The Fault in Our Stars Page #18

HAZEL:

I hope you're right.

GUS:

I'm in love with you.

68.

That gets her attention.

GUS:

You heard me.

HAZEL:

AUGUSTUS --

GUS:

I'm in love with you. And I know

that love is just a shout into the

void, and that oblivion is

inevitable, and that we're all

doomed and that there will come a

day when all our labor has been

returned to dust, and I know the

sun will swallow the only earth

we'll ever have, and I am in love

with you.

(shrugs, matter-of-fact)

Sorry.

At which point, the Waiter reappears.

WAITER:

More stars?

Hazel is still too speechless to respond, her eyes fixed on

Gus. Eventually Gus answers for them.

GUS:

Just the check, please.

WAITER:

No, sir.

(BEAT)

Your meal has been paid for by Mr.

Van Houten.

Gus raises his eyebrows at Hazel. This Van Houten guy is

something else.

EXT AMSTERDAM CANALS - LATER

Hazel and Gus on a park bench, his arm around her, looking

out over the water. Seeds blow from the elm trees and the

reflections of the city ripple in the water below them.

Hazel leans into his body, just a little. They stay like

that, savoring the best night of both of their lives. CUT TO:

EXT AMSTERDAM - HOTEL - ESTABLISHING

A crisp Spring morning in Amsterdam. The buzz in the air

outside is equalled by the buzz in:

69.

INT HOTEL ROOM - SAME

Where Hazel excitedly paces through the room.

FRANNIE:

I really don't get that shirt.

Hazel wears a screen print t-shirt of Magritte's "Ceci N'est

Pas Une Pipe." (A painting of a pipe with words below that

mean "This is not a pipe.")

HAZEL:

Van Houten will get it. Trust me.

There are like fifty Magritte

references in "Imperial

Affliction."

FRANNIE:

(READING)

"This is not a pipe."

HAZEL:

Exactly.

FRANNIE:

But it is a pipe.

HAZEL:

No it's not. It's a drawing of a

pipe. See?

(SHE DOESN'T)

All representations of a thing are

inherently abstract. A drawing of a

thing is not the thing itself. Nor

is a t-shirt of a drawing of a

thing the thing itself.

Frannie is still at a loss but she's impressed.

FRANNIE:

When did you get so grown up? I

feel like it was yesterday I was

telling 8-year old Hazel why the

sky was blue. You thought I was a

genius back then.

HAZEL:

Why is the sky blue?

FRANNIE:

(BEAT)

Because I say so.

A knock on the door. Gus pokes his head in.

GUS:

Who's ready for some answers!

70.

EXT. VONDELSTRAAT ROW HOUSES - LATER

Gus and Hazel stand outside Van Houten's white house.

HAZEL:

I'm so excited I can barely

breathe.

GUS:

As opposed to other days...?

She playfully hits him. He takes her arm, picks up the oxygen

tank, and up they go towards his front door.

As they approach, there's a noticeable NOISE coming from

inside the house. It's the deep thump of a BASS BEAT. Loud.

Like, obnoxiously loud.

Hazel grabs the brass ornament and knocks. They wait. There's

no response.

GUS:

Maybe he can't hear over the music?

Gus tries again, this time with more force. Still nothing. He

tries a third time. Finally, the music stops. They wait.

Still excited.

A moment later the door swings open.

It's a MAN IN PAJAMAS (60s), with a huge potbelly, thinning

hair, and a week-old beard. All he says is:

MAN IN PAJAMAS:

What?!

Gus and Hazel look to one another. Could it be?

GUS:

Mr. Van Houten?

At which point, the Pajama Man slams the door in their faces.

Hazel and Gus are too stunned to react. Through the closed

door, they hear this:

MAN IN PAJAMAS (O.S.)

(SHOUTING)

LEEE-DUH-VIGH!

WOMAN'S VOICE (O.S.)

Are they here, Peter?

So it is PETER VAN HOUTEN. Gus and Hazel can't believe it.

MAN IN PAJAMAS (O.S.)

There are two --

(BEAT)

Who the hell's "they?"

71.

WOMAN'S VOICE (O.S.)

They are Augustus and Hazel, the

young fans with whom you've been

corresponding.

Gus and Hazel smile at hearing their names. Perhaps this will

help things take a turn for the better.

MAN IN PAJAMAS (O.S.)

The Americans?

WOMAN'S VOICE (O.S.)

You invited them, remember?

MAN IN PAJAMAS (O.S.)

You know why I left America,

Lidewij? To never have to encounter

Americans. Get rid of them.

Hazel and Gus can't believe it. This is terrible!

WOMAN'S VOICE (O.S.)

I will not do this Peter. Be nice.

At which point, the door opens - opened by the Woman whose

voice they'd been hearing - Van Houten's assistant LIDEWIJ

(30s, Dutch, pretty in a bookish way). She virtually shoves

Van Houten towards a stunned Gus and Hazel.

And they are again face-to-face with Van Houten. One beat,

two beats. No one knows what to say. Finally:

VAN HOUTEN:

Which of you is Augustus Waters?

Gus raises his hand tentatively.

Van Houten sizes them up. Without another word, he turns and

walks inside - at least this time, leaving the door ajar.

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