The Female Brain Page #4

---

It sounds like,

you're like

becoming a zombie.

- You wanna go

one more round?

- Yeah.

[instrumental music]

Hi, Abigail.

Oh, I could not..

I could not sleep

last night.

I was so tired,

I took an Ambien

which made me groggy

so this is espresso.

But, like,

I'm still feeling groggy

then I'll just like

take an Adderall.

No. Wait.

Okay. I'm sorry.

Where do you get

all these pills?

Oh, my brother

gave me the Ambien

and my gyno gave me

the Adderall.

No, no, okay,

so, first of all

your gyno's

only jurisdiction

are your nether regions.

So, fire her.

And second, you shouldn't

take your brother's Ambien

because Ambien metabolizes

differently in men

and women.

So you can't just

take the same dose.

That explains a lot..

When a female

overmedicates her brain

her neurochemicals

become imbalanced

resulting in fatigue

and suppression

of healthy emotion.

Because medications

affect hormone levels

they can also lead us

to smell pheromones

differently

which can even cause us

to select

the wrong mates.

It really does.

- Damn it.

- What?

I've done the

spatial awareness test

four times

and women are

still scoring

twenty percent

less than men

on spatial tests.

Okay, but the subjects

weren't primed

and you took

the time limit off.

There's gotta be

another bias.

I don't know.

What about time of day?

Right?

Because I cannot memorize

shapes at 8 a.m.

It's criminal.

That's interesting.

Okay.

Okay. Um..

Blood sugar.

Subjects probably have

lower blood sugar

in the morning

so we should administer

the test again

in the afternoon.

- Smart!

- Cool, cool, cool.

But, um..

It just sounds like

you don't like the results

you're getting.

Of course I don't.

The last thing people need

is more ammunition

for negative female

stereotypes.

They'll be like,

"Oh, Dr. Brizendine

found that women are worse

"at spatial tasks,

which is why women can't

drive or read maps.

And why they

shouldn't be CEOs

or be in government."

And I don't want to be

responsible for that.

Okay? So we'll..

We'll administer

the test again next week.

Oh, one more thing!

Can you stop drinking

all that coffee?

It's just made of

actual acid.

I take Zantac.

It's like not that

big of a deal.

Good morning.

So, a female

can instantly decode

the information encrypted

in a male's pheromones

which helps her determine

genetic compatibility.

This, coupled with

cultural values

and how her

childhood went

determines

what attracts us

to a potential mate.

The confluence

of all this

is what we

call chemistry

or love at first sight.

Hello. We're good.

Oh -- oh, okay!

Thank you. Morning.

Uh, I'm -- I'm

Dr. Brizendine.

I'll be administering

the test on you today.

I'm Kevin. I'm gonna be

taking the test today.

Although men have

earned the reputation

for being more

stoic than women

they actually

have stronger

emotional reactions

than females.

But due to

social conditioning

within 2.5 seconds

a man tends to change

his face

to hide or

suppress emotion.

You're just gonna be

in the module

for the couple of..

A couple of

the -- the minutes.

All the minutes.

- You comin' in?

- No.

- I'm kidding.

- Oh, I..

[stammers]

Me too. I know.

I mean, if I wasn't

and you did wanna come in

then, you know

I'd really appreciate it.

Mostly 'cause

I can't move my neck.

So you'd have to

do all the work.

So, uh, you're gonna be

seeing various images.

And then the MRI machine

is gonna do the rest.

So, uh, just look at them.

And I'll be over there if

you have any questions.

You won't have any..

- I mean, I don't

know why..

- Miss you already.

What?

[grunts]

Kevin Avery, 006.

Green light. Thank you.

Okay, that guy was

flirting with you.

And he is so cute.

He's a guy.

He can't help it.

He has to, you know,

sexualize everything.

You know,

to him I'm basically

a b -- blow-up doll.

Oh, my God!

That is what

you look like!

Oh, my God!

It's taken me months!

Thank you. Oh, my God.

- He seems sweet.

- Uh..

You're not gonna

be saying that

once you see

inside his...brain.

Aww.

Smushy.

So if he felt empathy

this entire area

would light up red.

Right there.

Look. Nothing.

But it's a kitten.

I know, he's not

feelin' the kitten.

But it's in a teacup.

He doesn't care.

Nope, nope!

It is lighting up!

- Nope, that's..

- Yeah, he's not

a serial killer.

That's on the low end,

even for a guy.

Next slide.

Nothing on the baby?

What a sicko!

Yeah, so in women,

this entire area

would light up red.

I can feel mine

lighting up inside.

What kind of weirdo

doesn't think that

baby is cute?

All of them.

Men are basically

only wired to respond

if it's their baby.

- Seriously?

- Mm-hm.

Now do you see

why I refuse

to participate in society?

Wow.

I'd really be depressed

if I wasn't on

anti-depressants.

You're on

anti-depressants?

Everyone's on

anti-depressants.

Are you

clinically depressed?

No! What?

- I can't.

- It's good.

It makes me less crazy.

That's interesting

because you sound insane.

Okay, there's no winning

with you, Julia.

Alright. Here we go.

- Ha-ha!

- Hm.

Kevin here

is on the lowest end

of the empathy scale.

That guy you thought

was so cute

and so sweet

turns out

he's the kind of guy

that goes to Africa

and pays people

to cut off...

elephant's...faces.

Science doesn't lie, so..

[instrumental music]

[door opens]

Hey, babe.

What?

Um...nothin'.

I was, um,

just asking how are you?

You haven't asked me

that in five years.

I remember 'cause

that was around the time

I started taking

fatherhood seriously.

I know.

That's so not cool.

That makes me wonder

do you think maybe

we just, like, stopped

tryin' a little bit?

- What do you mean?

- Well..

Well what?

You're wearing

crocs with socks.

- So are you.

- These are flats.

Mm, tsk!

I got some bad news

for you, baby.

Man...I feel like

maybe we just

stopped tryin'.

Maybe we need to connect

a little bit.

I stage houses for my job.

I make all things look

new and shiny.

Maybe that's what we need

in our relationship.

Sounds expensive.

Yeah, yeah,

maybe a little bit

but do you remember

how we used to dress up?

How we used to go out

on sexy dates?

So it's probably

not surprising

that females have a more

active system

for emotional memory

which means we recall

feelings, not just facts.

Something that's harder

for a man to do.

This is why it

seems like women

can access

visceral memories

with search engine

like speed.

We used to have sex

all over the house.

Baby, that was

before our walls

had all kinds of

finger paintings on 'em.

Kind of killed

the f*** vibe.

Yeah, but we used

to do things together

have things in common.

We used to have

hobbies together.

Baby, that was back

when we were friends.

Look, we still got

plenty of hobbies, alright?

We pay bills together.

Insurance.

We got water damage

in the basement together.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes