’re

really far along! Oh, thank you.

That’s very flattering.

Now that David’s talking about the book, Lipsky gives up in

frustration, plops into a chair, and quietly seethes.

72 INT. HOTEL WHITNEY/LIPSKY'S ROOM - MINNEAPOLIS - 1996 - LATER72

Lipsky, in bed, is on the phone with Sarah. He’s livid.

LIPSKY:

What the f*** was that about?

SARAH’S VOICE

(over phone) What.

52.

LIPSKY:

You were on the phone with him for

like a half hour!

SARAH’S VOICE

It wasn’t a half hour...

LIPSKY:

It was! It was twenty-five minutes; I

timed it! You were only supposed to

say hello!

73 INT. HOTEL WHITNEY/CORRIDOR/DAVID'S ROOM - MINNEAPOLIS - 199673

-MORNING

Lipsky leaves his room and goes down the hall to collect

David. He knocks on his door. Listens. TV sounds from

inside. Knocks again.

LIPSKY:

David? Escort’s waiting. We gotta go.

David, still in boxers and Chicago Cubs t-shirt, frazzled,

opens the door.

DAVID:

Sorry, man. Got totally lost in an

orgy of crap.

David ducks into the bathroom.

DAVID:

A simultaneous broadcast of Falcon

Crest, Magnum P.I., and Charlie’s

Angels:
A perfect storm of sh*t. Out

in a minute.

We hear the shower running. Lipsky sits on the bed watching

Jaclyn Smith and Farrah Fawcett.

74 EXT. HOTEL WHITNEY/LOBBY - MINNEAPOLIS - 1996 - MORNING 74

Lipsky and David, with his shower-wet hair pinned up, find

Patty’s car out front. They get in the backseat.

PATTY:

You’re wearing that?

DAVID:

For a radio interview? Yes.

75 Her disapproval showing, she pulls away. 75

53.

76 INT. MINNESOTA PUBLIC RADIO/LOBBY/CORRIDOR - ST PAUL - 1996 -76

DAY:

A pretty PRODUCTION ASSISTANT greets David and Lipsky.

DAVID:

Hi. Dave. Dave Wallace.

P.A.

(blushes)

I know who you are.

David introduces Lipsky.

DAVID:

My amanuensis, Mr. Boswell.

The P.A. shakes Lipsky’s hand, playing along with the joke.

P.A.

(in greeting)

“Mr. Boswell.” Right this way.

She leads David, followed by Lipsky, down a corridor past

glass-walled studios. Lipsky sees people recognize David,

whisper among themselves. Young women smile shyly, excited

to be in the presence of a cool celebrity.

P.A.

We record digitally. I hope that’s OK.

DAVID:

So only yes or no answers?

She rolls her eyes. Lipsky laughs, David sees him scribble

in his pad.

DAVID:

If you do a really mean job, I have

twenty years to get you back.

Remember that.

76A INT. MINNESOTA PUBLIC RADIO/NPR STUDIO - 1996 - DAY 76A

The interview goes on the air. Lipsky observes from outside

the booth. The NPR GUY has a good radio voice.

NPR GUY:

My guest today is David Foster

Wallace, who has burst on the literary

scene with his 1,079-page, three-poundthree-

ounce novel, Infinite Jest.

54.

Jay McInerney called it “something

like a sleek Vonnegut chassis wrapped

in layers of post-millennial Zola.”

David Foster Wallace, welcome to our

show.

DAVID:

Thank you, glad to be here.

He exchanges looks with Lipsky outside the booth.

NPR GUY:

You have said that you saw yourself as

- quote - “a combination of being

incredibly shy, and being an

egomaniac, too.”

DAVID:

I think I said “exhibitionist, also.”

NPR GUY:

Meaning?

David glances at Lipsky.

DAVID:

Well, I think being shy basically

means being self-absorbed to the

extent that it makes it difficult to

be around other people.

NPR GUY:

Difficult for you, or difficult for

the other people?

DAVID:

I suppose a little bit of both.

77

I/E. PATTY'S CAR/MINNESOTA PUBLIC RADIO - ST PAUL - 1996 -77

DAY:

Patty waits outside her car as the Davids join her.

PATTY:

That was wonderful! I listened to the

whole show! So interesting! I may

have to buy your book and read it!

DAVID:

Sorry about that.

David and Lipsky climb in.

55.

PATTY:

So, you have the rest of the day free.

Where would you like to go?

DAVID:

Do you know where the Mall of Americais?

79 E./I. MALL OF AMERICA/VARIOUS SHOPS - MINNESOTA - 1996 - DAY 79

They discover the vast courts at each corner of the mall.

They walk through the amusement park; ride a roller coaster;

ride a carousel. In a mirror maze, they make their waythrough, trying not to bump into the walls. They try flightsimulators, play mini-golf, and walk through the underwatertunnels of the aquarium. They stare blankly at Build-a-Bearbear parts which stare blankly back at them.

80 INT. MALL OF AMERICA/FOOD COURT - MINNESOTA - 1996 - DAY 80

David and Lipsky sit over lunch, the recorder running on thetable between them. They watch SHOPPERS.

DAVID:

I wanted to write something that hadkind of the texture of what life was

like in America right now: Thisenormous tsunami of stuff comin’ at

you. And also - it’s not unfun.

LIPSKY:

Not at all. It is sort of heavy,

though. I mean weight-wise.

DAVID:

My friend said when it hit the porch,

it sounded like a car bomb going off.

LIPSKY:

Who are your readers? College kids?

DAVID:

The people who seem most enthusiastic

are young men. Which I guess I canunderstand - it’s a fairly male book,

a fairly nerdy book, about loneliness.

You can expect that somebody who'swilling to read and read hard a

thousand-page book is gonna besomebody with some loneliness issues.

LIPSKY:

You think it’s about loneliness?

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